


Believer

by VeteranKlaus



Series: Let The Bullets Fly, Let Them Rain [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: ? - Freeform, AU, Angst, Character Death, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Isabel and Farlan are Alive, M/M, Minor Character Death, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Thug Levi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-07-07 20:54:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 49,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15916056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeteranKlaus/pseuds/VeteranKlaus
Summary: AU where Levi, Isabel and Farlan weren't caught in the underground.The Survey Corps has struggled over the years and now, with the secrets of titans and the walls unravelling, the last thing they need is drama in the underground and to have to recruit a group of thugs. They didn't need to be the target of a new enemy, either.





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> This part is kept somewhat short and is more to set the scene in the Underground. Next parts will be around the same length or, most likely, longer.  
> I'd love to hear any feedback!
> 
> I wanted to make an AU with the idea that the OG Trio had never gotten caught in No Regrets, and therefore lived in the underground together for more years before getting tied into the Survey Corps drama.  
> I also just like the idea of Levi joining the corps in a more open, vulnerable state, with the other OG Trio (Eren, Armin, Mikasa) and the 104th getting to know Levi, Isabel and Farlan, and them witnessing Levi's growth.
> 
> Title was taken from 'Believer' by Imagine Dragons.
> 
> In this fic, Levi, Isabel and Farlan are also slightly younger.

Levi wouldn't call his life amazing. Really, he would, and does, call it shitty, and Isabel gets on at him for that, but it is and they all know it. Life in the underground is never good, and they've had it hard enough with simply surviving in the mud and filth of the underground without the military police, and occasionally the survey corps, on their tails, too.

They'd had a few close calls with the survey corps, but managed to slip through their fingers in the end.

They'd gotten their attention with the use of their own gear- stolen from the illegal market that was run down there- and how they managed to train themselves with it. They'd had to tweak the gear to work better in the underground, but Isabel was smart with gear and tech and had upgraded it.

Years later, and they still used that gear. The trio had made quite a name for themselves in the underground between their skill in stealth and thievery and combat as well. Even if they had a reputation that made the clever not challenge them and kept them somewhat safe out of fear, life was still as horrendous as it always would be in the underground. Now, they just had to deal with muggings and murder attempts every three days instead of every day and they occasionally got to drink some tea if they got their hands on it.

Levi did suppose it could be worse, though. He could still be stuck with Kenny, for example, or he could not have Isabel and Farlan by his side. Sometimes it felt like they were the only reason he ate or tried some days.

Today, in what the underground assumed was the morning- he really had no sense of day or night, of any time, and he doubted anyone else did down here, when there was no light to judge it- was eerie. There was a sense of foreboding and dread in his stomach that he couldn't shake, and it got worse as time went on. He ignored when Isabel and Farlan asked if he was okay, and couldn't help how he subconsciously kept closer to them, his hand flying to the hilt of one of his many hidden knives at the slightest sound or movement. If something was happening, it wouldn't happen to either of those two.

He stood by the boarded window of their house as they ate a poor breakfast, narrowed eyes peering out of the cracks to the streets full of zombie-like people wandering, bags under their eyes, tense with the always present threat of danger, exhausted to the bone and malnourished and cold. He didn't feel sorry for them. Feeling sorry for people got you killed.

"Oh, Levi! Stop being such a sour-puss, come eat with us!" Isabel called from behind him, and when he glanced over, she was pouting, her bottom lip jutting out. He rolled his eyes lightly, but moved away from the window and over to where they sat by the small kitchen table.

“I’m not hungry, Isabel,” Levi responded, but he picked up the glass of clean water they’d poured for him. After a quick inspection of the liquid and the glass, he deemed it safe enough to drink and took a swig. Isabel and Farlan often called him a neat freak, and Levi chose to ignore how, through the years, his cleaning habits and disgust with the rats and bugs down here had gotten worse- becoming more of an obsession with cleaning and a phobia of the dirt and the rats and the bugs. He’d been vomiting and shaking after drinking from a glass and finding a dead bug at the bottom of the glass, and he’d played it off as an illness instead of a humiliating reaction to a harmless, dead bug. Sure, it was gross, but even remembering that had Levi holding himself back from gagging and throwing up again.

And anyhow, food had been scarce lately- the military police always loved to make life harder for the people living in the underground, and for the past week they’d taken to ransacking peoples’ houses for food or anything of value. Hell- he’d even seen someone’s shitty mattress get dragged out of their house and ruined in the mud and filth outside. So, until the military police got fed up with this mean streak again, Levi chose to give most of his food to Isabel or Farlan. They needed it more, anyway.

“You’re gonna become skin and bones, Levi,” Farlan commented teasingly, taking a bit from the bread he was eating.

“I still actually eat. I’m just not having a piece of bread and shitty jam for breakfast today,” Levi retorted, lips ghosting the rim of his glass of water.

“Oh, Levi-aniki’s in a bad mood tonight,” Isabel hummed, a sly smile on her lips.

Levi gave her another eye roll. “Something’s wrong today. I can feel it,” he muttered, one hand rubbing his opposite upper arm.

“I’m sure it’s nothing, Levi. C’mon, we’ll finish this and how about we go to our little spot, then. No one else knows where it is, and we can chill for a while,” Farlan offered. Levi pursed his lips, glancing around, before giving a small nod. That’d be nice.

“Sure, yeah. Let’s do that,” he agreed, his lips twitching up in a small smile.

Isabel threw her arms in the air with a cheer slightly muffled by the bread she’d stuffed into her mouth. She said something enthusiastically that he couldn’t really make out through the bread muffling her voice, but he snorted softly at her, even if there was a small smile on his face.

“Well? Hurry up then, Isabel, we’re waiting on you,” Levi stated when he noticed Farlan had finished eating.

Less than a minute later and they were helping one another into their 3DM gear and stepping outside.

People moved out of the way for them, not wanting to chance their luck and get into trouble with any of the trio, but Levi heard the whispers. _Levi the Knife, Levi the Cat, Levi the Shadow, Levi this_ and _Levi that,_ because Levi was the most confrontational out of the three of them, and even they constantly asked him to teach him how he’d learned to fight like he did. Levi taught them how to defend themselves, and ignored when they asked where he’d learned how to fight.

The sunlight hurt his eyes when they came into the small opening, and he had to blink a few times to get used to it. The sky they could see was bright blue, with only one cloud in sight, and it cast shadows down into the cavern they sat in.

Levi leaned against the dirt wall, leaning one elbow on his knee. He turned his face into the sun rays that reached down to them. Here, odd patches of grass grew, and there was even one flower, small and frail, but still there, and Isabel was sitting on the ground by it, head tilted up and a wide smile on her face.

Farlan settled beside Levi, leaning back on his hands. He closed his eyes and soaked in the sun, letting out a content sigh.

“D’you really think we’ll ever get to live out there?” Farlan asked after a moment.

Levi raised an eyebrow slighty. “Maybe,” he nodded. He paused for a moment, before nodding once more. “Yes,” he said instead, turning back to look at him. Farlan’s lips twitched up slightly, and the blonde looked towards the hole above them.

“I hope so,” he said softly.

“Tch. Stop hoping, idiot, it’s already going to happen. I’ve promised you both that I’ll get you out there,” Levi responded dismissively, and Farlan smiled wider.

“Of course, Levi,” he grinned, and Levi returned it softly.

“Trust Levi-aniki, Farlan! He said he’d bring us outside, he will!” Isabel exclaimed from where she sat by the flower, her eyes glittering in the sunlight.

Farlan beamed at the girl, and threw his arm around Levi next to him, pulling him against his chest with a laugh when he lost his balance slightly, gripping the back of his shirt.

“I’d never doubt Levi!” He stated, tightening his hold on the shorter male when he tried to wiggle out of his grip.

“Cause Levi’s such a nice, generous, loving, thoughtful, caring-“

“Don’t forget sweet-natured!” Isabel perked up, grinning at Levi’s scowl and reddening cheeks.

“Oh, of course! He has a heart of pure gold, too!”

“Pure, pure gold right there,” Isabel nodded.

“You two can live out your life down here,” Levi grumbled, finally managed to slip out of Farlan’s grip without resorting to force or violence.

Farlan snorted, finally letting out his laughter, and Isabel pouted her bottom lip out again.

“You can’t get rid of us, Levi! You’ll always be haunted by us!” Isabel declared, and then she plucked the delicate flower from the ground and strode over to the boys. She pulled open Levi’s pocket on his chest and dropped the little plant in it.

“That’s what I’ll possess when you’re living it up with the nobles and Farlan and I are kicking it in the kitchen with our pet rat,” Isabel said, sticking her tongue out. Levi rolled his eyes and nudged her slightly.

“Alright, Isabel,” he responded with a snort. The girl slid down to sit next to them, wedging herself between the boys.

For a while, they were quiet. They watched the clouds through the hole pass by, listened to the birds and far off chatter they could hear, and enjoyed the peace they got.

Levi had been deep in thought when a sudden commotion from where they’d came from caught his attention, and all three of them whipped their heads around to the narrow tunnel they’d squeezed through.

“Should we go?” Isabel asked quietly when, after multiple moments passed and the commotion- indistinct yells, general clatter and chaos.

Levi narrowed his eyes, pushing himself to his feet.

“We have our gear,” he said, “we can go check it out at least. It could be something important,” he decided, and received nods from Isabel and Farlan.

They squeezed their way back into the city, keeping to the shadows and moving silently until they got to the main streets and city centre where they found the source of commotion. Unsurprisingly, it was the military police morning’s patrol. Levi knew this group tended to be more sadistic than the others.

Now, they were laughing at the remnants of a food stall they’d just trashed, and the elderly man who had been in charge of it was on the ground, looking up at the taunting police.

Levi clenched his jaw, balled his hands into fists and glared at the military police in disgust. They were spineless, ball-less, repulsive cowards. Levi had known the man to be a kind, generous person, one of the few who existed and wasn’t taken advantage of in the underground.

Isabel set her hand on his shoulder, and shook her head.

“They won’t hurt him. It’s not worth it,” she whispered. Levi kept his mouth shut, but forced his hands to relax.

Levi tried to ignore the ruthless laughter that came from the pigs, ignored the way people with hollowed out cheeks and sunken eyes eyed the mud-covered stale bread and bruised apples. One person- a god damned child- snatched one of the filthy apples.

Levi slid back into the shadows, turned around tensely. He’d hope that someone got to them before he did, to save his hands getting dirty with their filthy blood.

Farlan led the way as they went back into the alleys away from the scene.

“They’re disgusting cowards,” Levi snapped as he leaned against the wall.

Isabel gave him a sad smile and a nod. “I know. But it won’t be forever,” she offered. Levi had a retort on his tongue, but like always when it came to either Isabel or Farlan, it died, and he simply nodded.

“Let’s head back home, then, before they can raid anything,” Farlan stepped in, and Levi nodded. When Farlan took off with a whiz from his gear, he and Isabel followed behind him, blocking out the yells that called after them.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are enjoying this, please let me know with a kudos or a comment, it makes my day!

Much to Levi’s pleasure, their house had not been ransacked while they were away- though there were the heavy footsteps dug into the mud, indicating that, at least, the military police had gone by. That confused Levi slightly- they normally chose to ransack each house they passed, and if they knew this was where he and Isabel and Farlan stayed, then surely they would have chosen to break in.

Levi tried to brush off the thought and settled on the old couch against one wall after stripping his gear off, setting it aside.

“How long do you think we’ve got before they start marching around and set our blankets on fire or some crap?” Isabel asked rhetorically, tone bitter, and a sigh followed her words.

“Speak quieter. Don’t give them ideas, dumb-ass,” Levi said sarcastically, and Isabel stuck her tongue out at him.

“I do wonder why they were out in the centre,” Isabel mused, and she lifted herself to sit on the arm of the couch. Farlan folded his arms loosely across his chest, glancing to the door.

“To mess with us, for the fun of it,” he shrugged, though his eyebrows furrowed and his lips twitched in a slight scowl.

“They have nothing better to do than fuck up our lives. I wouldn’t hate them any less if they at least simply took the food away and said it was for rationing up there, or some shit, but at least it wouldn’t be so fucking sadistic,” Levi hissed, crossing one leg over the other and letting out a quiet _tch._

Levi shook his head softly to himself. They practically got off on ruining peoples already shitty lives down here, while they got to go back home to warm, freshly cooked meals and soft beds and blankets and showers, while they were here, sleeping on the floor, starving, fighting to not get mugged or murdered, and living in their own filth. As much as Levi longed to get out of this hell hole, he didn’t think he’d be able to take it if everyone outside took their luxuries for granted.

God, what he’d do to get a hot shower every day- hell, every second day, every third day. He’d take what he could get.

Levi took slow breaths to calm himself, and he took the remainder of his anger out on the filthy creature climbing on the wall behind him, ignoring how it made his skin crawl until it was dead. He shook his hand out with a frown of disgust.

“They’ll get the shit they deserve,” Levi muttered, though it was more to himself.

Isabel and Farlan nodded grimly, and Farlan peeled himself away from the boarded up window.

“Guess we have some time to kill before they start going through houses, then,” he sighed, his boots scuffing the floor as he walked over and settled in one of the rickety wooden chairs in the room. Levi grimaced when it creaked dangerously, but it wasn’t about to give out yet.

Slowly, a small smile grew on Isabel’s face, and Levi leaned back in his head.

“No,” he said, shaking his head. Isabel’s smile grew, parodying the horror growing on Levi and Farlan’s.

“Isabel, please-“ Farlan gasped, leaning forwards in his seat.

“You know what this means,” she said slowly, a dark glint in her eyes and a mischievous smile twisting her lips.

“I will leave and never look back,” Levi threatened sarcastically, getting ready to stand up off the seat.

“Come on! I know you both secretly love it!” Isabel accused, throwing her hands up in the air.

“No! No, we do not!” Farlan replied firmly, shaking his head.

Isabel scoffed, shaking her head. She stood up, planting her hands on her hips, and pouted at them.

“Levi-aniki… Please?” She whined, drawing out the words, and Levi rolled his eyes. “You should know that Farlan’s the easiest to manipulate out of us two, dumb-ass,” he snorted, ignoring how Farlan dramatically dropped his jaw.

“Don’t kid yourself, Farlan,” he said, a smirk twitching his lips.

Farlan closed his mouth and let out a small sigh, turning his head down. “Maybe just a bit,” he admitted quietly, and Levi smirked at him.

Isabel sighed, falling onto the couch next to Levi. “You’re no fun,” she stated.

“By all means, go yourself, Isabel. I’ll happily stay here,” Levi shrugged. He pushed himself off the old couch, heading towards the stove. He pulled a match from the box they left on the counter, and lit it. Turning the gas on, he lit one ring and pulled the metal pot full of water onto it.

“Tea?” He asked Farlan conversationally, eyebrow raised.

“I could drink.”  Farlan nodded, turning to Levi and ignoring Isabel’s hurt gasp.

“Fine! If you two want to be boring and drink your shitty tea all day, the least one of you can do is read to me,” she opted for instead. Levi hummed, putting the top over the pot and turning around.

“Why not,” he shrugged. Isabel looked over at him hopefully. He raised an eyebrow. He turned to Farlan. “Go entertain her, then,” he said, and Farlan groaned dramatically as he stood, turning and lumbering into the room they slept in. Levi could hear one of the mattress’s being moved, followed by the thud of wooden floorboards being peeled back, and a few moments and thuds later Farlan re-emerged in the room, hands dusty but holding a red-covered book.

They kept all of their more valuable things hidden under their loose floorboards, and it had worked so far- no one raiding the house had found that.

As Levi brewed the tea, he listed to Farlan as he sat down next to Isabel, opened the book to its first page, and began reading it aloud.

Levi had tried to teach himself to read once, and ironically it was the same night a group of military police had barged into the different, shitty house he had been living in and ransacked it, burning the books in front of him. After that, he’d found it too tedious to try and learn how, even if it infuriated him and made him feel even more stupid and lowly. Even if he tried to, he doubted he’d find the time now to dedicate enough to actually learning it. So, he cleverly skirted around reading anything more than a few simple sentences like ‘wanted, dead or alive’, because everything else seemed useless anyway. At least, down here it was.

Levi wasn’t sure if Farlan or Isabel actually knew that he couldn’t properly read or write. He glanced at the two he’d grown close to, sitting next to each other. He thought they probably had their suspicions, but, thankfully, they hadn’t ever pressed.

With the tea done, he poured a cup for him and Farlan and set Farlan’s on the table in front of him, and then leaned against the wall by his side with his own, watching him turn the pages with one hand and listening to him reading the jumble of letters on the paper.

For a while, that was what they did. Farlan paused his reading to take sips of the bitter tea Levi had made him, and sometimes Levi would scoff at the story he told, the idiocy of the characters’ decisions, or Isabel would interrupt him with questions he sometimes couldn’t answer. Levi ended up being coaxed into sitting with them, letting tension fall out of his body. Enjoyed the domesticity of the situation. The way Farlan never stuttered over the words he read, how Isabel had slid down to rest her head on Levi’s shoulder (after muttering a curse about his damned height) and how the tea warmed its way into his stomach. The familiar occasional yell from outside and far-off crashes. Somehow, this situation had become home for him, and while he certainly wasn’t one for domesticity, if they were sitting in a well-cleaned house with the sun shining into windows above ground, he might have been content with this as his life.

Isabel was commenting on the story, requesting Farlan to clear up her confusion, when Levi heard it. The loud, cocky laughter drowning out the cries of protest in the street.

Much to Isabel’s protest, Levi stood up, snatched the book from Farlan’s hands- consequently tearing off a couple of pages that fluttered down to the floor and slid half-under the couch, and shoved the book under the couch. He glanced at the tea cups still out briefly, scowling, but he didn’t have time before the door was thrown open and a group of military police wandered leisurely in.

“Good afternoon,” one of them called out, and Levi wrinkled his nose at the stench of alcohol rolling off of him.

“Oh, look, you even prepared tea for us!” He snorted, and waved in all of his friends. “We’ve heard about you lot, so we’re just here to check for anything suspicious,” he drawled, and Levi refrained from rolling his eyes. The other police behind him filled the room, carelessly ransacking the place- pulling open their cupboards, throwing the little food they didn’t keep hidden away into a bag they had or on the floor, now dirty from their mud-covered boots.

The obviously drunk and roudy one staggered around, turning his nose up at them. He stopped in front of them, looked at the tea cups on the table, and picked one up- Farlan’s. It was still half-full, but cold by now, and he picked it up, sniffed it, and his lips turned down in a scowl. Then, he let it fall from his fingers, smashing on the ground. Levi bristled, hands curling into fists, and Farlan gently touched his wrist.

The second tea cup joined it quickly, splintering against the wall.

They threw the couch cushions off the floor, scanned the entire room, and when they moved into their bedroom, they followed behind. Levi, as soon as they kicked one mattress aside, stood on top of the creaking floorboards, clasped his hands behind his back.

“These are actually pretty nice,” one of the men, a tall, balding man, commented as he inspected one of the three mattresses they’d managed to get.

“What should we do with these then?” He called to the drunk man, who seemed to be the leader of this pack of mutts.

He pursed his lips thoughtfully, leaned against the wall uncomfortably close to Levi. He placed a hand on the shorter mans shoulder, and Levi fought every instinct not to break it.

“I don’t think they really need them,” he responded, leaning closer to Levi and raising an eyebrow.

“Do ya?”

With that, the mattresses, two with their blankets still tangled around them, were getting dragged out, and Farlan firmly held Isabel’s shoulders before she could jump forwards. Levi glared at the police as they dragged them out of the room, and then onto the streets. He didn’t bother following them like Isabel and Farlan did, but instead stayed directly on the spot, watching through a crack in the wood boarding the window when flames devoured their belongings.

“Nothing personal, short-stack, but y’all living down here don’t need those luxuries. They’re for real people.”

Levi had been happy enough to ignore how the leader had stayed behind with them, hadn’t dropped his hand from his shoulder yet, and how his breath made Levi want to throw up if he had anything but tea in his stomach, but now he couldn’t. Levi cranked his fist back, and within a split second, the drunkard was on his knees, clutching a broken nose.

“Go on, then,” Levi hissed, tone low and deadly, “run away with your tail between your legs like the cowardly mutt you all are.” While his hand itched to land another punch to the man, who was more than deserving, he held back, took pride in how he could only mutter out a pathetic insult before complying, scurrying out of the house.

There were a few shouts of shock, probably from the other military police, and then laughter- he could hear Isabel’s proud laughter, and Farlan’s mocking tone to his, and the quieter, more hesitant but genuine laughter of the other people. If there was one thing people in the Underground could agree on, it was their hatred for the military police.

Footsteps thundered back inside, and Levi had already braced himself in the time it took them to reach the bedroom again, and he greeted one of the police with another punch, and the next with a brutal kick to the stomach.

His fingers twisted in the thin hair of one officer, and he threw him back against the wall before his foot found home in his face when he fell again. One approached from behind and leaned over to grab him, and Levi managed to buck his hips back and throw him over his shoulder. He stomped down ruthlessly on his chest, and glared at him.

“Now, you all might want to get the fuck out of here,” he warned, one hand still clenched in a fist. They seemed to get the memo, though, and scrambled to their feet and out of the house, spitting threats over their shoulders at him. Levi leisurely walked to the door, and leaned against its frame. Farlan and Isabel still stood by their flaming mattresses, grinning at him.

“Fuckin’ pathetic.” Levi shook his head, and then turned back inside to begin cleaning up the mess they’d left.

His two friends joined him quickly, helping to pick up the couch cushions and sharp shards left on the floor, and Farlan dried the floor with one of the dirty rags they had specifically for that job.

“Well, you two can probably fit on the couch to sleep,” Levi said, his tone more weary now.

Farlan gave him a challenging look, and Levi glared back. “Don’t be a dumb-ass- you’ll hurt your back on the floor. I hardly sleep anyway,” he snorted, and turned back to picking up the remnants of their teacups.

“We can take turns,” Farlan tried. Levi stared at him harshly for a long moment, but let out a defeated sigh. He’d only ever back down to Isabel or Farlan, but he simply couldn’t fight them. They could hold a knife to his throat and he doubted he’d fight them.

Farlan grinned at him, patting his arm. “Good talk. Now c’mon- we’ve got food to restock,” he stated. Levi nodded. Right. No point in wallowing now. They had to pick themselves up and sort this mess out again.

He never should have gotten comfortable.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We finally get the ball rolling here!
> 
> Long chapter, and I'd say, from here on is where the plot really gets going with the Survey Corps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments keep me writing! If you liked it, even a simple comment saying so makes my day!

It had been two weeks since their incident with the military police, and the tea-stains had been washed from the floor thoroughly. They had taken turns sleeping on the couch, but Levi had managed to only sleep on it twice within the past seven- usually, he would simply slide down the wall when his body got tired, or take one of the wooden seats, and rest for as long as his body would let him. That was never for that long, though, but he’d finally gotten used to it.

Levi’s body ached faintly, a distant feeling that spiked when he moved a certain way. The physical exertion mixed with exhaustion and malnourishment was slowly taking its toll on him, even if he didn’t show it around Isabel and Farlan, he knew he had to step up his game- get them some more food, find mattresses (though it seemed like they’d taken every damn mattress in the Underground and burnt them) and let his body rest. But now, he didn’t have time for that.

Levi was curious if there was something going on above ground, because now, after messing with them, they really were taking food from them now, saying they needed to ration it with above ground. While Levi felt that was probably true, he didn’t think they needed to take so much damn food.

Most stalls that had been selling food were closed now- keeping what they could for themselves and being forced to give the rest to the military police. Levi had seen the carts of food, shamefully low, too, even while it was the majority of the existing food down here, being pulled outside.

Levi landed silently in an alley, lowering his arms and leaning against the wall with a breath. He’d been searching for what felt like ages to find one open stall, an easily-accessible house with food in sight, but it seemed everyone else was on the same page as he was. He knew that from the way familiar faces had become more angular within the past few weeks with little food. He’d heard the mournful crying coming from houses while skeletal bodies had been carried out by uncaring officials, covered in a dirty white blanket, some people gone a little too long with insufficient food.

Levi tilted his head up, sucked in a breath, and waited until the pain in his stomach subsided. He ground his teeth together, tightened his hold on his 3DMG, and straightened up.

A disgusting thought entered his mind when he thought of the next place to search for food, something that made his starving stomach flip in protest, something he used to do when he was younger in situations like this.

No, that was a last resort. He would only resort to that if he or Isabel or Farlan were about to collapse from hunger- and he knew they were nearing that point, they couldn’t hide it as well as he could- and he hadn’t checked every single house and nook and cranny in this shit hole.

With determination simply from not wanting to go to his last resort, Levi forced himself on- anchors landing into a wall and shooting him up. Next house.

The people he passed in the street looked so depressed and fucking pitiful that Levi couldn’t believe this was a way of life. He passed someone laying in an alley who Levi doubted he was even alive anymore, and it would be a few days before anyone else found his body unless it began decaying quickly. Then again, the rats would probably get to him and someone find scratched up bones on blood stained dirt instead.

The house he peered into didn’t have any food, easily seen by the large family that were sitting on the floor together, cheekbones sharp and young children crying quietly from the pain in their stomach.

The next house was empty, too. The one after that was simply abandoned, completely, and the one after that one had a half-rotten apple in it. Levi wondered if he could cut the alright part away from the rotten half.

Each house proved all but useless- he did manage to get two slices of stale, but edible, bread, found in a cupboard of someones house. They weren’t home, and Levi decided that they didn’t need it if they weren’t eating it immediately. At least that meant Farlan and Isabel could get one slice each.

After that, he decided to return back quickly- he’d give them the food he’d currently found, and then he’d head out again.

Isabel eyed him hopefully when he stepped back inside. She nudged Farlan awake, and the way their eyes had sunken in over the weeks gave Levi a burst of determination. He would ransack the entire city, hell, he’d break out of here to find them more food.

Levi pulled out the two slices of bread, and even though it was nothing, their eyes lit up.

“I’ve not searched everywhere yet, but I thought I should at least bring you this until I’m done,” he said, walking over and handing one slice to each person, which they took eagerly.

“Thank you, Levi-aniki! I knew you’d find something,” Isabel beamed up at him, about to bite into it, when Farlan spoke up.

“Did you have anything?” He asked. Levi wanted to curse the concern in his voice.

“There were two slices of bread and a few crackers. I had the crackers,” he lied with a dismissive shrug. Farlan raised an eyebrow, and tore a part of bread off, holding it to Levi.

“Don’t be an idiot. I’ll find more,” Levi said, “so you can have that bit.”

He didn’t give him time to insist before he was turning around and heading outside again, 3DMG pulling him through the streets with a quiet hiss of wires.

He picked off where he left, and through the next ten houses, he found less than a handful of food- three crackers, of which he had half of one to try and stop the way his mouth watered disgustingly, an orange, and another piece of stale bread. With those carefully stored away in his bag, he began to head back home when he paused. Looked back to the building he could see at the end of the street, sticking out like a sore thumb.

With bigger candles lighting it up and a decent foundation and an entirely different design to every other house down here, he immediately recognised it. He didn’t need to see the people outside of it. It was risky- close to the exit, which was always guarded, but as he got closer without even realising it, he smelled it- hot, fresh food. Though the plates weren’t as full as they usually were- maybe they really did have to ration food above ground- it was more than what Levi had eaten in an entire two weeks.

No doubt was there more food inside. He could be in and out within a minute, with a bag full of warm, real, nutritious food. Enough to feed him, Isabel and Farlan for days.

He had to risk it. If he didn’t risk it now, he’d risk it later when they were even weaker and eating from the garbage, and be more likely to get caught.

He stuck to the shadows, moved silently and pressed into the little dips as he got closer. They were laughing, talking, though they seemed slightly more tense than the military police usually were.

He didn’t feel sorry if there was some shit going on above ground that made them actually work. He doubted anyone above ground saw people starving in mud and filth, dying without ever having seen the sun, their meatless corpse being devoured by rats.

Through the window, Levi could see the few people downstairs by the kitchen- where the food was. Most people must be upstairs, then, where their beds were, or outside. The people inside were talking over glasses of alcohol. Their backs were to the counter and refrigerator, where Levi could already see food. His stomach cramped painfully.

The window closest to the kitchen was open, and for once Levi was grateful for his small frame. The people in the room were at the other end, by the roaring fire, backs to him, to the food.

When he was sure no one was coming, Levi went for it. He moved silently, swinging one leg over the window, followed by his other, and pulling the rest of his body through, landing silently.

No one moved.

He crept towards the kitchen, one hand undoing the tie on his small bag on his hip. He’d grab what he could first, and as soon as it was in, he’d get out. They’d probably not even notice that food was missing.

He reached it with no problem, and his mouth began watering. There was a large serving plate of still-warm rice, vegetables and meat, and after a moments hesitation, he began taking small handfuls and dropping it into the bag.

_“D’you think they’re gonna get the whole situation sorted quickly? There’s not enough rations for everyone up there.”_

_“You’re telling me. We have nowhere to put them- nobody wants to let another family stay with them. They don’t have the space for it. Or the food, or recourses- the Survey Corps is hardly doing anything either. Good for nothing, that branch is.”_

Levi’s ears perked slightly as the men by the fire spoke, a bitter tone to their voices.

 _“They do fuck all. But hey- if they get enough people killed outside those walls, maybe we’ll make more room for the fuckin’ evacuees,”_ one snorted, and the other barked out bitter laughter.

Levi’s eyes narrowed in their direction, hand hovering over his bag, full of rice.

_“Should just shove ‘em all down here. We’ve bled this place dry and hardly got enough rations to spread through ten families. Just behind the Survey Corps, this place probably has the highest death rates in a short time.”_

_“You’re almost making me feel sorry for the scum down here, Jack,”_ the other snorted. Levi ground his teeth together. He glanced down at his bag- almost full with rice and vegetables and meat, piled on top of the food he’d found in the other houses. It’d be enough for now.

Just as he turned, the door opened, and his foot made the floor creak. Eyes whipped around to him, the person stepping inside froze half way in, staring at Levi with wide eyes.

“Stay still!” One officer shouted, and immediately they were running at him. Levi clenched his fist, and leapt for the window.

Their shouts got more attention, and Levi felt light headed from the sudden rush of adrenaline. As soon as he was out of the window, tying the bag of precious food closed, he was using his 3DMG to get away, even if the military police tried to follow on foot until he was out of sight.

Even though he was out of their sight, and he was he had lost them, he continued going around the long way, cutting through alleys and houses, just in case anyone was following him. Five minutes later, he deemed it safe to go home, and excitement ran through his veins. The look on their faces when he came home with this food…

Farlan and Isabel were on the couch still, and Farlan was reading a book to Isabel once more, though they both looked like they were going to fall asleep. When the door opened, both of them jumped, Farlan going to hide the book, but they both relaxed when they saw Levi.

“You okay, Levi-aniki? You look tired?” Isabel questioned softly, her head tilting to the side. Levi let out a breath, shoulders slumping.

“Of course I’m fine,” he snorted, walking over, “I just had to make sure I’d ditched the police,” he said, watching as their eyebrows shot up.

“Levi! What did you do?” She asked, and Farlan had closed the book, worry creasing his face.

“I just got us some more food, geez,” he replied. He untied the bag from his belt, and set it on the table, letting it fall open. The food was still slightly warm, and Levi turned around with a small smile. God damnit, he was proud of himself.

Farlan’s mouth fell open and he stood up. “How did you… Did you steal this from the police?” He asked, stumped, and Levi nodded with an impassive expression.

“Got some information, too,” he stated. He gestured to the food. “Help yourselves. It’s a good night,” he said. Immediately, Farlan and Isabel were by the food, dropping pieces of meat into their mouths and Isabel was rambling about how amazing he was for getting this food.

With his adrenaline and excitement crashing, Levi didn’t even step out of his 3DMG and all but fell into one of the wooden seats by the table. He listened half heartedly to them, until his head started to droop involuntarily and his eyes started to close. He recognised, faintly, that he’d never do this- fall asleep so open, without knowing they were safe, especially after just having stolen from the military police, but his body was exhausted and that little excursion seemed to take the last of it.

“Levi! Levi, hey!” Farlan was by his ear, nudging him until he startled awake. He had to blink a few times, and his eyes protested at still being open. He raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“C’mon, you got so much food- it’s family meal time, Levi,” Farlan joked, a smile on his lips, but Levi could see the heart-warming yet irritating concern in his eyes.

Farlan pulled Levi’s chair closer, and put a piece of the meat in his hand. Levi looked at it longingly, knew how much better it’d be going to Farlan or Isabel, and shoved it into his mouth.

He tried to keep his pace slow, knowing his stomach would react violently if he shovelled the food into his mouth immediately, but the way his mouth watered endlessly and his body just wanted to inhale the entire thing was hard to deal with.

“Apparently there’s actually some shit going on above ground,” Levi said. “They were talking about evacuees- not having enough space or food for them. Said they should just shove them down here or with the Survey Corps. Y’know- so they’ll just die and clear up space,” Levi retorted.

Knowledge of the walls and life above ground was pretty limited in the Underground. They knew they lived inside walls, and outside the walls were human-eating giants. They knew there were three branches- Military Police, Survey Corps, and the Garrison. They knew the Military Police were the people that burned their stuff and stole their food, and they knew the Survey Corps went outside the walls to kill the titans, and they used the gear Levi, Farlan and Isabel had stolen from the market.

What general life was actually like? He couldn’t even imagine it. All he could imagine was filth and starvation and violence and fighting to stay alive everyday. He couldn’t imagine something different.

Levi wanted to laugh. God, he spoke about how he and Isabel and Farlan would get out of here, live their lives out in the sun no matter what, but Levi wondered, realistically, would he be able to live out there?

Knowing what life under his feet was like. Would he be able to cope if people took clean water and a meal a day, warm food, sunlight, like it was nothing. To him, it was a goddamned miracle, a luxury his life couldn’t afford.

Levi shook his head. No. Whatever life was like out there, he swore to himself, to the people he considered family, they would get out there. None of them were dying in this filth.

“Really? Damn. Wonder what’s going on, then. Titan troubles? Civil war?” Farlan muttered curiously, picking at a vegetable.

Levi shrugged. “Who knows. Sucks for them, now the military police actually have to do work,” Levi retorted sarcastically, rolling his eyes and picking at the rice. While he wanted to just eat the entire thing now, he was hesitant to keep picking at it- who knew when they’d get more food.

Apparently, the other two were thinking the same, as they sat back. “Should we ration the rest out for a while?” Isabel suggested quietly, though it was phrased more like a question and sounded as reluctant as he felt.

He nodded. “Probably the best idea,” he agreed, and began to bring the cloth back up to tie it closed, while scraping the spare grains of rice up in his hand and dropping it in. He was quick to hide the bag of food in the space under the floorboards in their now empty bedroom, making sure it was stiff to lift the floorboards off, and returned back to the living room.

“Levi, you never cease to amaze me,” Isabel sighed, a hand contently placed over her stomach as she pushed it out to look more bloated. Levi rolled his eyes playfully, flicking her as he walked past and to the couch. “Don’t get used to it, we can’t have you getting fat now,” he joked, and Isabel gasped.

“Real men like their women with a little bit of meat, you ass!” She snapped with a playful grin. Levi snorted, falling onto the couch and leaning back.

“A real man would see you and crap themselves. You’re too crazy for any man,” he replied with a small smirk.

Isabel placed a hand over her heart.

“I’m wounded, Levi-aniki, so hurt!” She cried, closing her eyes. Levi closed his too.

Now that he’d eaten, and though he had heavily held himself back so they could have more rations and his stomach still begged for more food, he was ready to curl up and sleep for an entire day (even if that was impossible for him), and he could feel himself dozing off first for once.

Sometimes, Levi hated the universe.

It was a sudden abrupt change to his train of thought, but his door being kicked in was also an abrupt change to his day. He flipped off of the seat, heart beating so quickly so suddenly it made him feel dizzy.

Coming into the house with a furious and sadistic expression was a familiar face- one that had bruises around his nose and eyes that were just going away. Behind him, other than two other military police officers, were a group of people with dark green cloaks over their shoulders. The man in front caught his eyes in a split second, and his blood ran cold.

Commander Erwin Smith, the same man he’d almost gotten caught by an intermediate amount of time ago. (It was hard to tell the time in the Underground, but Levi guessed it was anywhere from one year to three. Who knows.)

“It’s that one!” The military officer hissed, crooked finger pointed straight at Levi.

Levi was so glad he had been too ready to pass out to take his 3DMG off.

“Three-twelve!” Levi barked, and immediately pushed off the floor, forcing everyone in front of him to move out of his way as he leapt out of the door. He trusted that Isabel and Farlan had acted as quickly, and that the people there were there for him.

The sound of wires followed him, and when he looked back he saw Commander Erwin and three other people in the Survey Corps following after him, and they were catching up to him.

Levi glared, and forced the gas to push him faster. He knew how Erwin moved, but he couldn’t recognise the other three- and hadn’t there actually been four?

_… Shit!_

As they went under a tunnel, Levi slammed his anchors into the ground just in time to miss the fourth person ducking down to get him. He hit the ground hard, but used the advantage of being on the ground to backtrack quickly, the Survey Corps going past him with their momentum.

He ducked through alleys, swung widely over the roofs of houses and pulled himself through the windows of houses, running through them before leaping out another window. He stuck to the shadows, and sometimes went on foot through the alleys to throw them off. He was beginning to think he’d lost them, and was ready to change his trajectory to bring him back home, when a body barrelled into him, knocking the air out of his lungs and making him black out for a second.

When he looked up, of course it was Erwin Smith standing over him again, eyes cold and unforgiving. As soon as they landed, Levi could see how two of them were missing. He swore to himself, and immediately kicked off of Erwin, dropping his swords and opting for one of his knives hidden in his clothes.

Erwin lunged for him, and Levi ducked through his legs and spun around, aiming for his knees. Erwin jumped out of the way just in time, and spun around with a speed that Levi’s sluggish mind couldn’t keep up with.

He hadn’t eaten anything for two weeks, and had survived off of very little sleep and over-exertion on top of that, and now he’d just ate a sudden fair amount of food in his small stomach’s point of view, and it made Levi feel like that one time he’d gotten horribly ill, to the point he’d been delusional.

He hardly registered the kick to his face until he had spun around and his face landed in a puddle.

_Get up. Get up! You need to get up!_

As much as he yelled at himself to do this, his body was still reeling, and he could feel his food come rushing back up. He only just managed to lift his upper body in time before he was vomiting what he’d just eaten, his cheeks burning red.

“You’ve gotten worse, Levi,” Erwin stated, stepping over and kneeling next to the shorter man. “You lasted longer two years ago,” he stated. Levi glared up at him through his bangs, sticking to his head with the filthy puddle water and mud. It made his skin crawl.

“Dying does that to a person,” Levi hissed. His eyes flicked away from Erwin, looking at the other people around them. Only two other guys, fairly young looking, and one looked horrified to be here.

Footsteps caught his attention, and he turned back around. Running behind Erwin was the military police, breathing heavily.

“Commander, your squad leader Hange and Mikasa have the other two caught. They’re waiting back at the original house,” one of them wheezed out. Erwin simply nodded and thanked them, turning back to Levi.

“So, how about you tell me why we’ve been called to deal with you again?” Erwin asked in a tone that made Levi want to punch him. He dug his fingers into the mud under him.

“How the fuck should I know? I was about to fall asleep until you all barged in,” Levi hissed coldly. He watched Erwin let out a slow breath.

“Commander, if I may- he was caught stealing large amounts of food from the military police base here, as well as attacking several officers over the past three weeks and interfering with our business. We’re expected to bring him above ground for his sentence, which should, justly, be hard labour for us. He should be grateful we aren’t sentencing him to death for his disrespect,” one of the military officers spoke up- the other one that had ran here. He had been one that had burned their mattresses.

Erwin raised an eyebrow, and turned to look at Levi. “Is this true?” He asked, as if he gave a shit about Levi’s opinion.

The dark-haired man snorted, let his lips spread in a hateful grin.

“Depends what you mean by ‘large amounts’, Commander. Not like they didn’t steal it from us first, shit-head. Unlike some people here, I don’t roll over when they kick us,” Levi ground out, his beginning tone dripping with sarcasm when he said ‘commander’, his glare focused on the officers.

Erwin looked at them over his shoulder. “We’ll head back to the other two with him. You’re dismissed. We’ll see that they’re punished accordingly,” Erwin promised. The officers seemed reluctant to agree, but eventually did.

Erwin’s hand on his arm yanked him to his feet, and the sudden motion made Levi want to throw up again. He didn’t let go as he began the walk back to his house, and Levi knew he needed to bide his time before he could try and escape. Plus, he had to see Isabel and Farlan.

The men- boys- behind him were quiet, but the blonde one radiated anxiety.

“That food was valuable,” Levi stated, glancing up at Erwin. The Commander’s eyes were trained forwards, but he knew he was listening. “And thanks to you I’ve gone and thrown it up. _Tch._ I’ll have to steal more now,” Levi snorted. Erwin just tightened his bruising grip around Levi’s bicep. Levi noticed how his fingers were just about to meet around his bicep, and Levi wondered if it was because he was simply small compared to the tall Commander, or if it was due to the weeks without food. Maybe if he looked like shit, which he didn’t doubt he did- covered in mud and filth, hardly able to walk by himself and having just thrown up two weeks worth of food, it would get him some sympathy underestimation and he could exploit that.

The military police weren’t there when they reached his house, but Isabel and Farlan were- they were sitting on the couch as if nothing was wrong, ignoring the two Survey Corps women with their swords drawn in front of them, holding them back.

“They haven’t said anything, Commander,” the one closest to the door- with some red scarf and dark hair- reported.

“Thank you, Mikasa. You can put away your swords,” Erwin said calmly. He pushed one of the chairs out and looked pointedly at Levi.

Levi ignored it.

_“Do they live here…?”_

The blonde one, the one who looked completely out of place in a Survey Corps cloak, whispered to the brunette. Levi’s lips twitched upwards.

“Sure do. Make yourself comfortable. There’s, uh, two chairs you can sit on- that one might break, actually, I don’t advise that one- and we can go gather some gutter water if you want tea,” Levi offered in a sarcastic tone, rolling his eyes.

“You sure do cause us a lot of trouble, Levi,” Erwin said, and Levi turned his steely gaze to him again.

“I’m sure I do, _Commander._ But it’s simple- tell the military police to fuck off, and I won’t have to be a pain in the ass,” Levi said casually. Erwin sighed.

“Why did you steal food from a military base? I expected you had some common sense, from our last meeting,” Erwin sighed. He sounded so patronising that Levi wanted to just- punch him, or something. Of course he didn’t understand.

“Where else was I supposed to fucking get it, wise guy?” Levi spat. “You saw the people who live here. Where do you think you get half of your rations when stuff goes to shit up there? They don’t even take half of our food- no, they take all of it. I told you that food that, thanks to you, I just threw up, was valuable,” Levi retorted bitterly, glaring coldly at him.

“Levi!” He had really been hoping she wouldn’t do that. Levi glanced towards Isabel. She didn’t look hurt- if anything, she looked more scared and worried for Levi. He supposed she hadn’t seen him look this bad in a while.

“I’m fine, Isabel,” he said gently, looking down for a moment before away.

Erwin looked slightly disturbed for a moment, and Levi thought: _good. So he should be._

“Mikasa, Armin- check the house. Cupboards, mattresses, bags, floorboards. They were reported stealing other things, too,” Erwin said. The two in question nodded, and immediately they began looking around the living room.

At least they weren’t as violent with it as the military police had been.

“How about you tell me what’s going on upstairs then? What’s so bad that we have to starve for you guys?” Levi asked.

Erwin raised an eyebrow, and Levi copied him.

“Oh, don’t act like I’m going to exploit this information. No one gives a fuck about your lives down here, Commander, but I think we at least deserve a reason to why I’ve seen eight children’s bodies get carried off because we can’t feed them,” Levi snapped.

Erwin sighed, a hand running through his hair.

“A titan breached the first wall. People had to be evacuated to the inner wall. We lost all the recourses in that first wall, which was, obviously, crucial to supporting those people. We don’t have those recourses for them in the inner wall,” Erwin said vaguely. Levi rolled his eyes, but pinned that memory for when he could focus on it later.

The two people who had gone off to ransack the place- once again- returned from their bedroom, arms full of books, knives, photos, and the bag of their remaining food balanced between them. Levi’s jaw clenched, and his hands balled into fists.

“So you have been stealing,” Erwin observed.

“Shit observation. His books. My knives. Our photos that you won’t fucking touch. And our food,” Levi said carefully. He eyed the people carrying their things until they set them down on the table, and the girl- he’d forgotten her name- opened the bag. The cloth fell apart to show the remaining pile of rice- the vegetables and meat had been eating first, knowing they’d go off quicker. The stale bread and orange, little spores of mold across its’ peel that Levi hadn’t noticed before, rolled out after it.

Erwin reached for the food, and Levi’s shoulders stiffened. His cheeks burned fiercely.

“That’s the only food we’ve got. That was the first thing we’ve eaten in two weeks. The least you could do is not cover it in your germs,” Levi said. It was as close to begging as he’d ever get, but he knew how precious that shitty rice and bread and single orange was, how it was what could sway a life or death situation down here.

Much to his pleasure, Erwin pulled his hand back before he touched it.

“The bread’s stale,” he commented.

“Still edible,” Levi countered.

“What about the mattresses?” Erwin turned to his comrades.

“There, uh… There aren’t any, sir. There’s a blanket and a few pillows, but the pillows didn’t have anything in them,” the blonde kid said.

“The military mutts burned our mattresses two weeks ago,” Levi said, as if it was a casual conversational piece. “So I’d appreciate it if you went about the couch carefully. Softest thing here,” Levi joked dryly, but the joke died with the constant glare he wore.

“The military police want to give you a death sentence for the trouble you’ve caused,” Erwin said instead, ignoring what Levi had told them. At the very least, Levi could see that his words and appearance were getting to the blonde kid.

Levi shrugged.

“I’m already on a death sentence in here,” Levi snorted.

Erwin let out a sigh, and stepped closer to Levi.

“If you get eye level, I will cut you,” Levi hissed, tilting his head up to glare at the tall man. Erwin smirked down at him, and Levi pondered if he should just cut the arrogant man anyway.

“I did have an offer for you last time,” Erwin said slowly, “but you left before you could hear it. I’ll even extend it to your friends.” His blue eyes flicked to a startled looking Farlan and Isabel.

“Well? Don’t waste time,” Levi urged, rolling his eyes.

“Come with us. Join the Survey Corps. We’ll put your criminal record behind you all,” Erwin said. He leaned forward, putting his mouth just by his ear, and Levi fought the urge to punch him for his proximity, forced himself not to react to the way his skin crawled when he felt his breath on his ear. He’d only ever willingly let Farlan or Isabel this close.

“You get out of here a free man. You get a real bed, real food, hot water. You can perfect your skills. You have potential, Levi. You’re letting it rot down here,” Erwin whispered.

Levi stared right forwards. His eyes flicked to Isabel and Farlan, who looked confused and concerned.

_We trust you._

Farlan mouthed that to him, and Isabel nodded. He knew they did. They’d follow him to death if he told them to. It was stupid that they trusted him so much. He couldn’t make them regret it, at least.

He always did promise he’d get them out of here.

Levi looked to Erwin, catching his eye

“Okay. We’ll join you.”


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rapid chapter updates atm cause I've been hyped to write this and finally have time this weekend! I hope you like it! Feel free to drop a comment if you like it, I love any comments and interacting with y’all!

Erwin seemed pleased with Levi’s response, taking a step back.

“Good choice. We’ll wait outside,” He said, and with that, he turned around, heading towards the door. The rest of the survey corps followed him out, their eyes lingering on the trio. When the door closed behind them, Levi fell into the seat Erwin had pulled out previously, and closed his eyes. Isabel and Farlan hurried over, and Levi grimaced when a set of hands rested on his shoulders. They were going to get their hands filthy.

“Levi! Levi-aniki, did they hurt you?” Isabel asked, and he could feel her eyes looking him up and down. Levi shook his head, his lips turning into a scowl.

“No, but like I said, they made me all but waste the food I just ate,” he muttered disdainfully, cracking his eyes open. “And I got a bit dirty.” He lifted one hand, looking at the mud coating his palm.

“I’ll get you some water,” Farlan said gently, his hand patting Levi’s knee. The affection the two gave him would never cease to be strange, but not unwelcome, to him.

“Does this mean we’re part of the Survey Corps now?” Isabel murmured, and Levi let out a small laugh, looking up at her.

“Apparently so,” he said, nodding. Levi could see it was coming, and before she could lean forwards to hug him, he put a hand on her shoulder to push her back. “I’m covered in filth, you don’t want to be doing that,” he stated.

Farlan returned with the water, and he gratefully took it, washing out bitter taste in his mouth, and then he used the last of it to wash his face and hands. “Get your stuff, then, we’re leaving.”

He left the glass on the table and made his way to their bedroom. Their clothes had been pulled out and obviously searched, but had been folded again and set back down. At least they had manners.

Levi was swift to get changed into a new set of clothes, and pulled his 3DMG back on. He took the brown cloak he had and pulled the hood over his head, and then gathered Farlan’s and Isabel’s clothes and cloaks in his arms. Just as he stood, something fell from the bundle of clothes. Narrowing his eyes, Levi crouched, snatching it up.

It was a simple piece of paper- ripped out of a book- and on one side was the writing from the book, and on the other was a sketch. It was of him and Farlan, sitting in the cavern with the sunlight. Farlan had his arm around Levi, pulling him to his chest with a wide grin on his face.

Levi always knew Isabel had a knack for drawing. He folded the paper up and slid it into his pocket, and walked back to the living room.

“D’you think we can take our books up?” Levi glanced at Farlan and Isabel who were standing around the table of their things. Levi was faintly surprised that Erwin hadn’t taken away the knives the two had brought out.

“Are you going to let them stop you?” Levi snorted, dropping their clothes onto the table. “Suit up, grab your books, and lets go,” Levi said.

Between the three of them, they managed to carry all their books out. Levi had to force himself not to take the rice and stale bread with them out of habit. They wouldn’t need it, but someone else would.

The Survey Corps was actually still waiting for them outside, talking quietly, and Levi turned around to look at the house. It had taken them ages to get this house- fighting the rival gang that had owned the house which was really only used by people who were considered to be the biggest gang. Levi had gotten them to that level of respect down here.

He wouldn’t miss it.

“If you’re ready, we’ll just be leaving immediately now,” Erwin told them. He had lifted the hood of his cloak up over his head also. Levi, with an armful of books and clothes, nodded.

The Survey Corps silently led them through the streets, and eyes followed them the entire way, whispers filling the streets.

_“Did they finally get caught, then?”_

_“No, no- look at them. They have all their shit. They’re leaving. They’re going outside.”_

Levi could hear the envious tones to their words, the glares they got. People didn’t just _get out._ You either got arrested and dragged upside- ironically, it tended to be at night, so you still never got to the sun- or you just, well, never got out. It was simple.

Levi fell into step between Isabel and Farlan, his eyes glued to the back in front of him. Erwin was leading the way, with one woman beside him- she was chatting eagerly to Erwin, though she was obviously holding herself back slightly. The other people, the younger ones, were talking quietly amongst themselves, and as they got closer to the exit, he could feel Isabel buzzing with excitement. She walked faster, ducked her head to hide the growing grin on her face, and the grin spread to Levi. He had promised they would get outside, and it seemed they were getting out quicker than he anticipated.

As they passed another alley, something caught Levi’s eyes- just a quick flash, some random person, probably drunk, in the alley. Except it wasn’t. His blood ran cold, and Levi swore that with the amount of stress he’d put his heart and body through in the last few weeks that his heart was ready to just give out. But nothing happened. They locked eyes, and Levi expected that to be the last thing he saw- those cold, taunting eyes. Of course he’d come back the moment Levi had a chance to get out. But he just grinned at Levi, and disappeared into the shadows of the alley, and no one noticed Levi’s stumble.

“Levi-aniki,” Isabel whispered, “this is it,” she said, and Levi’s eyes flicked back to her. “I told you we’d make it, didn’t I?” Levi questioned and Isabel beamed at him. He knew that her arms full of books were the only thing stopping her from leaping at him in one of her smothering hugs. Levi glanced at Farlan, and though he was more composed than Isabel, he was still grinning softly, and he could see the glint of excitement in his eyes.

The military police were reluctant to let them go, but they complied when Erwin explained they would receive just consequences, and they stood in front of the gate that had blocked them in here for so long. As it began to open with a loud groan, Levi closed his eyes. Soft light pressed against his eyelids, and he opened them when they began moving forwards again.

They had to make their way up a steep hill first that didn’t go well with his shaking knees- it seemed Isabel and Farlan were in the same situation, subtly falling back to look like they were just walking slowly, rather than trying to keep up with the Corps.

The light that illuminated the tunnel out was completely natural and soft on his eyes, even if it felt unnatural to him. He’d gotten so used to candle light or pure darkness.

There were people talking, laughing, and already Levi could pick up on the difference in speech between the people in the Underground and the people above ground. He couldn’t immediately smell ashes or alcohol or filth, and when they reached the top, long moments behind the Corps, all three of them stopped. Ignoring the Corps and people watching them, Levi took in the surroundings.

The houses stood tall and clean, and the stone floor underneath them was clean and not full of ditches and missing stones and dirty puddles. The people around them were clean- women with long hair that looked healthy and silky, and men without scars and bruises blossoming across their skin. The clothes everyone was wearing, simple, not even rich people, wore well made, clean clothes with no dirt or patches or tears in them.

“Levi-aniki!” Isabel gasped, and one of her hands shot out to grip his arm, balancing her books on her one hand and against her chest. “Look!” She exclaimed, and pointed over his shoulder. Levi followed her finger, and there it was. The sky was just getting dark- the moon rising behind Levi now, painting the sky in dark hues of blues and purples, and what Isabel was pointing at was the sun. It hurt his eyes but was dim enough to look at. It was dipping behind the towering walls and houses slowly, and sent gorgeous brush strokes of oranges, reds, and pinks across the skies, broken only by the clouds, tinted with the colours too. They clashed and faded together in the middle of the sky to fade away closer to the moon.

Levi didn’t care if the people watching them saw him with a stupid expression on his face, eyes soft and lips ever so slightly parted. Even the colours themselves were something he hardly saw in the underground, and the sight in front of him was something he’d never seen before.

“It’s beautiful,” Isabel gasped, her hand tight around his arm. Levi wordlessly nodded his head, gaze lingering on it. He took a deep breath in, closed his eyes briefly. The air wasn’t damp and musky up here.

“Are you ready?” Erwin asked, drawing their attention back. Isabel’s hold on his arm fell off, and they turned back. Levi schooled his expression and nodded, following after him again. He couldn’t help but let his gaze go back to the masterpiece above his head.

There were carriages waiting for them, and Levi, Farlan and Isabel were guided into one with Erwin and the talkative woman.

“Where will we be staying?” Levi asked, drawing his gaze from the window and to the Commander. Erwin turned his head to face him.

“We’ll have you moved into a room with other members,” Erwin said, a thoughtful look in his eyes. He nodded subtly, probably to himself, and opened his mouth to speak again.

“We’re in the same room,” Levi interrupted, eyes flicking over Isabel and Farlan.

“If there’s space,” Erwin replied.

“You’ll find space,” Levi told him, and turned his head away to look out the window again.

“Erwin never actually told us any of your names- I get you’re Levi, right?” The girl next to him spoke up, and Levi turned his eyes over to her. She was a tall woman, with dark brown hair and eyes and glasses that strapped around her head to keep them in place.

Levi nodded his head. “I’m Levi, yes. Isabel, Farlan,” he introduced vaguely, gesturing to each person.

The woman smiled enthusiastically. “I’m Hange!” She responded, and held out a hand to him. Levi stared at it for a moment, before hesitantly reaching out to shake it.

“Erwin here says that you taught yourself to use that gear down there, right?” She clarified, and Levi nodded, taking his hand back and subtly wiping it on his trousers.

“I’d love to see how good you are with it once we get to base! I mean, we’ll have to go through training anyway of course, but if you’re already pretty good at it then that just saves a bunch of time,” she rambled. Levi glanced between Isabel and Farlan, looked at the way their cheekbones stuck out sharply and their knees shook when they walked.

“That can wait, Hange. We need to get them settled first,” Erwin interrupted, and for once Levi was glad for the Commander’s input.

Hange deflated, but nodded, leaning back in her seat. “Of course, right, sorry. We’ll get you settled in all nicely once we get in, and you can join us for dinner in the mess hall, get to know some other people,” she said excitedly. Levi placed a hand over his stomach absentmindedly.

“That sounds good,” Farlan spoke up politely, smiling softly. Hange beamed at him.

“Great!” She exclaimed.

The carriage ride didn’t take too long- Hange and Erwin filled them in on a few things, and when they arrived to the Survey Corps base, Levi stared up at the huge building in awe. Was this really where they all stayed?

“Ackerman, Yaegar, Arlert, take their things to the spare beds with you,” Erwin said to the three, and they nodded obediently. Levi was reluctant to hand his things over, hesitating for a moment, but he knew he wouldn’t get anywhere here if he didn’t give these people some minimal trust. And plus, if they hid it anywhere, he’d be able to find it.

“We can get food first, and then Hange will show you about the place. If you’re fit tomorrow, we’ll start training, but I’m thinking it might be best to let you settle for a few days first at least,” Erwin informed, leading the way to the mess hall. While the idea of having to wait to recuperate his health properly infuriated him, he knew that it was the most sensible option. Walking out of the Underground and to the carriages had his legs burning in protest. Not to mention the way his stomach still ached and he could feel bruises on his ribs and jaw forming from being tackled and kicked by the Commander.

Levi’s lips twitched upwards as he glanced at the blonde. He’d spar with him again, when he wasn’t stumbling like a drunkard, and he’d show him really what he was capable.

The mess hall wasn’t full, but it still had quite a few people in it, who all turned to look at the three people the Commander had brought in with curiosity. Levi tried to ignore the prying eyes, and followed as Erwin led them to one end where there was a serving station of steaming food and fair portions that were given to them on plates and trays. It made Levi’s stomach cramp and mouth water, but he glared down at the food. Was this their rations? Was this portion, that Levi could ration out for days, what they considered slim meals? It made Levi feel disgusted, almost killed his appetite completely. Almost.

They sat with Erwin and Hange at an empty table, and everyone dug into their food eagerly. Farlan and Isabel hesitated a second before digging in. Levi had picked up the fork, twisted it in his grip- it felt strange holding it to eat a meal- and was staring down at it. A well stocked plate of meat, vegetables, and potatoes, all steaming hot. He had even gotten a glass of fruit juice with it.

“Levi?” Farlan asked quietly from beside him, and Levi’s eyes snapped to him. Farlan raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you going to eat? It’s hot!” He said, and Levi looked down to the food. He bet everyone else here was that hyped about having hot food, he doubted they realised how lucky they had it.

Levi swallowed dryly. He stabbed at a vegetable he’d never seen in the underground before, and lifted it to his nose, sniffing it before biting into it reluctantly. It left a bitter taste in his mouth and sat heavily in his stomach.

By the time everyone else was done with their food- Isabel and Farlan taking slightly longer as they paced themselves- Levi felt like he’d hardly touched it. What he had eaten felt disgusting sitting in his stomach, as if it might has well been the rotten, filth-covered food in the underground.

“If you’re all done, we’ll take your trays away and Hange can give you that quick tour, then you’re free to go and rest,” Erwin said as he stood up. Farlan and Isabel stacked their trays for them, and Levi looked up at Erwin. “What do you do with the leftovers?” He asked lowly.

A knowing glint shone in Erwin’s eyes and for a moment, they were silent and just staring at one another.

“We throw it out. If it’s completely untouched, we send it for rations,” he stated.

“I want to save this for later,” Lei replied evenly, steeling his gaze and daring Erwin to challenge him.

Erwin glanced down, let out a quiet sigh, and then nodded. “We’ll save it for you, then,” he complied. “Hange, I trust you’re capable of giving them a quick tour of the place,” he said, gathering the trays together and with that, he turned to put away the trays, leaving the new trio with Hange.

Hange leapt to her feet, clapping her hands together. “Alright then, let’s get started!” She grinned.

Hange took the trio out of the mess hall and down the corridor. She gestured to rooms, occasionally going in a couple, and saying what they were for. There was a huge library that took Levi’s interest, and a set of heavy doors led to what Hange said was a lab. There was a lounge where a few people where, and plenty of offices for the higher ups. She showed them where the Commander’s office was and her own, she explained about outside in regards to training areas and such, and then began leading them to their room. Levi’s skin crawled at the idea of sleeping in the same room with anyone other than Farlan and Isabel, and his stomach flipped at the bathroom situation. They weren’t higher ups, so of course they didn’t have their own bathrooms. There were multiple large bathrooms for both the males and females, and the showers were just an open room with multiple shower heads.

The rest of the building was mind blowing to Levi, compared to the housing situations he’d been previously used to. The decorations and intricacies of the building were formal and elegant and candles lined the walls, casting shadows across the walls when it got dark and the full-length windows only let in little moonlight. There was carpeting and art and Levi was pretty sure he even caught a glimpse of a large instrument- some old piano- in an old, unused room on the way past it.

Hange knocked on the door to their new chambers, and then flung it open, stepping inside. There were a few yells of surprise, and people in the middle of getting changed flung themselves under their thick blankets.

“Gosh, so indecent!” Hange joked, hands on her hips and a smile on her lips. “Did you bring their things here?” Her question was directed to the three familiar faces from earlier, and the girl nodded, glancing to the spare beds with their stuff set neatly at the foot of it.

“Oh, good!” Hange exclaimed, and urged the three in. “Until further notice, these three are staying in this room with you lot! I expect you’ll treat them as if they’d been a part of your training regiment from the beginning. We won’t tolerate anything but,” Hange said, a subtle warning behind her grinning lips.

“Yes, Hange!” Came the synchronised reply from everyone in the room, and Hange nodded approvingly. “Well, that’s all for tonight. Erwin will, no doubt, want to talk to you all some more tomorrow, and you might want to focus on getting some rest and real food in you right now. Call me if anyone pisses you off- night! Her words came fast, stumbling over each other, and she gave them a final grin before she ducked out of the room and the door slammed shut.

For a moment, they stood silently, eyes on them, before Levi turned and strode to the three beds. They looked of much better quality than Levi had ever slept on, and they were, thankfully, all together in the corner (though the idea of being closed in in the corner set him on edge- even more so than he already was, anyway.) He fell onto the one closest to the other people, and with his eyes, gestured for Isabel to take the one in the middle.

“Like that’s a smart idea, Levi,” she snorted, folding her arms on her chest. Farlan stood by her, a sheepish grin on her lips as he nodded hesitantly. “I think it’d be best if you took the middle bed, Levi,” he agreed, scratching the back of his head. Levi raised his eyebrows.

“And why’s that?” He asked in an accusing tone. As if he would do that. He had to be the first to any threat, especially if they were in a corner, away from the only exit. There were windows, but they weren’t on the first floor and Levi doubted he’d cope well with a jump or fall from this height with the state his malnourished body was currently in.

The two gave him a knowing look, and Levi rolled his eyes. He knew what they meant, and he knew they had a point. But, still.

Levi didn’t sleep well anyway. He slept much worse in new places, and it took him several sleepless nights in a new place, surrounded by new people, before he could even think about sleeping there. Even if he tried, he would wake up at the slightest sound, and who knew how the other people in this room slept or woke each other up.

The last time someone had woken Levi up innocently- it had actually been Farlan- he had pinned him against the bed with a knife a second away from slitting his throat. Levi had never forgiven himself for that, and he knew it was something he could very well do again, and this situation would be the ideal one for his reflexes to lash out, and that was without the threat of night terrors on top of that, too.

With a grunt, Levi stood up and switched beds, muttering “fine” quietly. At least he managed to convince Isabel to take the bed against the wall. He knew she could take care of herself just fine, but he wouldn’t forgive himself if she ever got taken advantage of in a vulnerable moment. People were too vulnerable in their sleep.

They’d only just begun sorting out their things when someone came up to them, away from the other whispering people.

“I don’t know if you remember my name, but I’m Eren. Eren Yeager,” the boy introduced, and he wore a fierce smile. His eyes were green and his hair similar to Isabel’s colour, and Levi swore that would be Isabel if she’d been born as a male.

“Farlan Church,” he replied with a polite smile, and Isabel sat up from her new bed with a bright grin. “Isabel Magnolia, nice to meet you!” She grinned. Eren’s eyes flashed happily at her enthusiasm, and his eyes turned to Levi, who sat silently.

“And you’re Levi,” he stated. His lips twitched slightly, and he nodded.

“And I’m Levi,” he confirmed. Eren leaned against the wall opposite them, and turned to look at the other people in the room, an eyebrow raised.

“Mikasa Ackerman,” the girl from earlier- he remembered her name now- stood up from her own bed, gave a slight bow of her head. The blonde kid from earlier followed suit, shakily introducing himself as “Armin Arlert.” That kickstarted everyone else, and everyone else was introducing themselves.

“Reiner Braun.”

“Bertholdt Hoover.”

“Annie Leonhart.”

“Jean Kirschtein.” _(And he gave Isabel a sly grin that made Levi instantly dislike him.)_

“Conny Springer.”

“Sasha Braus!”

“Ymir. Just Ymir.”

“I’m Christa- Christa Lenz!”

Levi mentally paired the names with each face, memorising them quickly, before he nodded in acknowledgement. The first person- Reiner- came over, taking a seat on the empty bed across from Farlan’s.

“So, what’s the story with you three? You don’t look like any training corps members,” he commented, and  Isabel nodded.

“We’re not,” she confirmed, and Reiner raised an eyebrow.

“Friend of Erwin’s? From a different district, or something?” He asked curiously. Farlan opened his mouth, and then glanced at Levi. Of course they wanted to check with Levi before giving information away. Levi’s eyes stayed on Reiner, trying to decipher the guy. Something about him set something off in the back of his mind, but other than seeming like a trusted and respected young member of the Survey Corps, Levi couldn’t see anything malicious in him.

“You could say we’re old friends of Erwin’s,” he spoke up, and his lips twitched into a small smirk. He untied his shoes and set them together at the side of the bed- scowled at the dust he could see gathering under the bed- and kicked his feet onto the bed.

“You didn’t seem like friends,” Mikasa said, stepping to stand near Eren. Levi let his amused smirk show.

“Not in the traditional way, I suppose. But I trust I gave him enough entertainment throughout the past- what- two years,” Levi stated. The people who weren’t any of the three people who had been in the Underground were listening curiously.

“Well, now you’re just teasing us- come on, what’s the entire story?” Jean spoke, and Levi had to refrain from glaring at him. If he did try to make any advances on Isabel, he’d be sure to ruin whatever little confidence in his pants he had.

“I pissed off-“

“We met Erwin in the Underground a couple of years ago,” Farlan interrupted with a smile. “After a little trouble with the Military Police,” he said vaguely.

“The Underground?” Conny said, a slight sceptical tone to his voice.

“Yes, the Underground,” Levi snorted. “We lived there, up until two hours ago. Do we not look the part?” He questioned sarcastically. The question brought the fact he was still filthy to the forefront of his mind, and he tensed. God, he needed a shower.

Conny murmured something quietly, but nodded. Levi could all but hear questions buzzing in their little heads now with that knowledge about them, and it was slightly amusing. Not like Levi was willing to indulge them- he was still freshly out of there, and was presented with the knowledge that they chucked away perfectly good food, slept on mattresses like this while their’s were burned, and had more than two sets of clean clothes. And hot water.

“Erwin, Hange, and you- Mikasa, Eren, and Armin- were down there today, because the military police were pi-“

“Annoyed-“

“Pissed off at us,” Levi shot a short, soft glare at Farlan trying to censor him.

“What did you do?” Jean asked curiously, and Levi glanced at his feet. Why did he feel embarrassed for trying to survive? But he knew these people wouldn’t understand the need to steal food, wouldn’t understand the conditions of the Underground. Maybe Eren, Mikasa and Armin might, but they’d only witnessed a glimpse of it, they hadn’t lived it.

“I snuck into their base down there,” Levi said, pursed his lips, “stole some stuff that they’d taken from us in the first place. Also broke one of the officers’ nose,” Levi shrugged, and eyebrows raised in shock around them. “He deserved it,” he said nonchalantly.

“They called in your Commander to deal with us, we had a pleasant conversation about our choices, and I accepted his offer of a place in the Survey Corps. Here we are now,” Levi explained, very vaguely.

“He just offered you a spot?” Jean questioned curiously, and Levi glanced at him.

“Our first meeting was very promising,” he responded, before laying down on the bed. He could feel the exhaustion in his bones, but he knew fully well he could close his eyes and he wouldn’t fall asleep.

“Well, if that’s the case, welcome to the Corps, Levi, Farlan and Isabel,” Mikasa said politely. Levi kept his gaze on the ceiling above him.

“We’ll let you rest. Erwin will want you to rest as much as possible,” Mikasa said. Farlan nodded with a soft, appreciative “thank you”, and with Mikasa’s nudge, everyone that had been more than happy to keep questioning them moved off to their own beds. It seemed they were somewhat tired, too, and were just as happy getting comfortable in bed. Some of them talked in hushed tones for a while, but eventually, everyone’s breathing evened out. Levi sat up against the headboard of his bed, rested his elbow on his knee, and watched the stars outside the window.


	5. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like the story so far, please drop by with a comment or a kudos, it inspires me to keep writing and I love hearing your feedback!
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr @genderfxck-levi if you want to talk!

The large castle that housed the Survey Corps was a naturally loud building. Floorboards groaned and doors squeaked and there were little _tap-tap-tap_ ’s in the walls that Levi told himself were not rats. The people he now shared a room with were irritatingly loud sleepers- not all of them, but too many of them. He, Farlan and Isabel slept completely silently, and tended to sleep relatively still, too. Other people in here snored, moved enough to make their beds creak, one of them muttered in her sleep- Sasha- and Reiner, too, seemed to mutter in his sleep, though not as often as Sasha did. Armin, who was in the bed closest to him, with Farlan the only barrier between them, slept soundly but occasionally let out little puffs of breath or whined and curled up into his blanket. Mikasa slept silently and moved until she was comfortable, but after that, she didn’t do much.

While Levi could certainly sleep in much worse conditions- he fell asleep to the sound of people yelling and fighting for stale bread or getting hammered and passing out in the mud of the streets- and despite the weariness and fatigue aching his body, he knew chasing sleep tonight would be futile. From a first glance, the people he’d seen here were fine people. Reiner seemed a bit odd to him, and Levi knew better than to not trust his gut, and he still held a grudge on Erwin for kicking him into a puddle- twice- and Hange was certainly going to get on his nerves with her energy and enthusiasm, but they weren’t _bad._

It was just that Levi knew better than to give people the benefit of the doubt. He knew better than to put himself into a vulnerable state in strange territory, surrounded by strangers. He had learned those lessons the hard way, and he wasn’t going to repeat those lessons.

So, he spent the night sat up in bed, mostly going over everything that had happened.

They’d gotten above ground. They’d cleared their names of any crimes, and now they had a chance at a life that could be worth more than any other gutter-rats. He could put his skills in combat to good use, and he could make something of himself. He didn’t have to fight every day to survive, he didn’t have to eat stale bread from trash cans anymore. He could wake up to the sun shining through a large window, and he could watch the sun slip away and then watch the moon seize the sky.

Levi tipped his head back, rested it against the wall, and looked out of the window opposite his bed. It was still dark outside, but Levi knew it would be morning soon. He had no idea when the Survey Corps started their day, when people would get up for a shower and breakfast and then go out training, or whatever the Survey Corps actually spent their time inside the walls on, or what this day would bring for him. He knew he should try and eat a full meal today- or the entirety of the leftovers from yesterday, at least- because, now that he could, he should focus on trying to get his body back to peak shape.  He could focus on that first- minus the need for sleep, because he knew he wouldn’t get his customary two-to-four hours of sleep for another night or two, unless he pushed himself enough to pass out or he got drugged- but other than that, he needed to focus on life as it would be from now on.

At the first signs of life, Levi lifted himself off his bed, fixed the sheets, and stretched his shaky limbs out, rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands, and then gently woke Farlan.

“I’m going to shower before the rest of them do,” he informed, and left the rest of the sentence unsaid. Farlan rubbed his eyes gently, blinking against the dim light until he could properly see Levi, and he nodded in understanding.

With that, Levi silently left the room with his clean set of clothes and made his way to the bathroom he was to use. While this castle was certainly grand and a thousand steps up from what Levi was used to, he couldn’t help but be disappointed at the dust and stains he saw. Maybe he could get some decent cleaning in here, too.

His shower was quick, as it usually was, and he took comfort in the hot water, let it relax his muscles, and washed over his body and his hair, using a small bit of the shampoo that was in the holder on the wall. As he towelled himself dry, Levi was disappointed to see the state of his body- exerting himself like he did with little food in the Underground had taken its toll on his body, made his ribs and hips push out against his skin, and at the sight, Levi was just more determined to have a full breakfast, begin getting his body into better shape. The bruises on his side from getting tackled by Erwin were blooming properly now, and Levi could feel the bruise on his jaw blossoming too.

He left his used towel in the basket labelled for the dirty towels, and now changed, Levi returned back to his room.

Everyone was in different states of waking up- some people were standing and stretching, others were sitting and yawning, and a couple of people were pulling their blankets over their heads and flipping off the people trying to wake them up.

“Oh, Levi! We wondered where you’d gone off to,” Eren’s voice brought him his attention, and Levi raised an eyebrow at the teenager. Even if Levi wasn’t much older than the people in this room (with the exception of Isabel and Farlan) it still made him slightly uncomfortable when he realised that these people couldn’t be older than seventeen.

“Erwin brought a uniform for you all- you just missed him, actually,” he said, and Levi followed the boys hand as he gestured to the clothes folded on his bed.

“Thank you,” Levi replied quietly, and he walked over. Farlan was awake, and sitting at the end of Isabel’s bed, trying to convince her to get up. Levi crossed the distance to them, and after he confirmed that Isabel had remembered basic decency and hadn’t stripped to sleep, he tore the bedsheets off her, and poked her in the side, just at the point that made her body jerk.

“Get up, dumb-ass,” he said with an impassive face, ignoring the wide, doe-eyed look she gave him over the pillow she was hugging.

“Levi-aniki!” She whined, sleep still written all over her. Without the blankets over her, she drew her knees up to her chest “I-I could have been naked under there!” She accused, puffing out her cheeks.

Levi rolled his eyes, folding his arms across his chest. “And I knew you weren’t, idiot. You need to shower. You smell like shit, and I’m not going to talk to you if you smell like shit,” he stated. As if his relationship and company meant that much to her, she threw the pillow back onto the bed and sat up, snatching her own folded uniform and glared at the raven-haired man.

“Fine, ass-hole,” she muttered. She stuck her tongue out at him before she left, followed shortly by the rest of the girls who went to shower.

Levi turned to Farlan, who had thrown the sheet back over her bed neatly. “You too. You smell like shit, too,” Levi stated, and Farlan snorted.

“Thanks, Levi,” he said sarcastically, and Levi mirrored his grin with a small smile.

“You’re welcome,” he responded, just as sarcastically, and turned his gaze to the uniform on his bed. He glanced up at the other remaining people in the room- they must have showered at night, Levi assumed- as they were just casually shedding their clothes and pulling on their uniform.

Nudity wasn’t a big deal to Levi. Nudity wasn’t a big deal to anyone in the underground, really. He didn’t much care about the taboo subject of seeing another person naked- really, everyone had the same anatomy in the end.

“Try not to get yourself killed while I’m gone,” Farlan said, snapping Levi out of his thoughts. Levi snorted.

“I should be saying that to you,” he replied, and watched Farlan leave the room with his uniform and a towel.

Letting out a breath, Levi stripped of his shirt, folding it and setting it aside. Before he pulled on the button up shirt of his uniform, he gently prodded around the sides of the bruise on his ribs. It shouldn’t be too bad, and it’d clear up within a week, at most, depending on how his immune system was holding up.

He pretended he didn’t feel the sets of eyes that lingered on his torso until it was hidden under his shirt, and he moved quickly onto his pants. Like expected, the clothes were a bit too baggy on him now, but he expected he’d fill them out soon, and the pants were too long, like every single pair he’d owned were. He rolled them up at the bottom, tucked his shirt in, and began lacing up the long boots he’d also been given. He fastened the leather harness and straps over himself easily, and then pulled the jacket on.

It was a drastic change to the clothes he had only ever worn before, but he liked them, he decided. Especially the boots. He would’ve killed for a pair like these in the underground.

“We’re heading for breakfast, Levi.” When Levi turned around, it was Armin addressing him this time, with a friendly and open smile that threw Levi for a moment. “Do you want to join us?” He asked.

“We also did, kind of, promise the girls we wouldn’t be in the room while they got changed,” Jean spoke up with red cheeks, and a hand cuffed the back of his head. Levi’s lips twitched, and he looked back to Armin.

“Sure,” he responded, even if the idea of being alone with a group of strangers in unfamiliar territory set him on edge. He followed them out of the room, posture high, and he let himself listen to the dull conversation of the other boys. Jean was joking and irritating other people, mainly Conny, but Levi saw how, despite the way Jean poked fun at the others and grinned, there was a glint of something in his eyes- a hesitance, perhaps. A pain from his past holding him back from truly relaxing and letting himself be happy.

He saw how Reiner relaxed most when he was talking to Bertholdt, and how he was overly observant when he thought no one else was watching him. Armin was quiet and timid and preferred to stick to Eren, but he was also open and inviting and friendly, and from the way he spoke, Levi knew that for what he might lack in strength, he made up for in brains.

Conny was short tempered and had a fire in him that Levi knew would undoubtedly get him or someone else into trouble at some point- probably already had.

Eren was too similar to Isabel, physically and personality-wise, though he did seem to have a shorter temper. He was driven with a dangerous fire in him, though his intentions were good, but Levi could tell that despite the intentions behind his actions, his emotions could get the better of him easily and cloud his judgement and he was more likely to lash out rather than be able to hold himself back.

The mess hall was almost full at this time, people trickling in and out as they came for breakfast and finished it, heading off to start their duties. They were given a healthy breakfast on trays, and Levi followed the boys to an empty table, taking a seat at the end. Despite the way the food on the plate made his conscience turn, Levi forced himself to cut up and eat the food in stiff, robotic movements.

“Do you think you’ll like it here?” Armin, to his right, asked him, and Levi glanced up, forcing himself to swallow down the food in his mouth.

Levi shrugged, anxiously twirling his fork between his fingers. “It’s not like I had many other decisions,” he snorted, but felt bad at the guilt in Armin’s eyes. “I think I’m going to get into a shit load of trouble while I’m here, but the people here aren’t bad. Ignoring the whole duty to kill a shit ton of titans, or whatevers out there,” Levi shrugged, stabbing his fork into a section of his waffle.

Armin raised his eyebrows. “Do you know what we actually do?” He asked curiously. Levi repeated his shrug.

“I know you go outside these walls and kill human-eating giants,” he stated. “Have you been out of the wall yet?” He asked curiously, eyebrows furrowing. Armin’s gentle blush answered him.

“Not yet, but Commander Erwin is planning another expedition soon, so that’ll be our first time out the walls,” Armin explained. Levi simply nodded, pondering for a moment. He realised that, he didn’t actually know much of anything about the walls or the titans. It’s not like he went to school in the Underground, or like he thought he’d need to know. He was born in the filth of the Underground, and he expected to die before he could even see these famous walls.

“I have seen titans, though… When they broke into the Shiganshina wall,” Armin said, his voice quieter. Levi faced him again, interest peaking. His curious expression urged Armin on.

“Have you heard anything about the walls? Titans? What happened to Shiganshina?” He asked, sounded all but gob-smacked. Levi snorted, reaching for his glass of water.

“We don’t really get taught stuff like that down there,” he stated, tilting his head to the side and leaning against the table, “if you’re born down there, you don’t need to know anything about titans or walls. You’re never going to see them. I’m a rare exception,” he shrugged.

That was all Armin needed before he took on responsibility for filling Levi in on all this missed information. At some point, the girls, and Farlan, joined them, and Farlan and Isabel listened in curiously.

Titans looked just like humans, and could apparently range anywhere from under five metres tall to sixty metres tall- though the sixty metres tall one was a special case, one called the Colossal Titan who  had been responsible for the invasion of the Shiganshina wall. There was the Armoured Titan, too, another special case. A fair sized titan with more fighting skill and thick, rock like skin covered it, making it impossible to kill. Titans could have their limbs chopped off and they would regrow in a matter of minutes, and they could only be killed if the nape of their neck was cut deeply. No one knew how titans came to be.

Levi had finished his breakfast, the entire tray of it, by the time Armin finished telling him all of this, and all he could do was nod and say “fuck.”

So, this was his new life. Trying to kill these monsters. It could be worse, he supposed. At least he wasn’t rotting away in the Underground.

He took his own tray away, and stood with Isabel and Farlan, dumbly realising that he didn’t know what to do. He was too weak still to properly train, he thought- he still had no sleep and had only had one real meal, realistically- but he wasn’t just going to go and lay in bed for days until he got some energy back.

“I’m assuming Commander Erwin will want to talk to you again at some point, but you should come with us. We have exercise in the morning and sometimes spar. If you’re supposed to be resting, well, at least you can see what you’ll be doing soon,” Reiner spoke up. Levi cocked his head to the side, but nodded. It was much better than standing around like an idiot or laying in bed doing fuck all.

Hange was standing outside, and greeted them with too much energy for this time in the morning, and then set the rest of them off with the task of three laps to wake up, and then to stretch with each other. While they were doing that, she hung back with Levi.

“Are you all athletic kind of people?” She asked curiously. Levi raised an eyebrow at her, and Farlan shrugged in response.

“In comparison to what?” He asked.

“Well, sporty or book smarts, of course.”                                       

“In that case, sports. We don’t need book smarts in the Underground,” Farlan stated softly, and Hange deflated, pouting.

“Damn. Erwin never gets anyone that’s more into science- do you even know how cool studying Titans are compared to just fighting them?” She asked rhetorically, and her entire face and being seemed to light up as she rocked on the heels of her feet.

“Oh! Seeing how they regenerate limbs and act around humans is just so-so- amazing! But everyone here would rather just kill the poor things,” Hange sighed, and Levi exchanged a glance with Farlan. So Hange might be a little odder than they first thought.

“No matter, I guess. I’ll convert you to Titan science later- who’s the best at combat, then?” She asked, and a sly grin spread the brunette’s lips. Immediately, Farlan and Isabel were staring at Levi, and he startled slightly.

“Good, good! Commander Erwin did say you were formidable in your first fight, I’ve been so curious to see you fight since then,” Hange gushed, and Levi sighed, rolling his shoulders.

“I don’t think I should be sparring any of those kids,” Levi stated, and he watched Hange raise her eyebrows. For all he knew, she probably thought he was the same age as them- his young features and height and current physical state didn’t exactly help him out. And anyway, Levi only ever sparred with Isabel or Farlan. He didn’t know how these people sparred, and he wasn’t going to get one of them hurt on his first day here and send himself back into the sunless slums.

“That’s while you’ll spar with me.”

Levi cursed himself for not hearing his footsteps, and he turned around quickly, schooling his features, to look up at the Commander.

“I know you’re not up to full strength yet, that would be dumb to ask that of you after one night-“

“It certainly would be.”

“But you need to keep your skills up, even while you’re resting,” Erwin said, and Levi narrowed his eyes. Because that made sense.  He felt slightly angered at the idea that he’d even let his skills slip in the first place- but, then again, he had. He’d all but laid on his back in the mud when the Survey Corps chased him. He knew he could fight better than that in even worse conditions. Maybe he had let himself slip.

Levi cocked his head to the side. “I’ll spar with you, then,” he said with a nod, flexing his hand. Erwin smiled approvingly.

“Good,” he simply replied, and turned to watch the soldiers just finishing with their laps. Mikasa and Annie had finished neck-in-neck, but Reiner had taken first place. Ymir wasn’t far behind, and Bertholdt finished a second after Jean, and Eren finished a second after Bertholdt, cursing Jean when he rubbed it in his face. Armin and Christa came in last.

“Partner up!” Erwin called out, demanding their attention. “We’re going to be sparring today and practicing combat.” He stated, and immediately, everyone had paired up. Isabel and Farlan had eagerly grabbed each other and found a space when Levi stepped aside, and he ignored the curious eyes that followed them.

“I’ll go over the rules for those of us who are new here, or who have a tendency to forget the rules.” Erwin’s icy eyes sought out Jean.

“No hard hits to your opponent. A tip or brushing past them purposely is a point. No weapons or gear or dirty tricks." Levi want to wanted to scoff. _A points system, really?_

Still, he acknowledged it and forced himself to remember it so he didn’t naturally reach for one of his hidden knives on his body, but he knew he didn’t need to hold back on Erwin. He still wanted to get back on him for landing in a puddle twice.

“Begin!” Erwin called, and then turned to Levi, who had gotten himself into a fighting stance and was assessing the situation in a split second.

Levi knew he was not in top fighting condition. He was strong, yes, but Erwin would probably be able to physically overpower him somewhat easily at the moment. Erwin had height, weight, and strength on his advantage, and the confidence in himself to not regret a move.

Levi had his lack of height he could exploit, as well as his small frame, and his speed and weak points in every persons body. Levi had a lifetime of experience fighting for his life, fighting when his body was shutting down, when he was all but delirious with illness, lightheaded from blood loss, temporarily blinded, and physically outmatched in every way. You never needed to have the physical advantage over your opponent to win a fight.

Erwin struck first- hard and fast, impressively fast for someone his size, but Levi was faster and dodged it with ease, and immediately kicked out at Erwin’s leg. The blonde man managed to dodge it just in time, consequently losing balance, but used that to drop down and attempt to sweep Levi’s own thin legs from underneath him. Levi jumped out of the way, but didn’t manage to dodge the fist that brushed his cheek startlingly close and the hand clasped on the back of his neck, and yanked him down fast enough to give him whiplash.

Levi hissed, but went with the momentum, but before he could slam down on the ground, he reached up and gripped onto Erwin’s arm, and ducked under it just as he yanked it down, and pushed away, thanking his flexibility as he flipped back, landing back on his feet in a crouch.

Erwin composed himself quickly, rolling and quickly getting back to his feet. Levi kept his fists closed tightly, muscles tense and ready to spring. Now he’d started fighting, adrenaline was running through him and urging him on.

Not wait for Erwin to make the first move again this time, Levi leapt forwards, fists up high. He aimed for his head with one fist, and then his stomach immediately after that. He managed to pull back the strength behind the punch just before it hit Erwin’s stomach so it was no more than a gentle pat. Then, he leapt out of reach before Erwin could get him while he was close, but apparently he’d misjudged how tall Erwin was, and Erwin’s hand clamped down on his forearm, pulling him close, and spinning him so his back pressed against Erwin’s chest, one arm pressing along his throat. Not hard enough to cut off his breath, but enough to make it harder.

Levi dug his nails into Erwin’s arm subconsciously, and then he wound one leg around Erwin’s his heel digging into the back of his knee. He moved his hands to grip his biceps, and then jumped slightly, putting his weight onto the back of Erwin’s knee and bulling down on his arms to suddenly topple him over. Levi spun them around mid-fall so he didn’t land under him. He straddled his hip, wrapped his legs around one of Erwin’s, and held onto his arm firmly, locking his wrist.

Feeling confident, he risked a glance around- everyone else had stopped sparring, breathing heavily. They must have finished their first round, and were watching Levi and Erwin with wide eyes.

Levi turned his attention quickly to Erwin, who was watching him curiously. Then, their positions were flipped suddenly, with Erwin stretching his arms out above his head enough to cramp his muscles, pinning his wrists together and keeping him pinned to the floor with his weight.

Despite his best efforts, Levi couldn’t wiggle his way out of the position, and he rested his forehead against the dirt with a scowl.

“You really need to stop shoving my face in the ground each time we fight,” he growled from under him. Erwin finally released his wrists and got off of him, and offered him a hand to stand up. Levi almost just shoved it away, but he slid his hand into his and took his help to stand up, and brushed off the dirt from his clothes.

Erwin smirked slightly. “Better than yesterday,” he commented, “you almost had me,” he said, and Levi raised an eyebrow, trying to decipher if that was smug or not.

“You just really enjoy forcing my face into the dirt,” Levi scoffed, folding his arms across his chest and taking a deep breath.

“Maybe I do,” Erwin said with slight sarcasm. He raised an eyebrow at their audience, and Levi turned to look at them curiously. Then, he turned back to look at Erwin. “Give me a couple of weeks and I’ll return the favour,” he stated, and Erwin smirked.

“Challenge accepted. If you don’t need a break, I’d like to keep sparring with you less intensely. I want to see your style of fighting more,” Erwin said. Levi pursed his lips, glanced to the side. He moved back a step, and into a fighting stance again.

“Only if you’re good for it,” Levi responded cockily. Erwin responded by getting back into a fighting stance.

 

By the time Erwin called an end to sparring, Levi’s hair stuck to his forehead with sweat and his legs shook in protest at the exertion, but he felt exhilarated.

Erwin ran his hand through his hair, pushing it back.

“I’m impressed, Levi,” he admitted with a nod, looking back down at the man in question. “Much more than I was yesterday.”

The raven-haired man rolled his eyes, folding his arms across his chest. “Like I said earlier, _Commander,_ give me a couple of weeks,” Levi said, and Erwin simply hummed in acknowledgement.

“If you’re fine tomorrow, I want to see you with the 3DM-Gear,” Erwin stated, picking up his jacket from the side that he’d taken off at some point. Levi pursed his lips, but nodded. “Maybe do some work with the titan decoys we have. I trust you’ve been informed on anything concerning the Survey Corps that you or Isabel or Farlan were unsure of,” he said, and Levi nodded.

“Armin mentioned an expedition,” he brought up.

“We’re due to do one soon, yes,” Erwin said, glancing upwards, “but we’ll talk more about that closer to the time,” he dismissed. Erwin turned to look at everyone else.

“Alright, sparring’s over! Go shower and get lunch, now,” Erwin called. Every stood at attention, gave a firm “yes sir!” and then began walking inside.

Levi fell into step beside Isabel and Farlan, listening to them argue about who won the last round of sparring between them, before they had to split from Isabel to go into the males showers.

Levi’s skin crawled when he realised he’d be in there with everyone else, at the same time, but he ignored it and played it cool, grabbing a clean towel and folding his clothes once he stripped from them, setting them on one shelf away from the others.

None of the other guys seemed to care about their nudity, though he noticed Armin was much more shy and had a deep blush on his cheeks now, and he had taken one of the showers away from everyone else.

Levi took one also further from everyone else, next to Farlan.

“So, Levi- you never said you could fight like that!” It was Reiner speaking, a bottle of body wash in his hands. Levi turned slightly, raising an eyebrow.

“You never asked,” he stated with a shrug, turning back to the spray of water. Reiner chuckled softly, and Levi almost jumped out of his skin when his hand came down on his back. He had to refrain from whipping around and breaking said hand out of reflex, and he noticed how Farlan watched them, ready to step between them if Levi needed it.

“I guess you’re right in that,” the taller boy laughed, nodding. “Still, I did not expect that to come from you- I mean, no offense, Levi, but you don’t exactly look the most imposing,” Reiner said, offering a sheepish smile. Levi let out a long sigh, closing his eyes briefly.

“It’s better to be smaller in the Underground anyway,” Levi said, turning his attention back forwards, eyes trained on the tiled wall in front of him. While he couldn’t overly remember his mother, he knew she had been a petite woman- in frame and height.

“I’d love to spar with you at some point, Levi,” Reiner said, walking back to the shower head he’d previously been washing under.

“Then we can,” Levi responded, closing his eyes and running his face under the water. After deciding he was thoroughly clean, all dust and dirt washed from his skin and hair, he turned off his shower and grabbed his towel from the side, wrapping it around his waist and leaving to dry himself off and get changed.

He found his way to the mess hall where a large lunch was being served for everyone. He sat down at an empty table with his food, and was shortly joined by everyone else. He ate his lunch quietly, listening to everyone’s chatter and jokes, and after finishing off the soup (he couldn’t bring himself to eat the bread, but Sasha had been more than happy to eat it) he excused himself to go to the library with Farlan, Isabel following them quickly after finishing her soup too.

The library was grand, and encased in dust. People obviously hardly touched most of the books they had here, and it was a damn shame. Levi glanced around the books, and forced himself not to blush. What if there came a time he had to write out a plan, or read crucial information for an expedition? He really ought to learn how to do that, but he couldn’t bring himself to ask Farlan. Instead, when Farlan asked if they wanted him to read to them like old times, Levi nodded nonchalantly and settled in one of the seats.

Farlan picked out a thick bound book, sitting in the middle of Levi and Isabel, and he opened it to the first page. He began reading through it in a soft tone, and Levi focused on the words and watched his fingers turn the pages. At some point when Isabel stopped interrupting Farlan’s reading, Levi found the words relaxing and soothing to him, so much so that he relaxed against Farlan’s side, his eyes drooping closed. It was almost like being at their shitty home in the Underground, and it was safety in familiarity that lulled him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do hope you're enjoying the story so far! I just have a quick question; do you prefer my longer or shorter chapters? My shortest is probably around 2.5K words, while the longest is 5/6K so far, and I'd love to see if you prefer reading longer or shorter chapters?


	6. Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to figure out a consistent posting schedule, and I'm going to try and do two updates a week, so we'll see how this goes!

Levi had fallen asleep for what he guessed might have been twenty minutes or so, head on Farlan’s shoulder, when he realised Farlan wasn’t reading anymore, but talking to someone.

Levi jerked himself fully away, eyes snapping open and already moving to leap to his feet and grab the person in front of Farlan, but Farlan anticipated it, and his arm wrapped around his shoulders and yanked him down and back into his side.

“Calm, Levi, calm,” he said urgently, “it’s Armin, look. It’s just Armin,” he said quickly, and after blinking a few times, he recognised the timid blonde in front of them.

Levi sunk into the seat, cheeks flushing in embarrassment. “Sorry, Armin,” he murmured quietly. “I wake up suddenly,” he explained vaguely. Armin just offered a reassuring smile in return, waving a hand dismissively. “It’s fine,” he assured.

Farlan turned to look at Levi with a soft smile. “You should go back to sleep, Levi,” he said, shrugging his shoulder invitingly.

Levi rolled his eyes, sitting up. “No chance,” he snorted, and glanced at Isabel who was fast asleep on Farlan’s other shoulder.

“What were you talking about?” He asked curiously, and Armin perked up.

“The book he was reading! It’s one I’ve read before and it’s really good. I got excited because, well, not a lot of people read, y’know? We are the Survey Corps after all, but still, it’s nice to see people that like it, too,” he stammered sheepishly. Levi cocked his head to the side, glanced at the book in Farlan’s hand and at the cover. He couldn’t make out the title.

“It sounded good until I fell asleep,” Levi mused, and Armin laughed softly.

“You should read it all some time,” he nodded enthusiastically.

Levi raised an eyebrow at Farlan. “Feel free to keep reading, then,” he said, nudging his thigh with his knee.

Farlan playfully rolled his eyes, but opened it to the page he’d saved with his finger, skimming over it. Armin settled in one of the armchairs nearby with his own book he was holding, and Farlan began reading aloud, seemingly much to Isabels’ pleasure as she smiled in her sleep.

This time, Levi didn’t fall asleep. He almost did, but he didn’t actually fall asleep. He focused on the words Farlan read from the paper, clinging onto the story he told.

Armin stretched his legs and arms out, closing his book and setting it on the table in front of him. He rubbed his eyes and blinked a few times, before standing and taking a few steps towards the door.

“Dinner’s just starting soon,” he said, looking back over at the trio. Levi blinked a few times, turning his gaze to Armin. He sat up, subtly stretching, before he stood up. “We’ll be there in a moment,” he said with a nod of his head. Armin flashed a smile, and with that, he headed out.

Levi stretched his head from side to side, hearing a few cracks come from him as he stretched, and then he stood in front of Isabel, still fast asleep on Farlan’s shoulders.

“Levi…” Farlan drawled, a warning tone in the simple word. Levi innocently raised an eyebrow and his hands, but his lips stretched in a sly smile.

“She should know better than to fall asleep when we have things to do,” he said simply, and Farlan closed his eyes in exasperation.

Levi took that as a sign he wasn’t going to stop him, though, and he leaned forwards, gently taking the girls wrists and putting her arms over his shoulder. She slumped forwards against his chest, and he swooped her up. Immediately, she woke up at that, letting out a sharp yelp of shock and gripped onto the back of Levi’s shirt, kicking her legs out.

 _“Levi!”_ She cried when she realised it was just him, and she let out a long sigh, thudding her fist down on his back.

Levi smirked slyly, walking towards the door. “It wasn’t curfew yet, you should know better,” he simply said, and Isabel curled one hand into his hair, tugging it and thrashing in his hold.

Levi let out a breath, ducking his head. “You could just _ask_ to be let down,” he grumbled, and Isabel’s eyes widened a fraction, just before Levi let go, and she tumbled down to the floor with a thud. Levi fixed his hair with a scowl, and Isabel glared up at him.

“You bully me,” she whined, folding her arms over her chest.

Levi ruffled her hair gently. “You know it,” he said, but helped her to her feet. He turned to look at Farlan, who was watching them with an exasperated expression. He shook his head, but stood up and walked over, standing between the two of them.

“Come on, it’s dinner time,”  he said, and Levi scoffed quietly, but fell into step beside him.

Levi wasn’t overly hungry, his stomach still full from his breakfast and lunch, and when he got it and sat down with Isabel and Farlan, he picked at it, pushing it around the plate and taking a bite from it occasionally, washing it down with a glass of water. Isabel was talking to the other people enthusiastically, her laughter ringing out with everyone elses, and Farlan was talking to Bertholdt with a smile on his face. Levi floated in and out of their conversations, but didn’t pay much attention to them and focused on his food until he got fed up, literally, of it, and went to put it away.

After, he excused himself back to the library alone, avoiding Farlan’s offer for company by saying he wanted some alone time. The library was, thankfully, empty, and Levi wandered around the walls lined with books for a while, fingers wandering over the covers. He picked up one that looked interesting to him- a red, hard covered book that wasn’t too big. He settled on one of the armchairs in the corner of the room, ran his fingers over the cover of the book, and looked at the mess of letters on the back- a “blurb” is what Farlan had called it. A simple description of what the book was about.

It took shamefully long to try and piece together the blurb, and he skipped out multiple words that were ridiculously long. In the end, though, he got the gist, and tried to ignore the shame and embarrassment and frustration that bubbled up in him.

The book did sound interesting, though- it was a book about ‘myths’ and such- ‘Norse mythology’, though he hadn’t heard of it before.

Levi pursed his lips, and opened it to the first page.

He had to take multiple breaks to stop his embarrassment from delving into destructive self-loathing, simply from not being able to read a sentence.

He had gotten onto the fourth page when someone came into the library, and Levi looked up, slightly startled, but he relaxed when he saw the familiar bookworm.

Armin smiled at Levi, looking shocked to see him there for a moment. “I hope you don’t mind if I read in here?” He asked, and Levi raised an eyebrow.

“Of course not,” he responded, and Armin just smiled politely and began roaming around the bookshelves.

“What are you reading?” He asked curiously, a few minutes later. Levi pursed his lips.

“It’s about Norse mythology,” he stated, shrugging, “it’s alright,” he said, and he supposed it was, from what he understood, which was very little. He ignored the fact he’d already missed out half of the paragraphs through the pages he’d read.

Armin nodded his head, eyes scanning a book he plucked from the shelf. “Mythology’s pretty interesting. I’ve read about Egyptian mythology, but not Norse,” he mused, eyes flicking back to Levi.

After that, they fell into silence, eventually lighting candles as it got darker outside and they needed more light to see the pages in front of them. It had been a while, and Armin had switched books- either getting bored with the first one he picked, or maybe he finished it. Levi’s mind was drifting as he looked at the mess of ink in front of him, not wanting to try and understand something by pure force of will, and he cursed himself for getting distracted. He wasn’t sure how other people had learned to read, but he was sure if he just forced himself to look at the words and letters and try and process them, it’d work. Right?

Obviously, though, that wasn’t working, and Levi had to stop himself from throwing the damned book out of the window.

“Are you okay, Levi? You seem distracted,” Armin spoke up once more, from where he’d been sitting since he found his new book. It was in a seat closer to him than the first one had been. Armin’s blue eyes glanced down to the book in his hand, the unread pages to his ride a much thicker side than the left, despite how long he’d been in there. Levi assumed people would be beginning to head to their beds soon, and here he was, unable to read a fucking book.

Levi forced himself to take a few breaths, and looked back up at Armin, tensely nodding.

“I’m fine,” he responded. Armin obviously didn’t buy it, but he nodded nonetheless, eyes lingering before turning back to his own new book. He was almost already half way through it.

Armin, from what Levi had gathered, was a good guy. Shy and hesitant and embarrassed by his lack of physical prowess, but with a fierce intellect and strategists’ mind that could be extremely powerful if he didn’t doubt himself. A friendly and open and naïve kid, easily startled yet Levi could see the fire that burned in him. Armin was a good guy.

Levi ducked his head, his short hair falling across his eyes, and his cheeks burning. He closed his eyes so he didn’t have to look at the taunting, mocking words in front of him.

“I can’t read.”

Armin lifted his head, turning his gaze, now wide-eyed, to Levi. “What?”

“I never learned how to read,” Levi repeated, forcing his tone cold and sharp, because it was better than any of the other emotions he was feeling. He still didn’t lift his head, for fear of seeing pity, or amusement, in Armin’s eyes.

He could hear Armin close his book and gently set it on the table in front of him, and then walk over to Levi, and the chair beside him squeaked as Armin pulled it right next to Levi’s.

“Forcing yourself to look at something you don’t understand won’t make you understand it,” he said, but his tone was soft. He took the book from Levi’s hands without resistance. “My grandad taught me how to read before I went to school. It’s something I remember- coming home and sitting with him on my bed, and he’d read me books and then have me read some parts of it to him. He’d pretend he didn’t understand it sometimes to make me want to read it for him,” Armin reminisced, and Levi really wanted to know his point.

Was he just rubbing it in his face that he got to make memories like that? That he even got to have an education? Levi bristled slightly, glanced up at Armin from through his hair. The blonde had set the book out on his lap, and was turning the pages back slowly until he turned it to the first page, and he brought a candle closer, shifted so that Levi could see the book and the light hit it easier.

“I’ll teach you,” Armin stated, firmly, and he turned to look at Levi with a soft smile on his face. “I’m no teacher, but I’ll try and help you get it,” he said. Levi hesitated, lips parting soundlessly, before he closed his mouth again and lifted his head. He swallowed, dryly, and his eyes flicked down to the book in Armin’s hands. 

He nodded then, after a moment. “Okay.”

 

It got darker, but neither he nor Armin seemed to really care about that as Armin enthusiastically tried to teach him. Levi really had to give it to him- he went through it patiently and explained it as best as he could. Levi had to, begrudgingly, admit that it was much better than how he’d tried to simply will himself to understand it.

Armin, to finish on when he realised how late it had gotten, requested Levi to read one of the pages back to him. Levi tried to shove down his hesitance to do so, and read through the page slowly, eyebrows furrowed, and he blushed when he couldn’t get a word and Armin stepped in, but Armin congratulated him without sounding patronising. He was just genuinely proud of him.

“It’s quite late,” he said, holding back a yawn, and Levi nodded, running a hand through his hair.

“We probably should have finished this earlier,” Levi commented, standing up and rolling his shoulder, “but thank you for staying and teaching me,” he said softly. Armin simply smiled at him, shaking his head.

“It’s no problem, Levi! It took me a while to get any good at it, so- oh! How about we make it a thing? After dinner, we could read for a while, I can keep helping you,” Armin gushed, enthusiasm lighting up his features. Levi raised an eyebrow, but after a moment, he nodded.

“I’d appreciate it,” he replied, and Armin beamed.

“Awesome! Now, we should probably get back- everyone’s probably in bed by now,” he laughed.

Levi gave a small smile and nodded, then followed Armin back to their room.

Most people were in bed when they got there, though not asleep- they were all chattering happily together, and paused when they saw Levi and Armin come in together.

“Armin! We were wondering where you’d went,” Eren commented, and Levi left to sit on his bed near Isabel and Farlan. Armin smiled sheepishly, nodding. “Yeah, Levi and I were reading. We didn’t notice the time,” he explained, flashing a smile in Levi’s direction, and then he sat down next to Eren.

Just like that, they began talking again, laughing and joking with one another. Ymir sat quietly on her bed with a book in her hands, and Annie was speaking quietly to Bertholdt and Reiner. Mikasa was by Eren’s side, and they spoke with one another.

“So you’re a reader now?” Farlan mused, raising an eyebrow. Levi turned his head to look at him. Levi shrugged, began unlacing his boots.

“When have I not been?” He asked sarcastically.

Farlan snorted, “since I’ve known you,” he said with a grin. Levi sarcastically rolled his eyes.

“Some people are just literate, Farlan, accept that I’m one of them,” he joked dryly, and he placed his boots together at the foot of his bed. He began taking off the straps over his clothes and set it on the side table next to his bed, and leaned back against his bed, resting his head on the wall behind him.

“Maybe you can start reading to me then, for once,” Farlan mused.

“I can read you a bed time story, do you want me to tuck you in too while I’m at it?” He asked, and Farlan snorted.

“Only if you’ll kiss my forehead too,” he responded with a smirk, and Levi scoffed.

“You wish,” he snorted, slumping into his bed. He ran a hand through his hair, pushing it back, and turned his gaze out to the window. The sky was dark and dotted with stars, and the moon shone brightly in the sky, slivers of silver light shining in through the oven.

Everyone began to settle down, one by one clambering under their blankets and falling silent. Snores slowly started up from a few certain people, and Levi let out a small sigh. He sat up in his bed, and let his eyes wander over to Isabel and Farlan on either side of him. They slept better here than they did Underground, and he was glad to see them getting some real rest. With the amount of energy Isabel took to function, and Farlan took to deal with Isabel messing Levi, they needed it.

Levi let his head tip forwards, chin nearly touching his chest, and relaxed.

It was at some point, however long later, that whispered talking caught his attention. He hadn’t been asleep- he almost had been, but not quite- and every relaxed muscle in his body tensed, and he had to stop himself from reacting further.

 _“I think they’re fine. They’re just people Commander Erwin saw potential in,”_ the male speaking – Reiner? – commented, and Levi furrowed his eyebrows slightly, and then relaxed his face again, kept his eyes closed.

 _“I know, but we didn’t expect that. And you saw how that one- Levi- fought the Commander. And look at him now- is he even asleep? He didn’t even get changed,”_ the other person replied, and Levi tried to narrow it down. He hadn’t spoken to whoever that was, and it took him a moment longer to identify the voice as Annie Leonhart’s.

_“Yeah, that’s weird, but he’s from the Underground. They looked like they hadn’t slept for weeks when they first got here. So, he’s a good fighter, so what. They’re not a problem, they’re a part of the Corps now, and we trust them as such. Anyway…”_

Reiner’s voice dropped after that, and Levi couldn’t hear whatever he and Annie continued to talk about. Levi relaxed slightly with a quiet puff of breath, continued to breathe deeply as if he was asleep.

Annie had seemed like a guarded person when he first saw her. What Reiner said made it seem like she was just keeping her guard up and wary of them, and Levi could respect that. It didn’t seem like they were talking about anything that should worry Levi, and so he forced himself to let it go. It’s not like he could hear them, anyway.

Levi forced himself to pretend he was sleeping until the sun began to rise.


	7. Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you're all still enjoying this! Some action's planned for soon chapters, and I can't wait to upload that for you!  
> If you're enjoying it, please drop a kudos or a comment, it really motivates me to keep writing and I love hearing all your feedback and ideas! 
> 
> If you want to talk to me further, you can find me on tumblr at @ genderfxck-levi or @ littleburntangel  
> <3

Isabel shovelled her breakfast eagerly past her lips, and Levi grimaced, watching on with horror and disgust. “Isabel, please, pace yourself,” Farlan gasped, his eyes pleading. Isabel ignored him, washing that mouthful down with some water and moving onto more.

Levi wrinkled his nose and looked down at his breakfast. He’d eaten just under half of it, but watching Isabel shovel hers into her mouth was putting him off the rest. He sighed into his cup of water. If there was one thing he missed in the Underground, it was his tea that he’d left behind. Oh, what he’d do for a nice cup of tea just now.

“Isabel, I say this because I care. You’re disgusting, please stop,” Levi _tsk-_ ed, tipping his head down. Isabel rolled her eyes, and swallowed down the lot of food.

“You’re just jealous because I have a bigger mouth than yours,” she stated, and Levi cocked his head to the side, staring at her in confusion.

“I know you do. It’s hard not to know,” he scoffed, and Isabel glared at him, sticking her tongue out.

Levi picked up the apple from his tray, twisted it in his hands for a moment, before setting it back down with a sigh. He straightened his posture, crossed one leg over the other, and looked at Farlan.

“Three meals a day has created a monster,” he said, and Farlan snorted, shaking his head.

“Another two and she’ll be unstoppable,” Farlan responded, taking a bit from his apple.

Isabel opened her mouth to respond, but was cut off.

“When you’re all down, gather in the trees. We’re going to practice with the titan decoys today,” Erwin said, and everyone sitting at the table stopped talking to look at him, sitting up straighter.

“Yes, sir!” They said, and began eating quickly to finish their breakfast as soon as he said that. Erwin’s icy eyes lingered on the new trio before he turned and walked outside, steps thudding gently against the wooden floor. As he went, someone caught up to him, talking leisurely to the commander.

Levi sighed and stood up, deciding he was finished with his food, and took his tray away. He stood by the end of the table until Isabel and Farlan finished their food and put their trays away and scurried back, and then he followed everyone else outside.

Everyone seemed excited to be practicing with their 3DM gear today, and they were excitedly chattering to each other.

“Remember when you ended up upside down on your first try, Eren?” Jean poked with a sly smirk, and everyone else broke into soft chuckling, while Eren smiled slightly and glanced down briefly.

“Yeah, I remember that. But remember that I beat your score the last time we practiced out here?” He mused cockily, and Jean pursed his lips.

“Yeah, but I’ll change that today,” he confidently stated, pursing his lips. Eren’s eyes flashed and he grinned fiercely.

“Challenge accepted,” he replied cockily, and they hurried forwards.

The trees they walked through thinned out into a large clearing, and Erwin was standing there and waiting for them to reach him. To the side were a few tables with a set of 3DMG on it, one for each of them.

“Suit up,” Erwin said, gesturing to the gear, and everyone nodded and scurried over to take a set of gear, helping one another into it. Levi got himself into it swiftly and then helped Farlan with one of his straps, and Isabel stood patiently in her own gear. They were the first ready in their gear.

“You know the drill. There are wooden decoys of the titans spread out within these trees, and you’ve to cut the cushion part of their napes. When all decoys are downed, return here. Don’t take long,” Erwin instructed, and with his own gear, he leapt atop a branch of one of the tall trees so he could see them all easier.

Everyone stood ready in stances, and the Commander pulled a pistol from his belt and let a green flare fly out of that. As soon as it was out, everyone leapt off.

Levi kicked off the ground, sending his anchors flying into a thick tree branch and pulling him forwards, and Isabel and Farlan fell into formation a few feet behind him to either side of him. His eyes scanned through the trees until it fell onto the closest titan decoy- a large cutout of wood, and on its neck was a firm sandbag.

Levi could hear the whizz of other people coming closer, and he ignored his first natural instinct to duck them and fight them. He wasn’t in that situation, he wasn’t a foe of the Survey Corps anymore.

He knew everyone else seemed to consider this a competition and, while Levi himself wasn’t one for competition, he couldn’t help but not want to lose.

Levi took out his blades, and swung abruptly to the right. He pushed off a tree and let his anchors sink into the trunk of a tree behind the titan decoy, and pressed for his gas. At the last second, he twisted his body so he didn’t crash into the titan decoy, and the sharp blades cut right through the ‘nape’ of the decoy. He landed against the tree behind the titan, and after a second, Isabel and Farlan landed on the one beside him.

“That was great, Levi-aniki!” Isabel gasped, and Levi flashed her a grin.

“We’re just getting started. Come on,” he urged, and with that, he pushed off the tree and went flying to the next one he could see in the distance.

While this was a lot different to using 3DMG in the Underground, Levi felt he got the hang of it quickly. Instead of using houses, he was using trees. Instead of running through houses and jumping out of their windows, he was running along the tree branches. Levi glanced over to see Isabel and Farlan still following him.

“Go get the other decoys,” he called to them, “we don’t need our formation here,” he said, and he saw them nod before they disappeared from view, splitting off swiftly.

Levi headed to the one he could see closest to him, and out of the corner of his eyes he could see someone else approaching it swiftly, her red scarf trailing out behind her. Mikasa was slightly closer to it than he was, and, despite what he’d said earlier, Levi felt the rush of a challenge seize him.

Levi pushed his gas again, and sent his anchors sinking in the bottom of the titan’s neck. He saw a flash of confusion run over Mikasa’s face at his action, and she went straight for the nape. Levi spun under the titan and swung up over it. His blades struck through the bag on its neck, and he was swinging out of the way before Mikasa could reach him. He swung to the next tree, and glanced around before eying the next decoy.

“Too slow, Levi!” Farlan called as he sped past, and Levi’s lips parted slightly, before he narrowed his eyes and shoved off the tree again.

“You should know me better, Farlan,” he called back, but he grinned at the challenge his friend posed. Farlan grinned back widely, but kept speeding towards the wooden cut out.

“Get it, Farlan!” Isabel’s voice called out, and Levi sent his anchors into the ground, pulling sharply downwards just as Isabel appeared in his path with a mischievous grin.

“Playing dirty?” He gasped, and twisted, aiming for a close tree before he could slam into the ground.

“How else would we play, aniki?” Isabel taunted, dashing ahead. Levi ground his teeth together, and sped forwards. His anchors thudded into the wooden titan. If he didn’t want to have a real competition with the younger people, well, he couldn’t also hold back on Isabel and Farlan.

Levi ducked his head slightly but kept his eyes trained on the target, and then twisted his body, and kept going until he was spinning and picking up momentum. With a violent slash, he cut the nape and dodged Farlan’s dangerously close blades, and used his momentum to swing around a tree trunk and slow himself down before landing on it. Farlan looked someone shocked, standing on the floor by the titan.

“You ass! I almost hurt you!” He called, and Levi flashed a cocky smile.

“You think you could get me,” he teased, and Farlan glared at him, but smiled slightly.

“One day, Levi,” he said, and Levi snorted softly.

“Maybe,” he joked, and swung off the tree. The fatigue that had weighed down on him had disappeared with the exhilaration from training, and he looked around for the rest of the decoys. Everyone was fighting to get to one of them to his left, and he watched as Eren cut the last one to his right. So, it was just the one everyone was fighting to get to and cut without hurting one another. Levi considered it for a moment before heading over to it, swinging off each tree.

He passed a few people on his race to get there, passing Armin who lingered back out of fear from accidentally hurting someone else in the scrabble to get to it, and there were some people who were too distracted in trash talking their opponents to notice Levi until he was already past them and gaining on the titan decoy. Reiner was the one closest to it, and they caught eyes in a brief moment. Something flashed in Reiner’s eyes, and he flashed a grin to Levi before pressing on his gas.

Levi let Reiner get closer to it as he was coming in from the sides, and Levi was coming from its back. He pushed his gas and embedded his anchors into the tree in front of it. His foot grazed the titan and he pushed off it, the slight jump throwing his balance forwards and he twisted his body with it. Reiner advanced, and he narrowly missed his blades as they both went for the nape, and there was a resounding metal-on-metal screech as their blades clashed. The nape shredded, and Levi’s reflexes bounced him away from Reiner’s opposing blades before they could get anymore tangled. Both men landed on their feet on the floor of it, and glanced to each other.

Reiner laughed. He put his blades away and smiled widely, laughing. “That was a close one, Levi,” he chuckled, glancing back at the shredded remains of the bag.

“Did anybody get hurt?” Erwin’s voice called out over any response Levi had planned, and all eyes turned to the commander.

“No, sir. Just a close call, but Levi here’s fast,” Reiner reported. Erwin eyed the two, but nodded as no one appeared hurt at all. Everyone else watching just looked shocked.

Erwin dropped down from the tree he was on, and he stepped over.

“That was your new record time,” he informed, and everyone gathered closely. Eren grinned widely, nudging Armin beside him.

“There have certainly been improvements since you first came here,” Erwin observed, hands clasped behind his back. “You might really be ready for the next expedition,” he stated, and everyone perked up excitedly, eyes wide at the idea.

“Anyway, we’re going to continue with this until lunch, and then we’re moving back to combat afterwards.”  His gaze roamed over everyone, and then he let his hands fall. “But, for now, let’s focus on using your gear to evade attacks.”

That’s how they spent most of their morning- practicing evading one anothers attacks with their 3DMG, and then they moved onto trying to take out the titan decoys while evading other peoples attacks, adding more and more people. Levi felt slightly afraid that he’d end up lashing out at them out of pure reflex at being chased, but, luckily, that didn’t happen. The only people that got close to him were Isabel and Farlan, for they knew how he fought better than everyone else, and Mikasa got the closest after them.

Mikasa’s skill was impressive, and Levi wanted to see her in a sparring match (as well as Annie and Reiner, they, too, were impressive) but Levi managed to get away unscathed from them. He ignored Erwin’s analysing gaze following him as he swung through the trees.

Lunch came quickly, and everyone wolfed it down ravenously, hardly pausing to take a breath. Levi had to hold back his scowl as manners were thrown out of the window, and paced himself respectfully. He listened to each other either complimenting each others skills or challenging them to a rematch in a sparring match after lunch.

Levi washed his lunch down with a glass of water and took his tray away, and he followed everyone outside again when they were done, walking between Isabel and Farlan.

“How have you been sleeping, Levi-aniki?” Isabel questioned from his right, and he lifted his head to look up at her, quirking a thin eyebrow.

“Fine,” he responded, narrowing his eyes. “Might be better without your snoring,” he shrugged, and Isabel gasped in mock-pain.

“That was unnecessary, Levi!” She exclaimed, and his lips twitched up.

“I know,” he mused, and Isabel slapped his shoulder, puffed out her cheeks.  

“You’re an asshole, Levi,” she said sarcastically, and Levi smiled thinly at her.

“Yet you’re still here with me,” he mused, and Isabel pursed her lips, turned his head to watch where they were walking. Outside, everyone was already pairing up, and Levi took an open spot with enough space from everyone else, turning to face Isabel and Farlan. Often, they sparred at the same time with each other- nine times out of ten, Isabel and Farlan ended up teaming against him- and he was happy enough to do that again, facing the two opposite him and stretching his arms slightly.

“Levi, hey!” Levi focused on his stretch for another moment before turning to face the approaching blonde. Reiner grinned at him boyishly, his hair messed up slightly. “I’d like to spar with you, if you’re up for it. It’s always good to spar with everyone,” he said, and Levi tilted his head to the side, glanced briefly back to Isabel and Farlan who were watching them curiously.

Levi shrugged and stepped forwards. “Alright.” He nodded, and Reiner grinned at him.

“Great!” He took a few paces to the side until they had enough space around them, and Reiner chatted away about sparring until Erwin stepped out of the building and made his way over to him, Hange trailing excitedly behind him. He raised an eyebrow curiously at Levi and Reiner, but seemed curious to see how they’d work out.

“No weapons, no hard strikes,” Erwin instructed, and Levi turned his gaze to Reiner, who had lost his excitable smile and gotten into a fighting stance. Levi let his eyes run up and down Reiner quickly, before he brought his hands up defensively and locked eyes with the blonde.

Reiner struck first, and Levi ducked under the incoming jab, strafing to the side and analysing his stance, the way he held himself and how he fought Levi. Reiner was slower than him, and, like Levi had suspected, he was more confident with his strength rather than speed or strategy, but his strikes were precise and hard and fast, though they left him open for multiple moments as he threw a strike and strafed back.

Levi rocked his weight back between his feet, and he jumped forwards, dodged another jab and landed a strike on his open side, softly, and then spun around his side to behind him. Reiner jumped back and spun around, composing himself. Levi spotted the determined glint in his eyes now, and he ducked under the next incoming fist and twisted out of the well-aimed kick coming his way.

He lunged forwards, kicked his legs back between Reiner’s and, arms around his torso, he pulled forwards, jutting his hip out and pulling Reiner down and to the ground. His hands leapt to Reiner’s wrist and he held it, twisted it at a certain angle, and put slight pressure on it that made Reiner jerk on the floor and let out a small gasp. Levi took that as a sign and let go, standing up and offering a hand. Reiner took it after a few moments, and let out a small chuckle.

“I didn’t expect that,” he stated, and Levi glanced to the side briefly.

“Most people don’t,” he replied, and Reiner laughed again.

“You got me fair and square,” he said, waving his hands. Levi raised an eyebrow.

“Round two?” Reiner asked, a sly smile spreading itself across his lips. Levi tilted his head back to get eye contact. He slid back into a fighting stance, and Reiner beamed.

They spent a long time sparring, going through rounds together and Reiner managed to get the slip on him a few times and win a few rounds. They were dismissed for dinner later, and everyone eagerly ran back into the mess hall to devour a steaming bowl of soup and vegetables. A few hours after dinner was spent still sparring, but more so teaching each other and learning more ways to defend and attack. People wanted Isabel, Farlan or Levi to teach them something, but Levi managed to get out of teaching anyone something. He wasn’t a teacher, and the thought of teaching someone something he’d also been taught, but in a completely different situation, put a heavy feeling in his stomach.

By the time Erwin dismissed him, Levi felt utterly disgusting with how much he had sweated, dehydrated, and exhaustion that was bone deep. Everyone headed to the showers in quiet agreement, chatting much more quietly and infrequently on the way there, intent on getting in, washing, and getting to their beds. Farlan spoke briefly to Levi, saying how he noticed how much Isabel had improved in her combat over the years, and himself, and Levi couldn’t help but smile at the thought. God, when he’d first met the two of them, they couldn’t fight for shit. Even if Levi was fiercely protective of the two of them, he knew fully well they could protect themselves and then some, though the thought that they’d need to protect themselves against some danger that Levi wouldn’t be able to protect them from made his stomach lurch.

Levi had never expected to grow close to those two. He’d been taught not to make friends, and he knew that friends could be dangerous down in the Underground. He hadn’t befriended them on purpose, but the situation he’d met them, separately, had made him feel responsible for them, and now he couldn’t imagine life without them. Levi tried not to remember those situations.

Everyone filed back into their bedroom, getting changed into whatever they slept in, and clambered under their bedsheets, chatting quietly. Everyone fell quiet slowly until the room was silent, voices being replaced with soft, rhythmic breathing and an occasional small snore, and even Levi had to admit he was on the edge of falling asleep.

It’s because someone left the window open and the room was uncomfortably cold, Levi told himself when he stiffly pulled the blankets of his bed over himself for the first time. Not because he was actually tired and longed for sleep, even if the idea made all his muscles tense and his heart begin racing. For a few hours, he sat like that in bed. Huddling under his bedsheets, listening to everyone fast asleep, until his body relaxed slowly and he subconsciously shuffled down until his head fell onto his pillow. If he was going to stay awake, he might as well get comfortable, he told himself, fully knowing he was lying to himself. His eyes began to droop and close, and he fell asleep to the sound of Isabel’s snoring to his side.


	8. Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long one today! Leading up to their first outing soon!

 

_Levi stumbled through the mud of an alley, his legs crying out in protest with each step. The mud under his worn shoes made each step more treacherous, and he had already slipped once and covered himself in the cold muck. He clutched his arms to his chest, his wrist throbbing from when he’d tried to catch himself when he fell, and his breath left his chapped lips in puffs, rising up into the sky and disappearing. He couldn’t tell where he was now, he’d taken too many turns down random alleyways and his eyes narrowed against the darkness surrounding him. Behind him, footsteps thundered through the mud, chasing after him with loud laughter invading his ears. He knew they were playing with him, knew they could catch up to him at any moment, but they preferred to chase him like prey._

_Levi turned right, followed the alley, and abruptly slammed into a wall and crumpled to the floor. A dead end, taunting and mocking, greeted him in the form of a towering, crumbling wall, moss clinging to the stones and water dripping down it, creating the large puddle in the mud at its’ feet._

_Levi tried to get back to his feet, and it took him many attempts to get up, his feet sliding in the muck, his head spinning, his hands trembling from the cold and exhaustion. Mama hadn’t woken up, again, and he knew she didn’t like him going out on his own, but his stomach was so empty it hurt and by the way her skin was stretched taught over her sharp cheekbones, he assumed her stomach hurt too._

_He had only wanted to get them some food- maybe she’d wake up if she smelt it- and a group of men had recognised him from his mother and at first he thought they would help him, find him some food to bring back to his mother, but they were more interested in seeing the way tears welled up in his eyes when they tugged his hair and how he spluttered when they pulled his head back out of the puddle._

_He had managed to get the slip on them and sprinted down an alley, hoping they wouldn’t care, hoping they’d just leave him be, but they, apparently, had the exact opposite of intentions. He could hear them again, no longer running, knowing that he’d run right into a dead end. One man was whistling, an eerie, mocking tune, and Levi clamped his hands over his ears, squeezed his eyes shut and willed them away. The mud that clung to him and his clothes- a shirt of his mothers, actually, because she couldn’t afford to buy him his own clothes and he was small enough to wear hers like a dress- chilled him to the bone, and flashes of his mother appeared behind his eyelids. Laying at home with the blanket Levi had thrown gently over her, her eyes sinking back into her face, her skin cold and constantly unresponsive in her deep sleep._

_As the men rounded the corner, laughed at the sight of Levi in the corner, he wished his mama would wake up now, that she’d come around the corner after the men and take him home, cuddle him to her chest and sing him to sleep like she used to only a few weeks ago, before she’d gotten too tired and cold._

_That didn’t happen, though, and it was one of the men that grabbed him like the runt of a dogs litter, laughed in his face and then spat on his cheek. He blocked out the words they yelled to each other and at him, but he couldn’t block out the hands, grabbing and twisting, punching, pulling, yanking and scratching, dirty boots cracking his ribs and forcing the air up and past his lungs. They wiped his tears with their booted toes, and when he cried “mama” they laughed and said she didn’t care about him, that she wouldn’t save him and he was all alone. They said he looked like his mama, and they wondered if he was good at whatever job his mama did- Levi didn’t know what his mama did for money, but it made her tired and she worked hard for him, and he was proud of her._

_They laughed at that idea, grabbed his hollow cheeks and pushed his lips out, and said he looked just like his mama when she was on her knees. He didn’t understand that, but if they were insulting his mama, he wouldn’t have it. When he glared at the men, they laughed and slapped it off him. He tried to fight them and they held his face to the mud and in the water, and he cried out for his mama again when his chest burned and they laughed, but she wasn’t coming._

Levi still couldn’t breathe. It had been years, and he still couldn’t breathe. The hands holding him on the floor turned to tangled bedsheets, tying his legs together, and the cold muck and water turned to the sweltering heat of his body and the sweat sticking his hair to his forehead. He wanted to open his eyes, but he couldn’t look away from the memory of his mother against his eyelids, how she looked in pain even when she slept- no, when she was dead. He hadn’t known it at that moment, but he realised it only days after then. He’d spent days trying to wake her up.

He jerked his body up, a cry of “ _mama, please”_ dying on his lips instead for a search for air, and his hands shot up. They tore the blanket from his legs, threw them onto the floor, and pulled himself into a sitting position as he gasped, air whistling through his constricting windpipe and into his burning lungs. He coughed, trying to expel phantom water from his lungs, and his eyes cracked open and shattered the image of his mother. Wooden ceilings and walls greeted him, and the sound of snoring from around him. Immediately, he was looking at everyone around him, taking in the sleeping bodies, minus for two, though he only noticed one.

He ignored how Farlan was already half off his bed, obviously just getting up to reach him in his nightmare, but Levi woke up too early. He ignored the concern in his eyes, and appreciated that he didn’t press him or come closer. The second person watched through slightly open eyes, keeping her breathing even and rhythmic.

Levi dropped his head into his trembling hands, ran them through his sweat-soaked hair, and wheezed air into his lungs slowly, forced his ribs to relax. He wasn’t a four year old with his head held into a puddle, obliviously thinking his deceased mother was just asleep. He wasn’t that innocent kid anymore, and he had to get over it. He couldn’t cry _mama_ when there was a small inconvenience. He had to get a grip on himself.

He fisted his hands in his hair, tugging the dark strands lightly as anger and humiliation at himself washed over him. He wasn’t a stupid, naïve, weak little child anymore. He couldn’t bring himself to tell himself to get over his mother, though. With anyone else he would simply forget them completely, but the guilt that bubbled up in his chest at the mere idea was overwhelming. He wasn’t weak anymore, but his mother deserved more than to be forgotten.

Levi screwed his eyes shut, took in a wavering breath through his teeth grinding together, and opened his eyes again. _Get it together,_ he hissed to himself, and after many long moments he loosened his painful grip on his hair, letting the sweat-dampened strands slip from his trembling fingers.

Levi tipped his head back, looked at the high ceiling and forced himself to breathe slowly despite the way his lungs pushed painfully against his constricting lungs. When he could breathe again and didn’t feel so light-headed, he sat up and silently left the room as quickly as he could.

The castle was eerily quiet, and Levi wasn’t sure if that made him relax or put him more on edge.

Levi made his way down the corridor, his steps silent on the wooden floor, and he paced up and down the corridor, hesitant to stray and loiter around the place. It wasn’t long until the bedroom door opened and Farlan stepped out, glancing around before finding Levi.

He walked over quietly and when Levi slumped against the wall, Farlan did as well. Levi kept his gaze on the floor by his bare feet, and if he weren’t still trying to calm himself down, he’d be cringing at the amount of dust and dirt and germs on the floor where he stood.

“It’s cold out here,” Farlan commented, eyes flicking briefly to Levi. Levi didn’t respond to him. “How about we shower and head down to the library, or go sit outside?” He offered. Levi pressed his lips together, and began nodding his head before he glanced back to the door.

“Isabel,” he murmured, voice quiet and croaky.

Farlan tilted his head to the side and gave him a soft smile. “She’s a big girl, she can take care of herself. We’ll be back up before everyone else wakes up,” he coaxed gently, and a quiet sigh left Levi’s lips. He nodded eventually, and Farlan held the door open for him when he trudged back inside.

He gathered his uniform in sluggish movements, and Farlan followed after him, moving quietly to not wake anyone else up. The two trudged to the bathrooms and Levi closed his eyes against the soft spray of hot water that was just too hot to be comfortable, but it felt better than any puddle of gutter water.

Farlan waited until Levi finished showering to finish too, silently comforting him with his presence and while Levi didn’t acknowledge it, it was somewhat comforting. It kept him grounded and gave him something to focus on rather than the lingering feeling of hands on him and the slowly-fading imaging of his mothers skinny face.

The library was warm with the dying embers of the fire still crackling quietly away, and Levi ended up throwing more wood onto it before he settled onto the soft couch beside Farlan. Farlan had retrieved a book from the table and opened it to the first page. _“In Jotunheim, the home of the giants, is Mimir’s well…”_

Levi slouched into Farlan’s side, watching as the fire took off across from them and listened as Farlan began reading the tales of _Mimir’s Head_ and _Odin’s eye._

Farlan’s voice was soothing and relaxing, soft and deep and literate as he confidently read from the book, even when he read through words that looked like a mess of letters in a different language. It was comforting, his presence and the flickering soft glow from the fire and Farlan’s voice, and the tension from his shoulders slowly ebbed away.

Farlan let out a slow breath, and gently closed the book. “I should probably leave some for you and Armin, if you guys are starting a little book club together,” he commented, and Levi blinked slowly, turning his eyes to rest on the blonde. He stifled a yawn, his lips turning up slightly, and he nodded.

“Probably,” he chuckled quietly, sitting up and stretching his arms and legs out. Slowly, he heaved himself to his feet and rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hands gently. Farlan set the book on the table in front of them and raised his arms above his head, a quiet crack coming from him as he stretched.

“Time to force Isabel awake?” Farlan asked, raising an eyebrow. A small smirk spread his lips.

“Of course,” he nodded.

It was still early- early enough that no one was awake- or at least they didn’t run into anyone- but the sun was slowly rising and soft rays were beginning cast into the castle.

Levi opened the bedroom door silently, sliding inside and making his way through the beds to the one at the end where Isabel’s head just poked out of her blanket. He could already hear her snoring from here, and when Levi reached her bed, he reached out and grabbed her upper arm, firmly shaking her. He crouched down so he was eye level with her on the bed. Isabel’s eyes shot open but upon meeting Levi’s dull ones she relaxed, slumped back into her bed and let out a long sigh.

“Get up,” Levi ordered, keeping his hand firmly on her arm. A high pitched whine left the girls lips, and she just screwed her eyes shut tighter, trying to shake his hand off.

“Let me sleep, Levi,” she grumbled, turning her face into the pillow. Levi rolled his eyes and stood up.

“No. Get up,” he repeated, stepping back and pulling her up. Isabel let out a small yelp of surprise and gripped the bed with her other hand, throwing her weight back.

“Levi! Stop bullying me!” She cried out, gritting her teeth as they fought against each other. Levi let out a small scoff, yanking her arm up and pulling her forwards, upper body off the bed.

“Did you shower last night?” Levi asked suddenly, narrowing his eyes on Isabel. She stopped fighting against him so much, cheeks flushing, and she gave him a soft grin.

“I was tired,” she said, tone wavering. Levi wrinkled his nose in disgust, turning his face away and letting go of her arm.

“You smell horrible,” he stated, and Isabel just grinned at him, finally sitting up in bed and letting the bedsheet fall off of her.

“It’s called Levi repellent,” she replied, and Levi frowned.

“Well, it works for everyone else too, apparently. Go shower, you rat,” he sneered, and Isabel stood up, walking over to Levi and throwing her arm around him, running her hand through his hair and playfully ruffling it.

“But you love this rat,” she teased. Levi rolled his eyes, plucking her wrist up and ducking out from under her arm.

“Debatable,” he muttered, stepping back and wiping his hand on his pants.

Isabel just grinned goofily back at him and grabbed her uniform, scurrying from the room. Farlan, who had been standing a few feet away from them, was smiling softly in amusement and shook his head gently. Levi just shrugged.

Around the room, everyone else was waking up and waking each other up, chatting tiredly and pulling on their uniform. Mikasa was standing beside Eren’s bed, expressionless save for the slight smile she saved for Eren and Armin. Her eyes flicked away from him when he looked over, and Levi pretended to ignore it. Armin was sluggishly pulling his uniform on and occasionally piping up on Mikasa and Eren’s conversation. Sasha grumbled as Connie tried to convince her to get up, and Reiner and Bertholdt were talking happily, and Annie was watching them quietly as she made her bed. Levi turned his gaze to the window and the cloudy sky outside. Being able to look out of a window and see that still felt unreal to him, and he wondered if he’d ever get used to it.

“Let’s go get breakfast,” Levi said, turning to Farlan. He had light bags under his eyes and Levi felt guilt bubble in his chest for waking him up, but Farlan smiled and nodded, resting a hand on his stomach.

The hallways were busy with people heading to the mess hall or running errands and they received some curious glances from some people who probably didn’t even know they had new comrades. The situation was still odd to Levi- the sudden shift in lifestyles. His stomach turned and felt uncomfortable, unused to the steady amount of food he was eating now, and his body hadn’t gotten used to the real day-night schedule completely yet. He wasn’t used to staying in a building with so many people and having to relax himself when he was in the mess hall, surrounded by other people. The idea that no one around him were plotting to murder him was strange and unsettling. He almost preferred being able to trust the danger of the underground more than this unfamiliar situation.

Farlan’s hands brushed over Levi’s arm, pulling him out of his distrustful thoughts, and he focused on making his way to get breakfast even though he wasn’t particularly hungry. He looked down at the food on his tray and scowled at it, setting it down on the table in front of him.

“It’s weird having this much food, isn’t it?” Farlan commented and Levi glanced up at him before back down at the food. He nodded minutely, letting out a breath.

“Definitely,” he muttered, “all this food and they don’t even have any tea,” he added, shaking his head and huffing. Farlan’s lips twitched upwards slightly as he watched him.

“They probably have somewhere,” he said, and Levi shrugged.

Levi picked up his cup of water, swirling it gently and scowling into it. What he’d give for that to be tea in that cup instead.

Levi picked at his food as people slowly joined them with their own trays of food, talking happily to each other. Some people were more quiet today, slowly eating their food and keeping to themselves, looking tired.

Levi plucked a strawberry from his plate and rolled it between his fingers, eying it as if it was suspicious. Just as he brought it towards his lips, a hand slammed down on the table making everyone jump, and Levi dropped the strawberry on his lap, hand clenching defensively into a fist. He forced himself to relax when he recognised Hanji standing there, a grin on her face.

“Eren!” She called, making all eyes flick between the odd woman and Eren, who had a blueberry perched between his teeth, looking like he’d just been caught red-handed. He swallowed the berry down.

“Uh… Yes, Hanji?” He asked hesitantly.

“Come, come! We need to speak to you!” She urged, taking a step back from the table and looking expectantly from him. Mikasa’s eyes narrowed protectively, but Eren slowly stood, scurrying off after Hanji.

Armin shuffled his chair closer to Mikasa and they spoke together quietly, Armin weaving words to calm Mikasa. Levi had noticed that about her- she was much too protective of Eren, and seemed suspicious of anyone that wasn’t an immediate friend or had passed one of her million of tests for her trust.

Levi picked the strawberry up from his lap and scowled at it, putting it back onto the tray.

“She’s crazy,” Farlan murmured from beside him, and Levi scoffed quietly.

“Completely,” he agreed with a nod and a snort, before getting to his feet and taking his tray away. Though he was curious as to why Eren had been whisked away by Hange, but he pushed aside his curiosity and turned back to Farlan. Isabel had joined them and had sat on Farlan’s left and was focused on her food. Levi wondered how her stomach hadn’t exploded yet. He didn’t give it long, anyway.

Levi clapped his hand on Farlan’s shoulder, making the blonde jump slightly, but he turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow.

“Old time sparring match?” Levi asked. A small smile spread Farlan’s lips and he nodded. He finished his water quickly and took his tray away before he hurried back to Levi.

“Join us once you finish stretching your stomach,” Levi told Isabel, who simply replied with a mumble around her mouthful of food.

Farlan followed him outside and began stretching quickly. He turned to face Levi. “Weapons or none?” He asked, and Levi cocked his head to the side, pursing his lips in thought.

“Surprise me,” he replied, and a slow smile spread across Farlan’s lips.

“Well then, Mr. Armsman, give me a knife in-case I want to use it,” Farlan said, holding a hand out expectantly. Levi hesitated for a moment before one hand dipped down into one of his boots and he pulled it out. He flipped it around so he held the blade between his fingers and set the hilt in Farlan’s hand, and he slid it into his own boot with a thankful grin. Then he stepped back into a fighting stance, and Levi copied him.

Levi swung first, precise and swift, but Farlan strafed back just in time to dodge it, countering with a quick jab of his own and following it with a kick. Levi threw his hand out to catch Farlan’s ankle, stretching his leg out and throwing him off balance.

Levi watched Farlan momentarily struggle and panic before he gritted his teeth together and angled his hips. Levi watched him curiously, raising an eyebrow and just as Farlan jumped, twisting around swiftly to try and kick Levi with his other foot, he let go of his leg and ducked under the incoming kick, pushing his leg away and throwing off the blonde’s balance.

A small yelp left Farlan’s lip, sounding much alike a puppy, and he caught himself as he tumbled, quickly jumping back to his feet.

“Faster, Farlan,” Levi hummed, and Farlan furrowed his brows at his teasing grin.

Levi jumped forward, aiming for his stomach with one hand and the other going for his head. His fist caught his side and his other hand wound into his hair gently but firmly, forcing him to stumble to him when he pulled him forwards. Levi pushed his foot against the back of his knees and followed him to the ground, straddling his hips and moving his hand from his hair to his wrists, pinning them to his sides. He watched Farlan think, strain against his hands, and then he bucked his hips violently, turning and wrenching his hands from Levi’s.

Levi pursed his lips when Farlan pulled the knife out of his pocket and placed it carefully against his throat. “Good timing,” he commented, pushing his head back and away from the sharp blade. It was refreshing to be able to actually spar, to spar like he used to, without some dumb points system and constantly holding himself back so he didn't actually hurt anyone. He knew Farlan would never actually hurt him, but they pushed one another. They trusted each other to not actually hurt them, but knew that they could and they weren’t afraid to leave some bruises if it encouraged them to progress in their combat.

Unlike, apparently, everyone else that sparred here. “But predictable,” he added on, pulled one hand from his grip and pushed his hand back, quickly sitting up and fighting with him to push the knife away. Levi pushed Farlan off of him and the two scrambled to their feet. Levi jumped out of the way of Farlan’s swipe of the knife and then rushed forwards again, countering a strike with his own and ducking behind him. He clutched his knife hand in a crushing grip, forcing it to his own neck, and forcing his other hand to his back.

For a few moments, Farlan struggled, trying to twist his way out of Levi’s grip, but he stilled and let out a sigh eventually when he realised he couldn’t get out of it. “Alright, alright, you win,” Farlan sighed, slumping against his chest.

“Care to explain what’s going on here?” Levi’s eyes flicked up, finding those of the commander staring back. Behind him were two people Levi vaguely recognised- from the time he first met Erwin, and they had been with him then. He could see they were tense, ready to fight, but didn’t act upon it unless Erwin said so.

Levi let go of Farlan’s hand, letting him put the knife away from his throat, but kept his arm draped over his shoulders and holding his other arm behind his back.

“Just a little sparring practice, Commander,” Levi shrugged, and a sideways glance at Farlan showed him grinning sheepishly at them.

“We don’t spar with knives her,” Erwin commented, gesturing to the one still held in Farlan’s hand.

“We do,” Levi replied. Finally, he let go of Farlan completely and stepped to his side, fixing Erwin with a disinterested expression.

“These are the new guys?” One said, cocking his head to the side and looking them up and down, the one with his hair in a small bun.

“You might remember them from a while ago,” Erwin said, inclining his head slightly. “Levi, I want you to work with my Special Operations Squad for the next few days. Get to know them, how they work, work like you are in that squad.”

Levi raised an eyebrow at him, eyes flicking between the two people either side of the Commander. “Why?” He asked, narrowing his eyes. “I was already getting so close to the kids I’m sharing a room with,” Levi huffed out a sarcastic sigh.

“I’m sure you were,” Erwin said, minutely shaking his head. “We’re going outside of the walls soon. I’ll be watching you and Farlan and Isabel to decide how best to put you in,” he explained. Levi shared a glance with Farlan before he looked back at Erwin, tilting his head to the side.

“An expedition,” he assumed.

Erwin shook his head. “Not yet. A simple mission outside of the walls,” he replied, “but it’s still important that we find where you’d be best.”

“And what about Farlan and Isabel?” Levi questioned.

“Like I said. We’ll be figuring out where is best for them in formations,” Erwin repeated with a nod. Levi pursed his lips, thinking over it before he decided he didn’t really have a choice.

“Whatever, fine,” he shrugged, and Erwin briefly bowed his head in a silent thanks. He turned to the two people either side of him, gesturing them forwards. “Eld, as first in command of the special operations squad, I trust you’ll make Levi feel at home,” he said, raising an eyebrow. The man- Eld’s- eyes flicked down to Levi briefly.

“As long as he’s cooperative, of course,” Eld mused, but he jerked his head back slightly. “Come along then, Levi.  We have a busy few days.” With that, Eld began walking past them, the short girl that had been quiet so far flashing Levi a smile before following Eld.

“Tell Isabel I’ll see her later,” Levi told Farlan, ignoring his small look of concern at the idea of leaving Levi alone, gently patting his arm before following the two. As he chased after the two senior soldiers he heard Erwin call for Farlan, and when he glanced over his shoulder the two of them were walking inside again.

“I’m Petra.” The woman was suddenly by his side, matching her steps with his. Levi glanced her over but decided to entertain her.

“I’m sure you already know my name from just then. Levi,” he replied, turning his gaze forwards.

“Commander Erwin did mention it,” Petra said with a soft chuckle. “I’m sure you’re curious about our squad,” she commented. Levi shrugged.

“Only as curious as I need to be,” he murmured.

“I can see why Erwin likes you. You’re interesting,” she mused, “you’ll meet the rest of the squad today I’m sure. Like Eld said, we have a busy few days. I hope you can keep up,” she joked. Levi glanced curiously at her but kept his mouth shut, glancing around them.

They were heading towards the stables that Levi had spotted since his stay, and Eld turned to look at Levi once they reached it.

“Ever ridden a horse?” He asked, leaning against the building. The horses stuck their heads out to look at the trio, pawed the dirt and let out soft whinnies.

“Ever seen a horse in the Underground?” Levi replied sarcastically, but let out a sigh. “No,” he added, glancing up at the large animals. He had seen them when the Military Police carted between the Underground and above, or when the patrols decided to go on horse.

“Hope you pick up quickly, then,” Eld mused, strolling down the line of stalls. “Our horses here are the best you could get. Strong, fast, braver than some soldiers I’ve seen here,” he stated, and came to a halt in front of one stall. The horse inside was slightly shorter than the others but lean and toned. Its dark eyes were narrowed and it flared its nostrils when they came into its view.

“This one here’s been a trouble. Doesn’t like anyone, people can barely get close to it. Let’s see if you can get to it,” Eld mused. Petra was giving him a warning look, but said nothing. Levi raised an eyebrow but stepped forwards to the stall, looking at the dark mare.

“What’s its name?” He asked, unlocking the door but keeping his hand on it.

“Doesn’t have one. Whoever rides a horse gives it a name, but no ones ridden her for long enough.” Eld leaned against the wall, arms folding across his chest. He was watching Levi with a curious expression, an underlying mocking look to it that made Levi’s blood boil. He’d tame this fucking horse even if he’d never touched one before.

He opened the stall and stepped inside, eyes glancing briefly at the bridle and lead rope on the wall before back to the horse. She’d stepped back and away from him, her tail swishing and muscles tense.

He tilted his head to the side, slowly taking small steps to her. “Seems people don’t like you much,” he said, watching the horses’ ears twitch, “and, personally, that’s fair enough if you’re being a bitch to them. You’re the first horse I’ve actually gotten close to, so I’m trusting that not all horses are like you.” He spoke steadily, his voice calm and confident. The horse pawed the ground and stomped on it, lifting her head high and staring him down.

Levi spread his fingers out, looking away briefly. “I’m not looking forwards to working with you,” he stated, and he held out his hand for her to smell, which she did so after several moments of hesitation. When she didn’t react badly, he reached out, first stroking down her nose, and then her neck. He ran his hands down her side for several moments until he thought she was calm enough.

He took the lead rope from the wall and walked back to her, taking his time to slip it over her head and then lead her out of the stall. Then, he turned and look at Eld and Petra, raising an eyebrow. “Now what?” He asked, and the two shared a glance.

“I’ll show you how to put all of her gear on, and then we’ll head out to the forest and teach you how to ride first,” Petra said before Eld could speak, and she did just that as quickly as she could, but still talking him through each piece of equipment and how to put it on and alter it for the horse. As she was doing that, Eld went to fetch their horses and when they were done, they started the walk to the training forest.

Petra tied to make conversation with Levi, and he supposed it actually worked to get him to relax more around them. He couldn’t help it if he was tense around two strangers leading him off to a secluded area that they knew better than him. Petra spoke about the horses first, giving tips on how to ride- to sit back in her stride, to stand off the saddle in time with her trot, how to hold the reins properly and how to control the horse and how he should fall if the horse bucked him off. Then, she spoke about the Survey Corps itself- how long she’d been there, a bit about the operations squad.

When they reached a clearing in the forest, Eld gave him a boost onto the horse, and Levi could practically see him biting back a comment on his height as he did so.

The horse, like expected, wasn’t happy about having a rider, and she probably wasn’t the best choice for someone’s first horse. Levi had suspicions that Eld had picked the horse for that exact reason.

Multiple times Levi almost fell off, and multiple times he did, but each time he heaved himself back onto the damned horse and kept going.

Levi hardly even noticed as time went on and they continued their work with the horses- the horse eventually complied, much to Eld and Petra’s surprise, and they were happy to see that Levi was a fast learner, quickly picking up on riding, and they quickly taught him how to trot, canter, gallop, and jump with the horse.

From there, they began fighting with the horses- popping up the decoy titans and riding up to it on the horses and taking off of them. It was strenuous work and Eld continued to push him further and further, obviously interested in seeing how far he could push him.

“Alright, that’s it for now. We’ll ride back and let the horses rest, and after dinner we’ll get Oluo and Gunther for some sparring. And, unlike earlier, no weapons,” Eld said, eyes flicking to Levi briefly. The shorter male just nodded his head and gathered the reins of his horse in one hand and heaved himself up onto his horse. While the horse certainly still acted out- refused to go where instructed, tried to shake him off- she had calmed down enough to shock the two senior soldiers at her attitude. She’d only tried to kick Levi twice which was, apparently, a record for her.

He followed them out of the training forest, faintly shocked at how much time had passed and the fact they even missed lunch- not that he cared much, though.

“You’re a fast learner, Levi,” Eld commented as they reached the stables. Levi  shrugged softly, fixing his hold on the horses reins when she began acting up again.

“It’s natural,” he replied casually.

“I heard you almost beat Erwin in a sparring match,” Eld carried on. Again, Levi shrugged.

“I guess I did,” he said, pulling his horse to a halt and sliding off the saddle. Remembering what Petra had taught him, he began to take off the equipment and put it away. He gave the short-tempered mare a quick pet and one of the treats in the stables, before Eld assured him he was dismissed for dinner which had already begun.

He was slightly irritated that he had to show up to dinner with dust and dirt and sand over his uniform from training, but he didn’t have time to shower and he assumed it’d only get dirty again during sparring with them. 

“Levi-aniki!” Isabel’s voice was unapologetically loud when he got his dinner and sat down in the seat between her and Farlan.

“You look filthy,” Farlan commented jokingly, and Levi gently slapped his shoulder.

“You don’t say,” Levi muttered, gratefully taking a long drink of the water he had.

“You didn’t come by at lunch, I thought you were dead,” Isabel commented, her voice slightly muffled by the food in her mouth.

“With that sight, I wish I was,” Levi muttered, reaching one hand over to push her chin up and close her mouth, his nose wrinkling. “We got carried away,” he explained vaguely, shrugging and beginning to slowly dig into his dinner.

He spoke with Isabel and Farlan happily, learning that they had, indeed, been doing more work with more seniors and Erwin as well, like he’d said earlier, and they had more jobs after dinner to do for him.

Levi swiftly finished his meal and put his tray away. On his way out he passed his table again and clapped his hands onto Isabel and Farlan’s shoulders. “Try not to die before curfew,” he said. Farlan rolled his eyes but smiled and nudged him back.

“You too, ass-wipe,” Levi grinned fiercely at him. He left the building then, glancing around until he spotted Eld and Petra standing next to two other men.

“Ah, Levi, just in time,” Petra said, smiling at him when she spotted him. “Levi, meet Oluo and Gunther. Gunther, Oluo, meet Levi. He’s with us for the next few days,” Petra introduced, and Levi’s eyes flicked over to the two men. He bowed his head slightly in greeting before glancing up and down the two men. Oluo raised an eyebrow slightly, scrutinising Levi before he snorted.

“This is the new guy Erwin wants us to babysit?” He asked, glancing back at Eld. Eld simply shrugged, keeping silent, and Oluo looked back to an expressionless Levi.

“How old are you, kid?” Oluo asked and Levi narrowed his eyes.

“Old enough to be put with you,” he simply replied, and Oluo watched him for a moment longer.

“Alright then. Who’s sparring first?” He turned back to Eld, and the man glanced over everyone thoughtfully.

“Gunther and I will, Oluo, why don’t you start with our new friend. Petra, feel free to spectate them,” Eld instructed, and everyone nodded, though Oluo looked slightly exasperated.

Gunther and Eld stepped aside, and Levi followed Oluo a few steps into an open space.

“No holding back, kid. You’re with the real soldiers now,” Oluo said, and though Levi could tell he was saying it slightly jokingly, he just tilted his head to the side and bit back a retort. He slid into a fighting stance, keeping his fists high, and Oluo did the same.

He let Oluo strike first, dodging the incoming punch and obvious second swing he pulled through after it, aiming to where he had expected Levi to go to when he dodged, before he strafed back out of reach. Oluo was better than Levi first expected, to be fair. Despite his older appearance and cocky attitude, he was faster and stronger than he looked, and Levi ditched the idea of holding back to make him underestimate and then embarrass him.

Levi swiftly jumped forwards, aiming a close kick that grazed his stomach, followed by a swift jab and immediate left hook. Oluo stumbled to dodge the hits in their rapid succession, but he quickly gathered his balance and lunged towards Levi before he could jump out of the way, swiftly striking back.

Oluo lashed out, knocking out Levi’s legs, and he acted quickly, pushing himself back and flipping up onto his feet. He gritted his teeth together as Oluo continued to rush forwards, a determined expression on his face, and Levi’s hand twitched to lash out, grab a knife and defend himself. But this was sparring, and if he couldn’t do a little friendly sparring match, he might as well throw himself back into the slums.

Levi jumped to his side and behind him, spinning on his ankle and lunging forwards. He knocked out the back of his legs and went to follow him down for a pin, but Oluo spun around and grabbed his wrists on the way down, quickly flipping them so Levi was on the ground. Oluo clenched his jaw, twisting his wrist and digging his finger into the weak spot in his hand that made pain shoot through his arm and made his fingers twitch.

Levi pressed his lips together in a thin line and sucked in a breath as he turned his hands around and pushed forwards, pulling them out of Oluo’s grip. He grabbed his shirt, bucked his hips and pulled one shoulder down, forcing Oluo to tumble, and he kicked up to straddle his hips, and held him in a pin with his wrists clutched in one of Levi’s hands, his other arm a hair away from his windpipe.

When Oluo realised he couldn’t get out, he relaxed slowly, his cheeks flushing slightly. Slowly, Levi let go of him and stood up, hesitating a moment before offering a hand to the brunette. Oluo let out a small laugh, reaching up and using him to help himself to his feet.

“You’ve got skill, kid,” he commented, grunting as he got to his feet.

“So do you, old man,” Levi responded. Oluo raised an eyebrow at him, but after a moment he let out another small chuckle.

“And balls, apparently,” Oluo added, as if in an afterthought, and they turned to Petra, who had been standing there and watching them. She had a shocked but excited expression on her face, and she grinned widely at them.

“That was awesome!” She exclaimed, rocking on the balls of her feet, “you really handed it to him, Levi,” she laughed, ignoring Oluo’s playful glare.

“So the kid’s got more skill than I anticipated,” Oluo said with a shrug, “but it won’t happen next time,” he scoffed, and Levi raised an eyebrow.

“Why don’t we see?” He asked. Oluo and Petra’s eyes skipped to him quickly, eyebrows raising further.

“See what?”

“See if that’s true,” Levi rephrased, his lips twitching. A small smile spread Oluo’s lips, and he nodded, a smirk replacing the smile.

“Alright, yeah. Rematch, then. Don’t think I’ll go so easy on you this time,” Oluo stated, and after dusting himself off, he slid back into a fighting stance.

This match did, at least, go on for longer. Levi did have to admit that Oluo was, certainly, skilled in combat, and it was refreshing to have someone who he wasn’t used to fighting, and still posed a challenge as well. Levi had to put more effort in to trying to win this match, and even then Petra ended up calling it a draw when it went on for too long and neither of them had won the match.

“All I needed was more time,” Oluo said between heavy breaths, brushing dirt off his clothes, “I almost had him,” he added. Levi pushed his hair back from his face, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.

“Give me a challenge next time,” Levi snorted, but the slight upwards twitch to his lips proved it was only a joke. Oluo nudged him in the ribs sharply.

“Sleep with one eye open, kid,” he replied.

Levi’s eyes flicked over Oluo and he pursed his lips. “Don’t sleep at all tonight,” he responded.

“If you’re done threatening one another,” Eld spoke up, raising his voice over them and stepping forwards. There were a few dust stains on his clothes and his hands, and he pushed his hair back from his face.

“Levi, tomorrow we’re up early for breakfast and we’ll focus on team building in the morning, and I expect you to be ready,” he informed. Levi nodded his head, and when he was excused, he made his way through the dark corridors to the bedroom.

It had gotten darker as they sparred, and candles had been lit along the corridors, and they cast eerie shadows across the walls and floor. Despite the fatigue from the long day of work slowing his steps, he felt on edge and anxious, enough so that his stomach turned and the flickering shadows sent his eyes snapping to watch them.

Inside the bedroom, everyone was talking quietly, some people lazing in their beds while talking, meanwhile others were walking around and messing with each other.  Levi made his way over to his bed, slinking down on it and waiting the two seconds it took for Isabel to throw herself onto his bed, and for Farlan to sit on the end gently.

“They’re really taking a lot of your time,” Farlan commented. Levi lifted his head to him, snorting softly.

“You’re telling me,” he shook his head. He began unlacing his shoes, setting them together by his bed, before swinging his legs onto the bed. “I’ve got to be up early tomorrow, as well, for more training with that squad,” he told them. “What’s Erwin been having you do? Polishing his boots?” He retorted, and Farlan shook his head slightly in amusement.

“We worked with him and some other people from a squad,” Isabel perked up, and Levi raised an eyebrow curiously.

“Guess he’s really spreading us out, eh,” Levi muttered, looking away thoughtfully.

“He said we might be going out of the walls soon, so it’s not a bad idea. He needs to find out where we’re best suited for this kind of thing. It’s not like the underground,” Farlan said nonchalantly, shrugging and picking at a thread on the blanket.

Levi pursed his lips, taking a deep breath in. “Maybe so,” he said, turning his gaze to the window at the other side of the room.

Farlan placed his hand heavily on Levi’s knee, heaving himself off the bed. “If you’re up early you should get some sleep now,” he said, choosing to purposefully ignore the look Levi gave him.

“Come on, Isabel, we’ll let him get some rest,” he said, ushering Isabel off the bed. His hand ran through Levi’s hair, ruffling it quickly before he ducked away and towards his bed next to Levi’s.

Despite knowing he most likely wouldn’t sleep tonight, especially after how he’d woken this morning and the idea of closing his eyes and putting himself in such a vulnerable state made his heart race, he still sat somewhat comfortable on the bed and dipped his head slightly, eyes half-lidded and watching the sky outside the window.


	9. Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's a super short chapter and a bit of a filler, but the next one's are longer as the story begins to pick up!  
> As always, if you like it please feel free to drop a comment, and I hope you enjoy where I've planned to take this!  
> You can find me on Tumblr @ genderfxck-levi if you want to talk to me!

Levi stretched his arms out above his head, slowly pulling himself up off the bed and silently slipping his shoes on and lacing them up. He wasn’t sure exactly when he was supposed to go down to meet the squad he was working with, but he supposed it was better to be early than late, and he was bored trying to trick himself into pretending sitting here was actually at least resting himself. Plus, the sound of snores and muttering were getting on his nerves, and he didn’t like how close he got to falling asleep before he jerked awake.

He first headed to the showers, washing the sleep from his body and relaxing his muscles under the spray of hot water. He quickly towelled himself dry before getting changed again and walking through the large castle. The candles had been blown out at some point later into the night, and the corridors were lit by the sun that was only just beginning to rise. Levi’s eyes easily adjusted to the darkness though, and he made his way to the mess hall.

At the moment, it was empty, and Levi wandered inside, walking leisurely through the tables. He glanced around the place, odd now that it was empty and quiet rather than full of people eating and talking. It was kind of nice, to see the place so quiet for a change, though slightly eerie.

Levi had only been there for perhaps ten minutes before the doors opened up again from where he’d came in. Levi turned to look at the people coming in, and saw it was, in fact, the Special Operations Squad filing in, talking in hushed voices.

“Levi,” Eld said, his expression changing quickly to shock before he schooled it. Levi quirked an eyebrow, standing straighter. He wasn’t use to the whole authority thing, but he knew that, if he was going to be in this place, he had to learn to treat the superiors with the respect their authority brought, even if it irked him. At least no one seemed to be intent on manipulating their authority.

“At least I can trust you to be up early,” he muttered, and Levi tipped his head in a small nod.

“We’ll get breakfast once they serve it at the same time with everyone else. For now, we’re going to check our gear and warm up. After breakfast, we’ll really start with the team building I spoke about,” Eld informed. Levi nodded his head, following them out quickly. Eld led the way out with Oluo by his side, the two talking quietly, and Gunther fell into step beside Levi.

“We’ve not had much time to talk, have we?” The brunette commented, and Levi raised his eyebrow slightly. He shook his head, glancing back at him.

“We’ve not,” he agreed. Gunther smiled at him, offering a hand. Levi stared at it curiously, but he then took it and gingerly shook it.

“It’ll hopefully be nice working with you. At least, for now anyway, unless the Commander decides to put you in our squad officially,” he said. Levi narrowed his eyes slightly. He hadn’t thought about that. Why else would Erwin have him working with this squad specifically, while he had Isabel and Farlan working elsewhere.

“Yeah,” Levi murmured in response, “hopefully.”

Gunther kicked up a slight conversation between them, talking mostly about the squad and their training and the corps. He was obviously curious about Levi, but he respectfully held back from answering any personal questions. He continued to chat as they checked through all the 3DMG, and he helped Levi do so as well, explaining more about the technical side of the gear.

“How d’you work in a team?” He asked at one point, and as Levi was buckling the straps onto himself tightly, he cocked his head to the side.

“I’ve only worked with Isabel and Farlan, and I’d say we work pretty well together,” he replied with a shrug, lifting his gaze from the buckles on his harness to the man. Gunther pursed his lips, nodded slightly.

“As long as you can work well outside of the walls with your squad, I guess that’s where it counts the most,” the brunette mused. Levi nodded, his eyes flicking back down.

“Once you’re all done, three laps around the yard,” Eld called out, his voice strong, and then he turned around to begin his own laps. Levi hurried to finish up with his gear before he began his laps, following after Eld.

It really was strange to be working with the Corps like this. He wasn’t used to warming up with laps and working under squads and under a commander. He was used to warming up by fighting some idiotic gang member who wanted to see him gone, he was used to trusting only Isabel and Farlan and knowing anything else would get him killed, and he was used to authority being a challenge and something dangerous, something he couldn’t stand. And now, here he was, working in a military regime, answering to superiors, being placed into another identical spot and labelled ‘soldier’.

It made him bristle slightly, the realisation he was just another identical soldier in answering to superiors and he expelled his feelings through his feet hitting the ground as he ran, pushing him faster and faster. He kept note of the laps he did, his feet eating the ground up as he ran, and he felt more energetic when he finished the three laps, and he itched to do more- to spar, to fight, to go run through filthy streets and make the military polices’ lives hell.

Eld had finished first, obviously, and Levi stood a few paces away from him as then Gunther, Oluo and Petra finished their laps and jogged over to them.

“We’ll spar two on two first. Levi, Petra, you two work together against Gunther and I. Oluo, you spectate first, and we’ll swap out each time.” He waved a hand vaguely and Levi stepped towards Petra’s side, his eyes glancing up and down the short woman. She did intrigue Levi- with her small stature and warm nature, it was odd to see her put on a special operations squad, but he supposed he was the last person to judge a book by its cover. She was in that squad for a reason, obviously.

Eld and Gunther stood across from them, taking a few moments to quietly speak to each other about their combat tactics. Levi turned to face Petra.

“How do you want to do this, then?” He asked, and watched as her eyes lingered on their opponents, her lips pursing thoughtfully.

“I know how they usually fight more than you do, though you seem to be able to predict their moves just as easily. Eld will probably want to go for you first, I’d assume. So you go for Eld, I’ll go for Gunther. They’re both bigger and slower than us, so we have that advantage,” Petra spoke quietly, her head tilted to them. Levi eyed the two across from them, and then nodded.

“Have each-others backs. This is team building, they’re most likely going to pull some tricks to make us rely more on one another. I expect you’ll be able to see it coming and act accordingly,” she added. Levi turned his eyes back to the woman, seeing her warm eyes and gentle smile, the determined and strong air to her as she stood up straighter. He nodded firmly, humming in response. Before he got into a fighting stance, Petra gently touched his shoulder, despite the way he tensed.

“And Levi? Trust me,” she grinned. Levi forced the tension from his shoulders, tipping his head to the side.

“As long as you trust me,” he responded, and Petra’s smile widened.

All four of them slid into their fighting stances, and he and Petra let the other two strike first, swiftly dodging. Like Petra had said, they used their height and speed and agility to their advantage, ducking under their arms and dashing around them. Levi was focusing on getting a hit on Eld, and he was steadily getting closer and closer to getting a hit, when the feminine cry over his shoulder grabbed his attention. For a moment, he pictured something else. Isabel behind him, a mans fist pulling her hair, mud splashing as she slipped to her knees, and the sound of her scrabbling to try and regain the upper hand against the filthy gang member above her. Her sharp _“Levi-!”_ that was cut off by a fist.

Levi hardly blinked before he had kicked Eld’s legs out from underneath him, and he rushed over to Petra’s- _Isabel’s-_ side, while she was struggling under Gunther’s pin. He pulled Gunther off of her in a sharp movement, muscles straining, and he pulled him to the ground, flipping him and pinning him firmly. His fingers itched for the knife in his boot and he forced away the visions of blood mixing with mud, forced himself to loosen his dangerous grip on Gunther and to look at him. He turned to briefly look at Petra, just Petra, and saw her just getting to her feet, both her and Eld sharing shocked looks at the speed with which Levi had reacted.

After a few moments of struggling, Gunther settled with being unable to get out of Levi’s grip and relaxed on the floor, his lips twitching upwards.

“That was good,” he laughed breathily, and Levi didn’t let go of him until a moment longer, composing himself. Gunther propped himself up on his elbows, raising an eyebrow slightly.  “Are you alright, Levi?” He asked.

Levi pressed his lips together and staggered to his feet, ignoring the question. He offered a hand to the brunette beneath him and helped him up once he realised that Eld and Petra had stopped fighting. He fixed them with confused expressions, head tilted to the side.

“Are we done?” He asked. Eld schooled his expression, standing up straighter.

“We only just started,” Eld stated, shaking his head, “I’ll admit, I was surprised by your reflexes. You’re fast,” he said. Levi glanced away, ducking his head.

“And you immediately went to Petra’s help,” he added. Petra smiled towards the raven-haired male enthusiastically. Levi kept his eyes on the ground, letting out a quiet _tsk._

“I heard she needed help,” Levi simply said, shrugging.

“Good. That’s what I expect,” Eld nodded, “that’s what I want to see when you work in a team. Now- again.”

They fell back into a fighting stance once Gunther switched out with Oluo, and then they began again, this match lasting longer than the last. Eld went for Levi again, and they ended up switching opponents during the fight. Though Levi had been hoping to be able to spar with Gunther, he was happy to spar against Oluo once more. The man was a surprising challenge, and it was no fun if he was never challenged.

Levi ducked under an incoming punch, dashing around Oluo’s side and gripping his wrist tightly, pulling it with him and locking his wrist against his back. His foot swept out Oluo’s, and he followed him to the ground as he fell, pinning him beneath him. Oluo grunted in frustration underneath him, sighing and squirming before he accepted his loss, and Levi risked a glance back at Petra, who was struggling back and forth with Eld. She ducked down and with impressive speed dashed around, grabbing onto him and pulling him down sharply.

She struggled with her hold for a moment before locking it, and Eld relaxed beneath her.

Levi got off Oluo and helped the older man up, and he dusted himself down, frowning at the dust coating his white pants for a quick moment.

Eld continued their training session until breakfast when they split off, and Levi nibbled quickly at the food before he headed off again, much to Isabel’s displeasure.

Eld ran more team-building exercises between them, and Levi had to praise him for his creativity with the activities. Sometimes Erwin would show up, silently observing them as they worked before disappearing again, only to turn up again twenty minutes later. It was almost distracting, but Levi tuned it out.

The squad were finishing just in time for dinner, heading towards the large castle once more, when the Commander decided to show his face again.

“Get some early rest tonight,” he said, locking eyes with Eld, “we’re leaving tomorrow morning. I want you all to help with packing the carts after dinner, too,” instructed, his blue, blue eyes roaming over each one of them. They all nodded, and Levi quirked a brow curiously before he nodded also.

“I’ve already informed Farlan and Isabel of this and their positions. I’ll catch up with you after dinner,” Erwin said when he turned to Levi, and the shorter man nodded, lips pursed.

He followed the rest of them back inside, half tempted to duck away for a quick shower, but he supposed he’d just get dirty again while he was packing, so it didn’t matter much. He grabbed a tray of food and settled in between Isabel and Farlan, letting out a content sigh when he sat down.

“You’ve been away from us for so long!” Isabel exclaimed, her fork stabbing into a piece of a potato, and Levi nodded heavily.

“You’re telling me,” he muttered, taking his glass of water.

“They’ve really been keeping you busy, eh?” Farlan commented, and Levi snorted.

“I’m going to be one big bruise soon,” he stated, and he stabbed his fork into a piece of broccoli, dropping it into his mouth.

“Even working with the Commander, we’ve had free time,” Farlan added, and Isabel nodded. 

“He even had Farlan help him with paperwork!” Isabel exclaimed, and Levi’s thin eyebrows raised, a snort leaving his sealed lips. Levi turned to the blonde, seeing his sheepish expression, and he snickered quietly.

“I’m sure you adored that,” he said, and Farlan scoffed.

“Oh, absolutely,” he replied sarcastically. Levi nudged him gently, an amused smirk on his lips as he picked at his food. When he felt full, he stood up and took his tray away, closely followed by Isabel and Farlan.

“I didn’t expect he’d bring us outside of the walls so quickly,” Levi commented, making his way over to the carts. People outside were running around quickly, preparing carts and horses as quickly as they could.

“I know, I didn’t expect he’d trust us so quickly to take us outside of the walls,” Farlan replied. Levi pressed his lips together, picking up a gas canister and sliding it onto a cart with multiple others.

“Maybe we just blew him away with our skills,” Isabel mused, and Levi raised an eyebrow at her.

“I didn’t know he watched you eat,” he said. Isabel’s mouth parted in a small ‘o’, and she gently slapped him.

“I have an impressive stomach, alright,” she stated defensively, and Levi hummed, nudging her stomach.

“I know,” he agreed, and she huffed, busying herself in picking up a gas canister and grumbling as she loaded it onto the cart in front of them.

“I mean, we already knew how to use the gear. Showed him that we could cut the titan decoys perfectly well, showed we could work in a team without you,” Farlan pointed out.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Levi questioned, and the two snickered.

“Don’t worry about it, bro,” Isabel assured, gently patting his shoulder.

“He’s not even told me about my position,” Levi muttered. Farlan glanced back at him curiously.

“Really?”

“Nope. He said he’d find me after dinner, and here we are,” Levi shrugged. Isabel’s hand cuffed the back of his head, and Levi whipped around to glare at her.

“You’re so impatient, Levi,” she scolded, shaking her head disapprovingly.

“Coming from you,” he snorted.

They fell into silence as they helped the hurried frenzy to pack their carts, focusing on the work. Levi had heaved himself onto a different cart, taking packs from other people to sort them in the cart, and he noticed the Commander walking away from the people he’d been speaking to and began heading towards him, bright eyes trained impassively on the raven-haired man.

Levi didn’t stop packing the cart he was on until Erwin reached it, and even then he ignored him for several moments before looking up from his work, short strands of dark hair falling over his eyes.

“Commander,” he greeted, setting another pack down and then turning to face him. From up here, Levi was taller than him, and he quite preferred this angle to his usual.

“Levi,” he nodded, “why don’t we walk?”

“I’m quite busy packing, to be honest.”

“I’m sure you can spare a few minutes,” Erwin said, and he lifted a hand up. “Do you need a hand?” He asked, and Levi narrowed his eyes at him. He ignored the teasing hand, jumping down from the cart and stepping to his side.

“Lead the way, then,” he said coldly, and Erwin did just that, a small, smug smile on his face before he wiped it off quickly.

“I’m sure you’re surprised at me bringing you out of the walls already,” he said, and Levi nodded.

“You have kept a very fast pace since we arrived,” Levi commented.

“No use letting everyone get comfortable, now. You were already familiar with the gear we used, and you already have exceptional skill in close combat. You proved you could adapt quickly, and you are actually okay with your supers,” Erwin mused, and Levi cocked his head to the side but held his tongue.

“You’ll be with me while we’re out of the walls for our mission tomorrow. I want you and your friends to first get used to being outside of the walls and facing real titans- you’ve proved you can fight, but the real things are different than some wooden decoys- and we’ll see how you can handle yourselves out there.”

“I can promise that you won’t have me shitting my pants when we’re out there,” Levi said, standing up straighter and looking up at Erwin. His lips twitched slightly, and he glanced down at him briefly.

“We’ll see,” he responded, and Levi refrained from hitting the Commander. Erwin obviously noticed that, and made his smirk more noticeable.

“You’re quite smug for a military commander, you know,” Levi commented, and Erwin shrugged minutely.

“And you’re quite vocal for someone under my command,” Erwin responded. Levi’s tongue dashed along his teeth as he gently shook his head.

“Everything you say to me always sounds like a threat or a challenge,” Levi snorted tensely, and Erwin raised an eyebrow.

“Maybe you just interpret everything as a threat or a challenge,” he replied, and Levi’s narrowed eyes turned up to him. “Or maybe you’re right,” he added with a shrug. “We met in different circumstances compared to everyone else here. It makes you interesting. You’ve not got a strict, military upbringing, and you hardly see me as your superior outside of giving you commands. You’re fascinating,” Erwin said, and Levi glanced to the side, gently _tsk-_ ing.

“Well, I hope you don’t expect me to start saluting at the sound of your footsteps,” he shrugged, and Erwin let his amusement only show through a brief smile.

“I look forwards to seeing you in here,” Erwin stated, and then he gestured to the side.

“We’re done here. Be ready in the morning to head out,” he added. Levi nodded, and then he turned around and headed back the way they came.

A lot of people had begun to head back inside, a few people lingering to check over everything. Isabel and Farlan were painfully pretending to be checking over the horses, and they waited until Levi reached them, looking curiously at him.

“Idiot thinks I’m fascinating,” he scoffed, and their looks of curiosity turned to confusion. “Well, busy day tomorrow. C’mon,” he urged, and the trio headed towards the castle, lights flickering through the window.

Anxiety was steadily bubbling through him as they made their way into the castle, heading towards the showers and splitting with Isabel. He showered silently, rubbing the dirt and grime thoroughly off his body, and forced himself to push his stupid nerves away.

Whatever happens, happens, and he couldn’t help it by worrying now. They would be fine. They were skilled, and Levi would never let any harm come to Isabel and Farlan. Never.

The bedroom was filled with hushed chatting between everyone, obviously about the outing tomorrow, and Levi ignored it all as he got comfortable in bed. He highly doubted he’d ever catch any sleep, but he might as well get comfortable. He listened as voices turned to snoring, and he eyed one of the candles set on a dresser as it burned low, casting a gentle flickering glow around the room. He turned his gaze to the window, seeing the outline of the walls in the distance, the grassy plains beyond them.

It’d be fine. He wouldn’t let it be anything but.


	10. Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the lack of updates! I got hooked on writing my other story- feel free to check that out ;)- Body Was Made, and I had to sit down and rewrite where this was going so I wasn't just making it up as I went along. But now I'm back, and hyped to write this!

People woke up earlier than usual the next morning, and Levi, upon hearing more people wake up and walking around the house, got up quickly to shower before everyone else, and he waited until Farlan and Isabel had woken up (once again, having to shake the girl until she finally got up and out of bed) and showered to go down for a quick breakfast.

People were still sluggish as they woke up early, slowly digging into their breakfast, and nerves were high, people chatting in hushed voices and shoulders up in tension. Even Isabel and Farlan were anxious, though they hid it well. Levi still noticed the nervous laughs and glances around, though, and he could read them like an open book (if you ignored the fact that Levi was only just learning how to read.)

Levi picked half-heartedly at breakfast and listened to everyone else chat.

“Are you guys nervous?” Asked Eren from his left, and Levi’s eyes flicked to the short-tempered kid. Eren looked more excited and determined than anything, and Levi quirked a brow slightly. He shrugged.

“We’ll see what happens,” he responded, and Eren hummed.

“Fair enough,” he commented, and Isabel leaned forwards on the table to look at Eren.

“What was your first time outside of the walls like?” She asked, and Eren turned to face her, his lips pursing in thought as Mikasa and Armin glanced at him and between each other.

“It was freaky,” he admitted with a soft laugh, “I mean, we’d already seen titans before going out- with the whole, uh, wall situation… But, it was still scary. I was on edge, like, we were out in the middle of nowhere, and I had to trust the people around me to kill these giants and keep us alive. It wasn’t easy, and I’m not saying you get used to it, but… Well, you trust the people you’re with more, and you get less scared, but… Seeing the people you’d trained with, people you’d worked with and gotten to know, seeing people watch their childhood friends die in front of them, and then coming back into the walls with a cart full of bodies- or just body parts- it… That part doesn’t get easier,” he said, voice falling quieter. Everyone around the table nodded in agreement, solemnly looking around, and Levi wondered just how many people would have first been at this table, whose bed’s he had taken.

His eyes flicked over to Isabel and Farlan, the two still staring at Eren. His fist clenched under the table, and he pressed his lips together. He’d gotten them above ground, and he’d be damned if he let them get hurt.

Levi set his fork down on the table, deciding he was finished with it, and pushed his tray an inch further away from him on the table. Yes, he was nervous to leave the walls- he felt like the last few days had gone in a blur. He’d been whisked above ground, and now he was presented with a good living standard and so much food it made him sick, and now he was leaving the wall to fight giant human-eating creatures. It made him feel dizzy and he almost wished he could have more time to settle before leaving- his stomach still couldn’t handle the amount of regular food he was getting, he doubted he’d put on anything more than a pound or two in his short time here, and he’d slept a grand total of less than six hours (not that that was unusual for him, anyway.) But he supposed he wouldn’t enjoy being told to rest and focus on recuperation when he wasn’t about to die and could still be useful.

“Have you been told what squad or where you’ll be working when we’re outside?” Armin asked, and Levi glanced up from the table. “Farlan and I are together! I can’t remember what squad Commander Erwin said we were with, but we’ll be on the inside of the left flank,” Isabel exclaimed enthusiastically, happy to jump from a morbid topic.

“Oh, not many of us are actually on that side- Sasha is, I think, but mostly it’s just other cadets, but they’re cool too!” The blonde informed, and Sasha turned to glance over at them with a grin.

“It’s a pretty safe position to be in, and you can trust those guys to be there if you need help,” Armin assured the two of them with a friendly smile. Sasha just beamed enthusiastically at them.

“What about you, Levi? Are you not with them?” He asked, and Levi shook his head.

“The Commander wants me with him while we’re out,” Levi informed with a shrug, and immediately, everyone’s eyebrows rose up.

“Really? Commander Erwin wants you to be in his squad?” Reiner said with evident shock in his tone. Levi tipped his head in a nod, his eyes dropping to the side slightly.

“Damn, Levi. Now I really want to see you in action,” Reiner commented, barking out a laugh. His eyes ran up and down Levi briefly before coming back to his face. “Just wait ‘till you actually get some meat on your bones and a good few nights of rest,” He said, and Levi pressed his lips together.

“Well, I’m probably going to have to save her ass, so you might get to actually ‘see me in action’ later,” he replied, looking purposely at an offended-looking Isabel. Reiner laughed softly, shaking his head.

“Well, hopefully no one will get hurt,” he said, eyes flicking back to his breakfast before he set it aside. Levi nodded his head in agreement. He did hope that he didn’t have to struggle to save someone.

Slowly, people began to put their breakfasts away, most plates more untouched than usual today, and Levi followed everyone outside. Erwin was outside already, talking to his Special Operations Squad, with Hanji nearby. Horses had been brought to the carts and were waiting, and people were hurrying to check over everything they had.

When everyone was outside they stood awkwardly together until Erwin finished his conversation with his squad and his eyes roamed over everyone who fell silent, standing straighter. “Get on your horses. We’re leaving now, if everyone is ready,” he said, voice loud and clear. Everyone nodded before dispersing to their horses that had been pulled out of the stables. There didn’t seem to be an awfully lot of people going on the mission, and Levi wondered briefly if it was a team-building mission- it would make sense. There were a lot of the younger cadets, and then him and Isabel and Farlan were joining, with only a handful of older soldiers, presumably for protection should they need it.

Levi found the horse he had been given and he hauled himself up onto it, fixing the stirrups to his height, and then he brought her around to the rest of the group. Isabel and Farlan had slid into their place near Sasha, and Levi rode his horse towards Erwin who acknowledged him with a nod.

Erwin led the way forwards, out onto the streets and cobbled roads, and Levi couldn’t help but look back at the eyes that watched from the sides of the streets, a mix of admiration and hatred following them. Children watched the blonde Commander with wide, awing eyes, waving at them in hopes for acknowledgment from the soldiers, while some adults stood tensely, watery-glare burning into Erwin’s back, their blame for close losses placed entirely on his shoulders.

Levi turned forwards, tipping his head up. It was cloudy today and somewhat dark, cold enough to make Levi uncomfortable. The clouds were dark and promising rain, and wind whipped his cloak around his shoulders, pushed his hair back. He watched as Erwin brought his horse to a stop in front of the large gates that led to the outside. His eyes scanned over everything- the families stood outside their houses to watch them quietly, the shops and the smell of fresh pastries wafting from bakeries. Children had stopped playing, now standing with their friends next to them and their toys in hand. Trees and flowers blossomed brightly, and the infamous walls towered above them. The Military Police he so despised stood ready to open the gates.

The Commander sat straighter in the saddle of his horse, his cold gaze sitting on the gate. His voice boomed out through the streets, reaching everyones ears, as he announced the start of the mission. The gate slowly lifted, a rusty groan coming from it, and light flooded through the tunnel it created. Erwin nudged his horse on, and everyone hurried to follow after him. Their hooves battered the road loudly, and Levi gripped onto his reins tightly as he followed behind Erwin.

 

Outside the walls revealed hills and fields of green grass, sparse trees dotted around. It seemed… Peaceful. On a clear, sunny day, it might have been beautiful. It was the exact opposite of what Levi would have expected a place that served as a murder and burial ground for many. To be fair, Levi didn’t know what he had suspected. Titans running around everywhere, bodies sprawled around. Of course that wasn’t what it would always look like, but perhaps it would later on.

The formation spread out, and Levi glanced to the left. Isabel and Farlan were riding side by side, and both of them were wearing wide smiles as they looked around. Isabel’s eyes were wide and she was laughing, sitting back in her horses’ stride.

“Levi-aniki!” She called over to him, and he raised an eyebrow. “Look how pretty it is out here!” She exclaimed, one hand swiping around her in a wide gesture. Levi couldn’t help the way his lips twitched upwards slightly.

“Yeah, it is,” he agreed.

They rode comfortably, people chatting happily together. Levi occasionally perked up in Isabel and Farlan’s conversation, but mainly he stayed deep in thought, looking around the place until a voice from the back spoke up.

“Fifteen metre and ten metre approaching from the right!” Someone yelled, and Levi instantly turned his head to look towards the right.

Sure enough, two huge… Well, titans, were running over towards them, feet eating the ground in long strides. He could hear the loud thuds from their feet slamming into the ground, saw the few short trees nearby shake. The tallest one had its’ arms flailing around, while the shorter one had its’ arms pressed tightly to its chest. Their faces were stretched in wide grins, eyes seeking out their human prey, and greasy hair fell from their heads. Sharp, huge teeth glinted at them.

Levi felt like icy water had been injected into his bloodstream. His jaw slacked slightly as he watched the monsters approach wordlessly, and he felt like all other sound was drowned out by their heavy footsteps.

He whipped his head forwards sharply, looking to Erwin, forcing his lips together and to school his expression. His blue, blue eyes were watching the titans calmly, and then he flicked his gaze to Levi.

“Hanji, Levi, take care of them,” he ordered. The brunette to his right sat up with a wacky grin, fixing her glasses into place and shifting her weight on her horses’ saddle. “Sir yes sir!” She called back, and looked back to Levi. “Come on, then!” She encouraged, and then turned her horse to ride right over to the titans. Levi hesitated, his eyes flicking up to the approaching monsters, before he clenched his jaw and nodded. He turned his horse to follow Hanji, his grip on the reins subconsciously tightening, and he tried to force himself to relax. But seeing a real titan, much bigger than the decoys, was an experience unlike any other.

“I’ll take the tall one!” Hanji yelled, and Levi’s eyes locked onto the ‘short’ one, if something ten metres tall could be considered short.

He heard the metallic whiz of Hanji’s gear, her anchors thudding into the titans’ flesh. Levi shifted on his horse, fixed his grip on his gear, and sent his anchors flying into the titan, lifting him from his horse. Its’ eyes followed him as he spun around it, head turning slowly, and one of its hands pressed against its chest reached out, large fingers reaching for him, and he could feel the air shift as it narrowly missed grabbing his legs. He shifted his trajectory once he rounded to its nape, and he narrowed his eyes in concentration. With momentum, he spun in the air, and narrowed in on its weak spot. His blades slashed viciously through the air, and then through its’ nape, and hot blood sprayed out of the wound, followed by hot steam. He landed next to the gash he created and pushed back off of it, using his gear to slow his descent and he found his horse hurrying back over to him. He quickly pulled himself onto the saddle and looked around, relaxing when he saw Hanji safely sitting on her own horse, beaming and covered in steaming blood that made Levi’s nose wrinkle in disgust, and even more so when he realised his arms were coated in the blood slowly steaming away.

“Woo-wee! That was a great first kill, Levi!” Hanji commented, guiding her horse to his side. She pushed her bloody glasses up her forehead so she could see him better than she could through splatters of blood.

“Uh, thanks,” Levi responded, eyes flicking towards the titan corpses sprawled across the ground. Like the blood, they were steaming heavily, flesh melting away to show clear bone that broke apart and disappeared in a gust of steam.

Hanji led the way back to the group, slipping back into formation, and Erwin watched them before he nodded approvingly. “Good job,” he praised, turning his head forwards again. “That was a smooth first kill, Levi,” he commented, and Levi tipped his head down slightly.

“I thought I might have seen you freeze for a moment,” the blonde added, blue eyes leering at Levi, and the shorter male pressed his lips together, rolling his eyes.

“I never freeze,” Levi snorted, and Erwin simply smirked back at him.

Levi watched as the blood on his clothes steamed out of existence as they rode on. Isabel spoke excitedly about Levi’s kill, though he could tell she, and Farlan, were slightly shaken from their first titan sighting but they composed themselves quickly, shrugging it off.

They approached the old settlement they planned to camp in slowly, and it began to rain, unsurprisingly. Levi lifted his hood over his head to shield himself from the weather slightly, tilting his head against it. The weather dampened their moods as well as their clothes, but Isabel and Farlan were happy to see it, enjoying the weather and savouring just being outside. It made Levi both happy and sad to see, that something so simple made them so happy. But they were happy, and so was he.

They reached the settlement soon after with no other titan encounters, and they set their horses up in one of the old houses with a large hole knocked into one of the walls, making it easier for them to bring the horses inside. Levi slid off his horses’ side, patting her neck gently before he began to loosen the girth around her and set her saddle to the side. He took one of the feedbacks, holding it to her mouth as she ate, and then set it aside when she seemed finished.

He followed everyone when they finished tending to their own horses, heading into the building across from their makeshift stables. Erwin was sitting inside while Hanji poked around the fireplace thoughtfully, rearranging the wood inside. People set their stuff aside, spreading out their sleeping rolls on the floor and sitting down, taking long drinks from their canteens and picking at the food they packed.

“The weather isn’t promising, but it’s not bad enough that we need to sit out for a while,” Erwin spoke up, his eyes roaming over everyone. Levi busied himself with setting his own stuff out, a bit further from everyone else with a clear view of the entire room and the door, and Isabel and Farlan settled down next to him.

“Sort yourselves out and get something to eat. We’ll see how the weather is after that and possibly head out again.” Erwin turned back to Hanji. “How are you coming along with your experiments?” He asked, and his eyes flicked over to Eren, who gave a hesitant smile before turning to Mikasa, who looked tense and irritated.

Levi turned back to Isabel and Farlan, propping himself against the wall and resting one elbow on his knee. “That kill Levi,” Farlan commented with a long breath, “it was impressive. Did a little spin and everything,” he said, and Levi snorted.

“Well, I wasn’t just going to sit there and let it grab me,” he replied sarcastically.

“Still, Levi-bro, it was cool!” Isabel exclaimed, pushing herself against him. “How are you so skilled? It’s not fair!” She sighed dramatically, shaking her head.

“Some of us just practice our skills more than our eating,” he said, and the girl gasped in mock-hurt.

“When you have to eat for your life, you’ll regret it,” Isabel stated, folding her arms across her chest and draping herself across his lap, her lips pursed and eyes staring forwards.

Levi sighed in exasperation, tipping his head back to rest against the wall. “I’m sure that’ll happen,” he muttered with a roll of his eyes, but he didn’t shove her off, and began picking at the food he had.

The rest of the day was rather uneventful. They got settled down and Hanji lit the fire. The weather worsened, rain pounding down against the ceiling and walls and wind howling outside. Reluctantly, Erwin decided they had to wait the night out, and people took shifts sitting outside under the overhang of a roof, keeping an eye out for any threats, while everyone else chatted amongst themselves happily. There was always an air of caution though, everyone ready to spring up if the person on watched called out “titan”.

“How are you finding life with us?” Someone asked, and Levi snapped out of his thoughts, watching as Reiner lowered himself to sit across from the trio, attempting to make friendly conversation. He held out a canteen of water for offer. Levi shook his hand politely to decline the offer, and he glanced around.

“It’s not bad.” He shrugged. “Unusual, I guess, but not bad.”

“It’s great!” Isabel gushed, still draped over Levi’s lap, just now on her stomach instead, much more enthusiastically. “Everyone here’s so kind, and the food is so, so good! And plus- just look out the window- at the sky and the clouds and the stars, the rain, the grass, the trees- it’s beautiful!” She beamed, her hands clenching excitedly into fists shaking by her jaw.

Reiner chuckled softly at the girls enthusiasm. “Well, at least you weren’t here when we were training. The amount of drama that caused- you joined just in time to miss creating any drama with people,” he joked lightly, “and I’d hope people are being nice to you. I know some people are more quiet than others, but that’s just them, you know,” he mused.

“Oh, no, that’s fine. Levi here isn’t the most talkative either, if you haven’t gathered that already,” Farlan said, nudging Levi teasingly. Levi rolled his eyes in response, and Reiner chuckled.

“I mean, but you’ve got that mysterious air about you- it works,” he joked, and Levi raised an eyebrow.

“I’m mysterious?” He repeated. Reiner shrugged.

“Well, all of you are- you come from the Underground, seemingly already knowing the Commander, and from a situation enough to make Eren and Armin uncomfortable to talk about. You’re extremely skilled, even despite your obvious weak physical state currently- no offense, sorry- and you’re just, well, mysterious,” Reiner said with a soft laugh, and Levi hummed, glancing away.

“Well, I don’t think that’s a bad thing,” he murmured, and Reiner shook his head.

“It isn’t,” he confirmed.

Reiner sat with them for a while longer, chatting warmly to them all, before he eventually went back to sit beside Bertholdt and Annie, laughing with them, though Annie only gave a slight twitch of her lips.

Levi didn’t think Reiner was a bad person- he seemed almost like the big brother to everyone here, friends with everyone and inviting and kind. He seemed eager to genuinely get to know him and his friends like he knew the rest of the squad, and his friendliness made Levi cautious. He didn’t like the idea of him getting past the walls he had built as a necessary defence mechanism.

Still, while Reiner seemed like the perfect person, a great friend, something still didn’t sit right with him. A little niggling in the back of his head that raised a red flag for Levi- his warnings never failed him, and he would be a fool to stop listening to it now.

Levi settled back with Isabel and Farlan when Reiner left. Isabel was slumped tiredly into his side, and Farlan was chatting with him quietly. They had turned so they could see outside the window and watched fat raindrops fall against it. He would never admit it out loud, but he enjoyed moments like these with Isabel and Farlan. They were his first real friends, and he doubted he’d ever trust someone as much as he trusted them. He knew that he could count on them in whatever situation, and though he hardly said it, as much as Isabel said he was like a brother to her, he felt like she was his younger sister.

She was always running into trouble and counting on Levi or Farlan to have her back, and she was short tempered and rash and too quick to trust. She was childish and playful, fiercely loyal and had full confidence in him and Farlan. She was as much of a troublesome younger sibling as a skilled individual. Levi thought back to the art she’d done- pieces of scrap paper he had stuffed in his pocket, actually, from when he snatched it before leaving the Underground. She was definitely skilled.

Farlan, too, felt much like a brother to him. Farlan was probably the most sensible of the trio- he often didn’t approve of how Levi had opted to get money in the Underground, but he’d always helped him in the end, and he thought about things rationally. He was a fair, good person too, and rather well educated. He knew someone that had been like their personal doctor when Levi got into trouble and his own medical knowledge wouldn’t suffice, and while Isabel comforted physically, Farlan could comfort someone with words and knew just the right thing to say.

Levi looked between the two. Isabel’s eyes were drooping closed tiredly, but she was still watching the stars with Farlan, a smile on both of their faces.

He’d promised he’d get them above ground if it was the last thing he did, and he’d done it. He wouldn’t regret it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this, please feel free to give a kudos or a comment- I love reading all your feedback and interacting with you guys!


	11. Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't expect to have this part out, honestly, but I just had to write it. Sorry if there are a lot of mistakes, I wrote it really fast and through my tears.  
> In the end, I tried to make it feel more urgent and fast-paced, so hopefully you feel that too.  
> Sorry if Levi seems more emotional than he should be, I got emotionalyl invested in this part and put it into him.
> 
> The next update won't be out until Sunday at the absolute earliest; I'm going on a trip for the week, so I won't have my laptop or any free time to write. I kind of feel bad for leaving you on this note, but, uh, yeah...
> 
> Warning: Character death.

The weather didn’t clear up much overnight. It still rained heavily, and it only periodically lightened up. Levi stayed up late when people fell asleep, speaking to Isabel and Farlan in hushed tones.

_“It’s really beautiful,” Isabel murmured. Levi could tell she was tired and wanted to go to sleep, but none of them wanted to leave this little moment they were having together._

_“You know, we never doubted it when you said you’d get us above ground,” Farlan stated, and Levi looked towards him. He raised an eyebrow._

_“I remember the first time you said it,” the male continued, his eyes stuck on the cloudy sky outside the window, a nostalgic, amused smile on his lips. “You were covered in mud and Isabel was trying to entertain you while I checked the bruises on your ribs. You were furious, then, because the Military Police had been abusing their authority again, and you’d called a bit too much attention to yourself. You were all but shaking in anger at them, Levi,” Farlan laughed softly, shaking his head._

_“ ‘We’re getting out of this shit hole,’ you said, ‘I swear, I’ll get us out of this place.’ You were so determined, and I didn’t doubt you. I knew you would, or you’d die trying,” Farlan said. He looked down at Levi, then, and he grinned. “I know you’re not one for sappy moments, Levi, but I’m forcing you to accept this one. Thank you, Levi.”_

_Isabel sat up, then, and her eyes were watery, and Levi braced himself. He wasn’t one for sappy moments like these, but he’d be the worst liar if he said his chest wasn’t warm and he wasn’t smiling. Isabel pressed her lips together, nodding her head._

_“Levi-bro!” She cried out, hurrying to lower her voice when she looked around at the sleeping people around them. She shifted slightly, and then suddenly threw her arms over his shoulders in a tight hug. Levi threw a hand out to balance himself against the wall, a small gasp forcing past his lips. Farlan chuckled beside them._

_“We never doubted you!” Isabel agreed, nodding enthusiastically. “And you did it! Levi- thank you, thank you, thank you,” she gushed, and Levi let out a sigh. He pushed her back so he could see her, and he shook his head._

_“Don’t cry about it, Isabel,” he said, his voice unusually soft, and he lifted a hand up to let his fingers wipe the tear under her eyes. The girl pursed her lips, angrily trying to hold her tears back._

_“Damn both of you,” Levi sighed, and his other arm pulled Farlan into his side while he pulled Isabel back against his chest. He heard Isabel take shaky breaths, and Farlan gave Levi a knowing smile. Levi scoffed, playfully rolling his eyes. When Farlan closed his eyes and returned the hug, Levi returned the smile._

_“You’re the best, Levi,” Isabel sniffled, and Levi minutely shake his head._

_“Shut up,” Levi muttered sarcastically, and he felt Isabel’s fist tighten in his shirt._

_“Accept our love, Levi,” Farlan joked, and Levi snorted. He smiled silently for a moment, and closed his eyes, allowed himself this moment._

_“Of course I love you too, idiots.”_

Levi didn’t often allow him moments like the one last night- he didn’t often have them. But the moment was fitting last night, and he couldn’t just ignore it last night.

Now, in the morning, people were beginning to wake up slowly. Isabel was still asleep, using his lap as a pillow, and Farlan was sleeping soundly right next to him, forehead pressed against his thigh.

Levi carefully shifted Isabel’s head off his thigh, his gaze lingering on her face, her lips parted and a small trail of drool slipping out of the corner of her mouth. He grunted quietly as he hauled himself to his feet, stretching his stiff muscles. A few satisfying cracks came as he stretched, and he quietly stepped around people to reach his canteen of water and taking a long swig of water.

He could hear people groaning and shifting and sitting up, canteens being opened and backpacks being opened. He nudged Farlan with his toes until his eyes flickered open, and then he moved onto Isabel, shaking her shoulder until she woke up and tried to push him off.

“Go away,” she grumbled, and Levi just continued to nudge her.

“Get up,” he said, and Isabel moaned in protest but slowly sat up, running her hand through her hair and pushing it back from her face. Sluggishly, she took her hair out of the ponytail it was in to redo it neatly. She got to her feet, stretching her arms above her head.

Levi used some of the water from his canteen to wash his hands and face, getting rid of the grimy feeling from not having a shower out here, and he spotted Farlan and a few others doing the same. It didn’t take people long to get up and sorted, having a few bites of their rations for breakfast and washing their faces, stretching out their limbs and chatting amongst each other. Levi was talking quietly to Farlan when Erwin came downstairs- when had he even gone upstairs?- and his footsteps made everyone quieten.

“I don’t think the rain is going to lighten any time soon, so there’s no point wasting time waiting for it to,” the Commander said, pulling his cloak around his shoulders and his hood onto his head. “If you’re all done and ready, we’re going to head out. Annie, Eren, Sasha and Connie, you will stay here to guard everything. Take turns keeping watch, and if you need to, two of you can go together to set traps to try and catch anything if you think our food rations need it.” The four addressed all nodded, thumping their fists to their chests and then sliding off to the side.

“Everyone else, we’re going to head towards the forest. We’ll split into our squads and do some laps of the forest trails and the area surrounding, and then complete some training and trust exercises before heading back,” he explained, and then he headed for the door, everyone trailing after him.

Beside Levi, Isabel buzzed with excitement and energy, and even Farlan was enthusiastic, too. “Can you even believe it, Levi?” Isabel gasped, fumbling with her horses’ saddle. “It’s insane- look at us! Part of the Survey Corps, killing titans, saving humanity!” She exclaimed, and Levi let out a small chuckle that he disguised as a snort, shaking his head fondly at her childish enthusiasm.

“This is serious, Isabel,” he said, and she playfully glared at him.

“Of course it is,” she replied, “that’s why it’s so crazy!”

“Hurry up, we’re all almost ready, idiot.”

The girl did so, fumbling with her horses bridle and just as she went to pull herself onto the saddle, Levi caught her arm and stopped her. Then, he bent down and fixed the horses’ girth on so the saddle didn’t just fall off, and then nudged her forwards. Her cheeks flushed a soft pink and she muttered something dismissively before hauling herself up.

Levi left her to get onto his own horse, and his heels nudged her into a walk to follow everyone out. He slid into formation by Erwin’s left side, and he glanced at Farlan and Isabel, side by side, to his left. Farlan was smiling as Isabel rambled on, most likely still about their insane situation, and Levi’s lips twitched before he looked away.

Erwin’s eyes roamed over everyone, checking the formation was correct, before he waved his arm high and nudged his horse into a walk, then a trot, then a canter, and everyone followed on.

The horses’ hooves kicked up dirty water from puddles but stayed firm in the slippery grass, though the rain was quick to make his clothes uncomfortable and the wind whipped his emerald cloak around him, threatened to blow his hood down, and chilled his exposed hands gripping the reins of his horse until they were pale from the chill. Still, no one seemed to really care about the poor weather. No titans were in sight as they travelled, and Levi watched as the cluster of trees slowly grew closer and closer, taller and intimidating, and god, was it weird to see a tree.

Isabel and Farlan’s curiosity at the towering trees made him feel slightly less embarrassed, because of course, none of them had seen anything so big, had been in a fucking forest, and it still threw him slightly. Did the people around him even know how lucky they were to grow up in sunlight, to feel rain kiss their skin and to be able to see the stars at night and the sky explode in a masterpiece of colour every morning and every night?

Of course they didn’t. They’d grown up with it, not with mud and dirt and cold surrounding them, rotting wood and drunk men and starving prostitutes just trying to make a living, not with gangs every corner and having to beat people up just to make a name for yourself so you weren’t on the receiving end.

Levi forced the bitterness from his mind, and he watched as trees sped past him.

“Split off!” Erwin’s voice was loud and clear through the splashing from the horses’ hooves, and with the command, the formation began to split as paths came their way. Levi followed behind the commander as he rode straight forwards, but his eyes followed Farlan and Isabel as they branched off with their squad and broke left, following a path deeper into one side of the forest, as did the people on his right. The group behind them drew closer and joined them, and Levi leaned further forwards on his horse.

They didn’t ride for much longer before a towering flash of flesh caught his eye, and the titan stumbled through the trees, followed by another two of varying heights.

“Levi! Take the two on the left, Bertholdt, take the one on the right!” Erwin barked. Levi shifted on his saddle subconsciously and broke off from his squad, Bertholdt by his side, and he couldn’t help but feel discomforted by it. Farlan should be on his right side, not Bertholdt.

Still, there was nothing he could do, so he nodded at Bertholdt and threw himself off his horse when he neared the grinning giant and his anchors thudded into its’ thick flesh and arced him up.

His blades glinted in the limited light filtering through storm clouds and tree leaves before slicing through the titans nape, and he was instantly swinging around a tree to return to the next one. It was shorter and reaching for him, it’s eyes wide and hand open. Levi swung out of the way of that hand, but just before he pressed for his gas to propel him forwards, its’ other hand suddenly shot up, large fingers wrapping around his torso in a bruising grip.

Air escaped his lungs and for a moment, he was stunned from the suddenness and frozen from sudden fear, but his arms weren’t stuck. The titan pulled him closer to its ugly face and opened its mouth eagerly, and just as he came close enough, he hurtled his blades forwards.

With an inhuman shriek, the giant let him go and its’ hands balled into fists. Levi used his gear to pull him back up, snatching the hilts of his blades and leaving the actual things in its’ eyes, and he resupplied his blades as he swung around its back, dodging its’ blind lashing out for him, and then cut out its’ nape.

It fell with a thud, breaking tree branches as it fell, and Levi slowed his descent with his gear, landing next to his dark-coloured mare and watching its’ hideous corpse begin to steam.

“Good one, Levi!” Bertholdt called, riding past on his horse and back to the squad, and Levi simply nodded and hurried back onto his horse.

Erwin had just landed back onto his own horse and ridden back to the front of the formation, having taken out another titan that had made its’ way close to them, and he seemed hardly fazed.

Levi wondered how long he’d been doing this for, how many titans he’d slain.

How many people had died by his side.

“Push forwards!” He yelled, and Levi understood, sort of. Understood why people would choose to follow this man to what could be their deaths or the deaths of their friends. Why this man was the Commander. God, he’d be a waste of a life if he was doing anything else, Levi could tell. The fire in his voice that spurred people on to risk their lives for the people around them, the people back home, for a hope no one knew was full-proof. The level-head, the strategists’ mind, the look in his eyes when another life was lost and the look in his eyes when he greeted and commanded the next set of soldiers.

Maybe he’d seen that same thing back in the Underground, felt the fire in him even down in that shithole, and responded to it. He still wasn’t sure if he’d made the right decision, but he told himself that it was a decision he wouldn’t regret.

The rain seemed to only pour down harder, even through the small shelter the thick trees provided, as if the sky was determined to beat them down personally. Fat drops of water fell off leaves and soaked their clothes and their horses slipped in the mud and puddles steadily growing more.

“If this keeps up it’ll be too dangerous to continue.” He heard Erwin mutter to himself, his eyes steely and jaw clenched. He supposed there was a sense of shame and waste and disappointment every time a mission had to be delayed or called off, even if it was only a small one. Everything mattered when you were a public figure like him, or responsible for the lives of those around you.

A flash of a titan nearby was the first warning of them coming, and the crash of the tree it pushed aside was the next. It startled some of the horses, throwing them off and making some slide and buck and neigh in distress, and Levi heard someone behind him yelp in surprise.

Levi, out of pure reflex as shock coursed through him, threw himself off his horse and immediately towards the first titan- a towering giant with greasy hair and a blood-stained grin.

Blood-stained.

“The titans have already killed people!” Levi yelled through the noise of commotion and rain, and he didn’t waste a minute in finding the things weak spot and cutting it.

He wondered who had died to it.

More titans lumbered through the trees, and one, though it was closest to Jean, leapt, _leapt,_ towards Levi. It opened its’ mouth as if expecting to catch him in the air like a dog leaping for treats, but Levi threw himself just out of the way and it crashed to the ground, breaking branches and making a tall tree sway dangerously.

Covered in mud, it hauled itself to its’ knees and swatted its hands up towards him, and Levi staggered on a thick tree branch for a moment. _What the hell is it doing…?_

“Levi! It’s an abnormal, be careful!” Someone- Jean- yelled, and he thought briefly back to what Armin had told him. Abnormals didn’t act like any other titan; they were completely unpredictable and more dangerous.

Levi muttered a curse under his breath and pushed his soaking hood back down his head- it was only getting in his way, now- and jumped off the tree.

The titan grinned like a toddler as Levi neared, its’ hands grasping out for him, and Levi narrowly dodged it, spinning around its wrist as three fingers fell to the ground in a puff of steam. It moaned, frowning briefly as it slowly turned its’ head to watch Levi spin around it, change the hold on his blades, and zero in on its’ nape.

It slumped face-first against a tree, steam momentarily blinding Levi and scalding his skin.

Someone screamed, and Levi looked to the source of the sound just in time to see someone- he hadn’t even gotten their name- fall into a titans open mouth. Someone else flew past its nape too late.

“Levi!” Someone yelled, and Levi turned around. An eye the size of himself was staring right beside him, blinking slowly, as a titan rested its head a foot above the ground, and then jerked its head forwards, opening its’ mouth.

Levi swore, pushing off the ground and throwing his anchors into a tree behind him, sharply yanking him back harsh enough to give him whiplash.

The titan aiming for him lifted itself from the ground, getting sloppily to its’ mud-soaked feet, and began to stumble towards him, head lolling lazily to the side. Its’ hand lashed out for him and sent broken tree branches his way, a few colliding with him and causing litters of little scratches and tears in his clothes and bruises that were sure to hurt tomorrow. A drip of blood from a cut on his forehead fell into his eye, and he closed it tightly, felt it drip down his cheek when he opened it again like a sick parody of a tear.

He leapt to the tree beside him to avoid another brutal strike of its’ hand, and then shot off it, soaring through the trees and around its back. His blades collided with its’ shoulder as it turned suddenly, and he grit his teeth, quickly dropping the blades out of their hilts and turning to his last pair of blades on his person. He shot aside, spun around a tree, and threw his anchors into its other shoulder.

He grit his teeth, hair soaring back as he spun in the air, each spin giving him shocking momentum, and then he sped past its’ nape, blades mercilessly cutting a chunk out, and the damned thing finally fell.

He landed on beside it and jumped aside to see through the steam, turning to look at the squad. There were only a couple left, and he readied himself to go to the nearest one.

A burst of red lit up to his side, and though it was far away it was a shock and he closed his eyes briefly.

“Distress call!” Erwin yelled. “Reiner, Levi, go towards the call!” He ordered, and he caught Levi’s eyes briefly before the raven-haired man fell onto his horse.

“Yes sir!” Reiner called, and he tried to ignore the red flare that shot up from the other side as the two of them rode away from the squad, and the other squad that needed help.

Levi wasn’t even sure of which way they were heading now, disorientated from the chaos a moment ago, and ice grew in his veins as he prayed, sickly, that he was heading towards the right squads.

Bodies slowly began to greet them at random intervals as they rode, spread out and killed in different ways- crushed against a tree, hanging from their own wires tangled around a tree branch and missing half of their body, limbs scattered around as if an explosion had gone off, and blood mixed with the puddles growing. The trees began to thin as they came closer to the edge of the forest.

“Reiner,” Levi said, jerking his horses reins to stop it. Someone was slumped against the base of a tree, watching them with pain in his eyes. His left leg was missing from the knee down, but he was still breathing.

Levi jumped off his horse and to his side, hands going to the wound as if he could save him.

He’d been surrounded by death all his life. He’d seen corpses no more than skeletons get dragged out of alleys, had drove a knife between a mans ribs and killed him himself, had tucked his mothers’ wasting-away body into the only bed they had in the room. So _why_ was it getting to him now? Why were his hands, now drenched in sticky blood, shaking?

“S-stop,” the man groaned, his voice barely a whisper and almost drowned out by the heavy rain. His hand, grip weak and barely there, was on Levi’s bloody wrist.

“The-the titan… It chased them further ou-out…” He gasped, and his eyes were tearing up now. Whether it was the realisation he was seconds away from dying in the mud or from the pain, or both, Levi wasn’t sure.

“T-that way,” he moaned, and weakly pointed over Levi’s shoulder. He could see hoof marks in the mud, drips of blood, and giant footprints following.

When Levi looked back, the man was dead. Falling towards the side, and letting go of Levi’s arm, and Levi froze.

“Levi! We have to go! There’s nothing we can do for him now, but others need our help!” Reiner yelled, a firm hand gripping his shoulder.

Levi stood up. Right. Of course.

He got back onto his horse- his hands were staining the saddle with blood and his reins slipped in his trembling grip- and he followed Reiner in the direction the (now dead) man had pointed in.

The titan was there, alright. In a pile of limbs and bodies torn apart and blades discarded and so much blood.

The titan, bent over on all four limbs, with sharp ears and greasy hair, didn’t notice them yet.

Levi pulled his horse to a stop, and he noticed Reiner staring at him- a mix of horror and sympathy watched him.

He chose to ignore it, looked towards the titan, and then the thing by his horse caught his eyes. A head with no body, reddish-brown hair matted with mud and blood, and forest green eyes staring at the dark sky, her mouth twisted open.

Levi felt his jaw drop and his ribs closed around his lungs and heart painfully. His body shook, and his stomach threatened to spill everything in it.

“Is-Isabel…?” He croaked, and then got off- threw himself off- his horses’ saddle and fell to his knees in the cold mud that stained his clothes.

His hands, still covered in someone elses blood, hovered over her head, unsure of what to do.

She didn’t have a body. Where was her body? She-she- oh, god, and Levi realised he had moaned that aloud.

His hands rested on her cheeks, and then drew back when it stained her with more blood. He felt like he couldn’t breathe, even though he was breathing too fast.

He cried out, then, and the titan turned to look at him. From its’ pointed teeth and red eyes dangled a body, and they were alive- still alive- and he opened his mouth, reached a hand out to Levi, then it bit down and shook its’ head, threw the body through the air until it skidded a few feet from Levi, and oh, _god._

“ _Farlan!”_ Levi screamed, and oh, it was a scream. His vocal chords protested and his throat closed with horror, and he really was crying now. His heart ached when he shifted away from Isabel’s head to go to Farlan, but it ached more when he didn’t go to Farlan’s side, and he was only _half a body_ and staring _right at him_ and there was _blood everwhere_.

“Levi! We have to go! We can’t handle this- it’ll kill us too!” He could hear Reiner yelling from behind him, but did it matter? Furlan was looking at him with dead eyes and Isabel was only a head and if they were dead, he had to be too.

The titan moved closer to him, and something in him snapped, tore apart.

Levi staggered to his feet, wiped his tears with hands that left blood staining his cheeks instead, and stumbled towards the titan.

“Levi!”

The titan’s cheeks puffed.

The force with which Levi hit it with forced the titan, the monster, to stumble back, and then he brought himself back down, and then away, and then back with a guttural yell. He retreated each time before the titan could reach him, but he was too fast for it to even see him.

He spun around it, a scream or a yell tearing his throat each time flew past it, sliced deep into its skin, and then he was out of reach and spinning back towards it. All he could see was their eyes, dead, unseeing- no, Farlan had looked right at him, and then he’d died, he’d seen Levi and thought he was coming to save him, even if he couldn’t save Isabel- but he’d been too slow and he’d died right in front of him- the next cut on the titan was deep, and so was the next, and the next, and _the next_ , deeper and deeper _and deeper_.

It reached for him and he sliced up its’ arm, arms that had reached for Isabel and tore her head off her shoulders- _deeper and deeper and deeper_ \- and then its’ muddy, gross fingers and he slashed and _slashed and slashed_ until they fell apart.

He cut a trench in its’ collar bones and rounded its’ shoulder cut its’ back, soared through a spray of its’ steaming hot blood, and screamed as he cut the back of its’ knees out and he slashed and _slashed and slashed and slashed and slashed_ it apart.

Its’ blood was as heavy as the rain, spraying out of hundreds of different wounds, and when its’ head came off with a guttural cry from Levi, it still screamed a deep, damned, inhuman scream before it lurched forwards.

Blindly, it reached up, and Levi cut its’ hand apart again, and then spun around its arm and cut and cut and cut ( _and cut and cut and cut and cut and cut_ ) and then he was at its’ nape and he viciously threw his blades into the spot that would kill it- though the fucking monster didn’t deserve to die yet, it deserved so much more than to be torn apart by Levi’s blades- and then he fell.

Landed on his knees in the mud, next to Isabel’s bloody head, and he didn’t dare look away from her unseeing eyes, even as the titan behind him collapsed in a bloody, steaming mess, and the sound of horses slowly approached.

_“Thank you, Levi-bro!”_

_“We never doubted you, Levi.”_

They should have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry... That's all I have to say. Feel free to curse me out in the comments, I'm doing it to myself too for this, but...  
> Yeah.  
> I hope you liked it, in a sick, emotionless way? 
> 
> You can contact me on Tumblr @genderfxck-Levi if you want to talk
> 
> See you in the next update, if anyone wants to continue reading after this haha.


	12. Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the hideously long wait! But hey, better late than never, right? I'm trying to have a little system where I'll update one fic, then the next, then the next, etcetera, so they're updated equally, but we'll see how that goes.
> 
> Anyhow, I hope you do enjoy this part, and I'll see you in the next!
> 
> If you're looking for any other Levi-centric fics, feel free to check my other works; I've got a lot of Levi-centric ones other than this.

It was ironic that only now did the rain begin to clear up, as if the rain was too much of a coward to stay after what it had just witnessed. Levi cursed it, because the sun cast golden rays across the endless grassy hills and warmed his skin and lit up the blood in the grass and on the discarded blades and on bodies and body parts and on his clothes and still wet on his skin.

He was, somehow, both aware but not completely acknowledging it as horses approached, because of course, of course, they came now when it was far too late.

Isabel’s head was inches from his knees, and her eyes were blindly staring at the clearing sky, and Furlan, just beyond her, was still staring directly at him.

Levi’s chest tightened, yet he couldn’t look away from them.

“Reiner, did you do that?”

“No, sir. Levi… Levi did that, sir.”

Erwin acknowledged the fact with a quiet hum and a nod, glancing to the steaming, destroyed titan corpse somewhere behind Levi.

“Any survivors?”

“N-No, sir…”

“Tsk… Pathetic.”

Levi’s eyes snapped up, then, locking onto an impassive looking Erwin- no, not impassive, but completely closed off and playing impassive- who was watching him back carefully. Pathetic? How dare he.

Levi’s teeth ground together painfully, and he staggered to his feet. The despair and pain that had been overwhelming him a moment ago had turn quickly to fury, and his trembling, blood slick hands gripped the hilts of his blades, blunt and spider-webbed with little cracks, though he wielded them as if they were the deadliest weapons forged.

His knees shook dangerously, and he felt slightly light-headed and nauseous, but he took heavy steps towards Erwin, who had slid off his horse at some point and was holding the reins. Mike was by his side, looking stressed but determined, and he warily watched Levi.

For a moment they just stared at each other, Erwin’s blue eyes unreadable, and Levi’s, a mix of pain and anger, surrounded by splatters of blood. And then, Erwin, ever so subtly, rose an eyebrow and looked back, letting out a sigh of disappointment at the mess in front of him, and the gesture made Levi snap.

He rose his blades and, in a torn, croaky voice, cried; “I’ll… Kill you!”

He hardly got within two feet of the Commander before Mike had stepped forwards, blocking him with his own blades, and a set of hands on his shoulders, firm and unrelenting but not harsh, held him. Levi didn’t try to fight the resistance, and it was as if it sucked the sudden anger was suddenly leached from him.

His fingers unfurled and he let his blades drop onto the wet grass and mud by his feet, and then he followed after them, dropping to his knees.

He had to…

He had to…

Do something. But what? He didn’t know. He had to do something, though, and the feeling was urgent, pressing down on his ribs. They were dead. He wanted to kill Erwin. They were dead.

Dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead.

He needed to breathe, is what he needed to do, and he silently gasped in air that tasted like blood, or maybe that was just in his mouth- he felt covered in it, as if the rain had been fat drops of burning blood instead.

God, he couldn’t do _anything_. He couldn’t even keep them alive, and there was nothing he could do to even save them, keep them clinging to life long enough for first aid. There had been no chance of them surviving, and there was nothing he could do.

His eyes drifted slowly to his discarded blades. Except…

Someone – Erwin – kneeled in front of him, low enough that he blocked his determined gaze on his blades, blue eyes searching his.

“Don’t,” he said, “you’ll only regret it. Don’t make a decision that only has regrets.”

Levi’s heart stuttered, and he looked away from the man and to the blades of grass by his knees. He tightly pressed his lips together, clenching his jaw painfully, and his eyes narrowed, hardened and got colder. His nails dug crescents into the palms of his hands until his eyes dried and breathing eased.

He was acting irrationally. He needed to calm himself down and get himself together.

Isabel and Farlan were dead. _(Because of him.)_

There was nothing he could do. _(If he had just been quicker, earlier, better.)_

He needed to keep going. _(He didn’t want to.)_

They’d call him a bloody idiot if he just sat down and died now. _(Hours ago, they’d told him they never doubted him.)_

Levi pushed himself to his feet, swallowed the lump in his throat down, and looked for his horse. Carts had been brought over, and already the bodies, and body parts, around them were being carefully wrapped up and rested in the carts.

“We shouldn’t stay around in the open like this for long,” he said, and he was slightly amazed at how steady, despite the roughness to it, his voice was. Erwin, now also on his feet, watched Levi for a quiet moment before he nodded and turned his head to the side, looking over everyone.

“Levi’s right. Be as fast as you can, we can’t risk staying out here. If you’re injured go to the unoccupied cart and you’ll be seen to. Once everyone is ready, we’ll go back to camp and meet with everyone else, and then head back to the walls. We’ve had too many losses, and I won’t risk anymore. I’ve already sent the other squads back before us to prepare the camp for the injured, and we need to finish this quickly.”

Everyone hurried to comply with Erwin’s words, staying careful but hurrying their jobs. Some people slowly made their way to the unoccupied cart where medical supplies and a medic was, hurrying to see to the worst injuries.

A hand rested on Levi’s shoulder, and Erwin looked down at Levi. “Are you injured?” He asked quietly, and Levi had to think about that for a moment. His body ached and felt exhausted, and there was so much blood on him, some steaming and some staining, he was unsure if any of it was actually his.

At the very least, he was sure that he wasn’t terribly injured, and therefore he was fine.

“No.” He shook his head, looked at the blood on his hands, felt it drying on his face. “It isn’t mine.”

Erwin was quiet at that, lips in a tight, straight line, before he nodded. “As long as you’re sure. Find your horse and get ready to leave.”

Levi’s eyes sought out his dark-coated mare and he found her standing off to the side next to a stony-faced Reiner who had a hold on her reins. He made his way over to the horse. In the new sunlight he could see the smeared blood from his hands drying on her saddle, some matted in her coat, and he forced himself to not react as he hauled himself up, taking the reins from Reiner.

In front of him, he saw someone gently handling Farlan’s corpse, taking him off towards one of the ‘corpse carts’. Isabel's head wasn't in the mud any more.

“Levi…” Reiner spoke up, and Levi knew what he was going to say.

“Don’t.”

Reiner frowned at him but didn’t go further, and Levi turned his gaze away from him. He waited in silence as injuries were tended to and bodies were retrieved and when it was finally done everyone fell into formation, Levi nudging his horse on towards Erwin’s side.

They rode in silence back to the camp save for the occasional quiet cry or sniffle, everyone settling into their grief and no one wanting to talk. They were focused on getting the bodies of their friends back home safely, dreading the inevitable speech they’d have to give to families about their loss, the funerals to be held, the hate the Survey Corps would receive for leading yet another group of young people to their deaths.

Fortunately enough, they encountered no titans on the way back to camp, much to Levi’s pleasure. Damned be Erwin’s rules, he’d throw himself off his horse at the sound of a heavy footstep or sight of something tall moving and kill the monster as swiftly as possible.

People were already waiting outside for them, horses taken care of and smoke coming out of the chimney of the main building. People were there, ready to take their horses and help the injured down from the carts and inside.

Levi saw Eren hurry over to him, wide-eyed at the utter state of him in worry. His hands reached up when Levi brought his horse to a stop, offering to help Levi down off his horse.

“Are you okay, Levi?” He gasped, and Levi ignored his help, carelessly sliding down from his horse. For a moment he stared blankly at Eren, almost coldly. He was aware that he should say something, reply to him, but he couldn’t at that moment. He felt… Angry at him, for some reason. How could he ask him that? How dare he care about him now that Farlan and Isabel were dead, as if only they were allowed to care about him.

“Levi?” He realised he had been staring rudely at Eren for several moments, his eyes cold, nails digging into the sensitive skin of his palms. He blinked several times, forced himself to let his fists unfurl, and his tongue dashed out along his dry lips.

“Fine,” he said abruptly, shaking his head a few times. Eren’s eyes looked him up and down, at the blood and mud matting his hair, staining his clothes, splattered across his cheeks.

“If you’re injured, we’ve set up places inside- here, let me help you in,” the kid insisted, and someone was pulling Levi’s reins from his hand and guiding his horse to the makeshift stable.

“I’m fine,” Levi stated, firmly, and looked away at the people sliding out of carts and off their horses. Eren looked at him doubtfully, but pressed his lips together. His blonde counterpart came over, then, happy to see Levi but concerned at his frightening state.

“What… What happened?” He asked, voice breathy and worried. “Commander Erwin sent our squads right back and… We knew something was wrong, but…”

“Ambush and an a-abnormal.” He cursed the way his voice trembled when he referred to the last titan, and he defensively narrowed his eyes, clenched his jaw and ground his teeth painfully. Changed the pain to burning anger.

Armin exchanged a look with Eren, and then his blue, innocent eyes were looking around at the wave of people coming over; sorting horses, helping injured people inside, putting away supplies.

“Where’s Isabel? And Farlan? We didn’t see them come into the house.” Eren, this time. Levi was sure Armin probably already knew, and judging by the look on Mikasa’s face, standing a few feet away but within earshot, she probably already knew, too. They were inseparable, after all.

Pain lashed up his throat, and he forced it down with fury, fuelled his anger, and he glared at Eren. “Dead,” he spat, choked the words out of his closing throat, “they’re dead.”

Eren’s eyes widened (Armin looked shamefully at the ground), and he tried to backpedal.

“Levi – I – I’m so sorry, I didn’t-“

“Don’t. It’s my fucking fault, not yours, brat,” he seethed, and god, did he need to punch something. By the look Mikasa gave him for snapping at the brunette in front of him, he was half tempted to make it her. Damn Eren, damn her, damn the entire Survey Corpse and pathetic dregs that were left of humanity, hiding behind walls and living under some shitty nobles’ boot. Damn them all to Hell.

Levi turned on his heel and left, shoving his way through people (though his murderous expression made people move before he could shove them) and he rounded to the far side of the camp, behind one building, and away from everyone.

Back in the Underground whenever he was this angry, what would he do? At this rate if he didn’t do something, he was going to explode and lash out and get himself thrown into some prison cell.

Sometimes, he and Farlan would spar. They’d spar violently for hours, not holding back. The day after they’d both be covered in bruises and scratches, walking with a limp and sitting stiffly. But here, there was no one that would do that with him. Maybe Mikasa would be willing; she seemed to have disliked him right from the moment he stepped foot in their room after all, and snapping at her precious Eren would probably make her more than happy to punch him.

No, he wasn’t going to get in a fight with someone.

Instead, he balled his hand into a fist, and impulsively slammed it into the building he’d been leaning against moments ago. There was a crack, either from his knuckles or the building, or both, and then his other fist followed, and then he brought the first one back, and then changed, and kept on punching blindly, putting his anger and pain behind each lethal punch.

It’d only been an hour or so and he was already an unstable wreck. By the time his knuckles were scraped up and bloody and his arms hurt, his lungs burned, he slumped against the wall, setting his forehead against the cool surface and took in shaking breaths until he could breathe normally again.

He’d gotten it out, now he had to move on. They were still outside of the walls, they were still vulnerable. If nothing else, he had to be in the right mind to possibly save anyone else from death on the way back to the walls. He wouldn’t be too late for anyone else.

Levi shook a few droplets of thick blood from his knuckles, and returned to camp.

Everyone in the camp was frantic, hurrying to ready their horses and putting away all of their supplies. Some people were bandaged and laying or sitting in the carts they had, while some people were just being tended to in the house. Levi looked around, pursing his lips, before he found Erwin standing outside with Hanji, talking with tight expressions.

Levi approached them, cold eyes on Erwin who turned his attention to him.

“What can I do to help?” Levi asked, tilting his head up to catch his eyes. Erwin glanced around thoughtfully.

“If you’re injured, go inside and get yourself tended to. If not, you can start by getting some water from inside and cleaning yourself up. Then you can help getting the horses ready or putting supplies away. We’re almost done, however, so there’s not too much for you to do.” The Commander told him, and Levi responded with a simple, tense nod. He did want to get this filth off of him and though he’d rather a hot shower, he knew that was impossible out here.

Levi made his way into the main building they had been using, now currently filled with the remaining injured people, and those best trained as a medic were tending to them. Some eyes flicked to him when he entered and, thinking he was injured, one person- he knew them… Christa- stood up, hurrying over to him with bandages clutched in her hand.

“Levi!” She cried. “Why didn’t you come earlier – look at you!” Immediately she began to fuss over him, trying to drag him over to a seat. Ymir was in the room, and she gave him a look that told him to be kind. 

“I’m not injured, Christa,” he told her, standing his ground when she, unsuccessfully, tried to pull him aside. “I just need some water.”

The girls’ expression faltered, cheeks heating up slightly. “Oh, right – sorry about that,” she chuckled sheepishly, scratching the back of her neck. “There’s some spare water over here.” She pointed over to the table where there was a few canteens set up and Levi muttered his thanks, snatching up one of them and then heading outside and stood off to the side. He took his filthy cloak off, snagging it on a bit of the wall of the building so it wasn’t on the muddy floor, and then he uncapped the canteen, tipping his head down and he began to pour little bits over his head, running his fingers through his hair and working the blood out of his hair. Then, he moved on to scrubbing the dried blood off his face, and then finished with his hands once he assumed he’d gotten all or most of the blood and mud off his skin.

With a little water left, he poured it down his dry throat, relishing in it as it soothed his sore throat and settled into his empty stomach.

He thought he’d gotten all, or at least most of, the blood off his skin and out of his hair, though there wasn’t much he could do about his clothes- he’d have to just leave them until they got back to base, much to his displeasure.

Levi shoved the empty canteen into one of the packs he passed, shoved off into a cart, and then he focused on helping put the remainder of their supplies away. He listened numbly to the quiet chatter around him, everyone hushed and tense, until Erwin’s loud, steady voice broke through it, instructing everyone to head to their horses once they were done, and to get into formation to leave.

On his way to his own horse, that he had yet to name he realised, a hand gently sat on his shoulder, and the raven startled, looking up and then scowling at the dark-haired girl who was responsible for the hand on his shoulder.

“Levi,” she said, and Levi shrugged her hand off, “we may not be friends, but Eren and Armin seem to like you. If you need to talk to someone, we’re here.”

Levi considered Mikasa for a moment, her blank, almost cold, expression, except for- there, the little bit of held back sympathy, the offer at something that might end up close to friendship. And so he forced himself to nod tensely and walk away from her and to his horse.

Would he take any of them up on that offer? No.

At least someone had washed the blood from his saddle and reins and combed it from her coat. He didn’t want to see that blood again- whose even was it?

Slowly, everyone got on their horses and lead them out, waiting a few paces out of the settlement until the Commander came back to lead them out. They slid into formation, silently following him back to the walls.

The sun was setting, casting the grassy plains in a heavenly golden light, and everyone was quiet. There was still an occasional sob or sniffle from someone, and no one dared risk breaking the silence to have a conversation. Even Erwin was tense, and Levi noted that it probably wasn’t well-received for the Survey Corps to come back early from outside of the walls, especially with a large amount of casualties and losses.

The setting sun was behind him, casting long shadows over the grass and a chill was steadily setting into his bones, casting his breath out in little clouds of mist. Beyond the rhythmic appearance of the little cloud of mist he could make out the towering walls that promised safety (did they really, though?) and that now served as his home.

Levi cast his eyes around at the grassy plains dotted with occasional trees and small, ruins of houses. If not for the titans, or even just a way of keeping a certain area safe from them, Levi would much prefer to just live out here, away from the walls and people, and unknown to everyone. Maybe, years later, after he’d passed away, someone would stumble upon his house and there’d be some story about the man who lived alone within titan territory. Or, preferably, no one would ever find out about his home or existence, and it’d all be peaceful.

That train of thought carried him for some time, and when he snapped out of his thoughts they were already approaching the walls, and he craned his neck to look up at them, watched the gate groan as it opened.

Just inside the walls, people were gathering on the streets once more, murmuring among themselves.

_“Back so soon? That’s never good…”_

_“They’re dead, then. Lead a group of our people out to die and ran back here.”_

_“Bastards.”_

 Levi ignored them, his cold eyes trained forwards at Erwin’s back. The Commander was tense, but not noticeably so. Levi could just see it in the way he looked around, his tense jaw, detached tone. Even the people sniffling had gone quiet and stony-faced, trying to pull a strong face in public. At least there weren’t as many people watching them come back now as there had been when they left that morning.

By the time they reached the castle that homed the Survey Corps, Levi was exhausted. He felt utterly drained and like he could just fall asleep on the back of his horse. His body ached with each step his horse took and jolted him forwards in the saddle, and he had a steadily growing ache behind his eyes.

He didn’t waste any time in getting his horse set up back in her stable, and he left her with a sugar cube before hurrying out of the stables. It seemed everyone else was just as eager to get inside, some hurrying to the mess hall, others going right to the showers and bedrooms.

He was one of the latter, eager to clean the dust and dirt and remaining blood off of him. He hardly acknowledged the other people in the showers with him and just stayed there until his skin was red and sensitive from the torrent of hot water and compulsive scrubbing. He shoved his clothes back on and towelled his hair dry a bit, and then he found his bed, in the middle of two empty ones, and fell into it.

The room was silent and dark, no light seeping in through the heavy curtains closed across the wall-length windows, and the people currently in the room weren’t in the mood to talk; which was good, because Levi wasn’t either.

Instead, Levi stared up at the ceiling with burning eyes and a tight throat and an overwhelming sense of self-loathing. The beds either side of him were empty and cold. At some point, his eyes fell closed and he curled onto his side, clutching the blankets on his bed with shaking, angry hands, and he fell asleep into dreams that were completely black and drowned his subconscious in foreboding and horror.

 


	13. Note

I’m going to be rewriting this soon. 

I really liked the idea and plot I had planned but you know the saying “good idea, poor execution.”

I’m not overly happy with how I’ve written it so far, so I’ll be editing/rewriting it. Possibly, probably, will just delete this and repost it, so for those who still are interested in it, keep any eye out for that happening.

Sorry for the hiatus from this, but it’ll be back soon! Thanks to everyone who has been patient and here from the start <3


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